Don’t Take It Personally: A Little Bit Of Everything

July 9, 2014
TUCKER-BANKSHOT

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Elkhart, Indiana, a city renowned for its RV manufacturing, is also apparently a lonely, lonely place. One 55 year old gentleman has decided the only salve for his loneliness is to hit up the Casual Encounters page on Craigslist. The only problem is, he's either terrible at technology, or he's just trying to cover all of his bases.

He took out 4 nearly identical ads, all asking for different things.

Need a Blowjob - m4w - 55 (Elkhart)
I am a DD free man living in Elkhart and I desire a blowjob from a woman. I am 6'-2" tall and weigh 245 lbs and am Caucasian. Please put "blowjob" in subject line so I can weed put spam.
DOMINATE ME!!!!! - m4w - 55 (Elkhart)
I am a man age 55, 6'-2" tall, 250#, Caucasian, dark hair, blue eyes seeking a single woman to have the dominant role in the bedroom with me. I like a sexually aggressive woman who does not mind sitting on top of me for coitus. I am a non-Drinker, non smoker and don't do drugs. Please be sure to put "dominatrix" in subject line so I can weed out spam.
Good Man Needs a Job - Hand Job That Is - m4w - 55 (Elkhart)
I am a Caucasian man age 55, 6'-2" tall, 245 lbs., DD free, living in Elkhart who desires a woman to do me by hand. I am concerned about the disease going around and want to stay disease free. So, I think I will just settle for a handjob. If interested, do not hesitate to respond with "handjob" in subject line.
(. )(. ) WANTING TO SUCK TITS ( .)( .) - m4w - 55 (Elkhart)
I am a Caucasian man age 55, 6'-2" tall, 245 lbs., DD free, living in Elkhart who desires a woman for sucking her tits. The responding woman should be someone who likes having her breasts and nipples caressed, kissed and sucked. All shapes and sizes welcome. If interested, do not hesitate to respond with "TITS" in subject line.