Likes Has An Interesting Series Of Definitions For ‘Dangerous Sexual Positions’

I hadn't heard of the website Likes.com before today, but after spending some time browsing their site, they appear to be a BuzzFeed rip-off written by people with a bunch of half-formed ideas for Top 10 lists. In fact, many of their lists seem like Top 4 lists expanded to Top 10 lists. Take their latest piece "10 Dangerous Sex Positions," for example. It's got some really obvious positions to avoid and then becomes laden with specious reasoning in an attempt to pad it out to 10.

As a matter of fact, it basically devolves into a list of potential problems with common sexual positions like "Woman on Top" and "Missionary," which I would have to argue are both far from "Dangerous." Spelling errors like "If she's thrusting a little too hare, you might have a problem," aside, there are bigger problems at play in this article. Take a look...

All the way down at number 9 is Shower Sex, which admittedly can be dangerous, so it's inclusion makes sense.

"Sure shower sex is passionate, but one wrong slip and BAM!"

Okay, that makes sense. It's dangerous. Also dangerous is Number 4, The Pogo Stick.

"You’re holding up all her weight and moving her up and down. This my friends can lead to back pain or strains!" 

Sure, we'll go with that. Potentially very dangerous. How about Number 5, though? Doggy Style.

"Yes, every guy LOVES this position. But doctors say the issue is you may be ramming her cervix, which is why deep penetration is often more harmful than hot." 

This is where the reason train starts to go off its track. Sure, there's the potential for danger, but this is far from what could be deemed a dangerous sexual position. Now shit just starts getting weird with Number 6, Missionary.

"Women say missionary doesn't hit the right spots. And if you're on the smaller end of the spectrum, this position doesn't really accentuate your size..."

First of all, they couldn't find a picture or drawing of a couple actually performing in this position? Second of all, they don't even hint at a bit of danger, simply saying it doesn't hit the right spots for the woman, and guys with small dicks don't benefit from it. Number 7 is 69, and steel yourself for more lapses in judgment.

"She's, well, preoccupied. According to survey results, women say it's too difficult to focus on receiving pleasure when they have to concentrate on giving it."

Concentration, focus, pleasure, I don't see anything about danger in there. Moving on to Number 8, Reverse Cowgirl.

"Women say it's hard for them to climax during this position. So they're automatically not into it."

Fragments aside, this is again simply not pleasurable rather than dangerous. Likes.com, I get that you're just trying to get something going over there, but stick to specious scientific reasoning, like your piece about who's going to have the most Ebola by New Year's Eve, and skip the sex talk.

Via Likes.com