Boobs Make Great Ambush Points For Action Figures

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Let's be honest. Everybody wants to play with little plastic army men on a hot girl's body, except everybody's too embarrassed to admit it and/or can't remember where they left all of their toys. Don't try to deny it. You've probably tried marching a platoon down your own tummy but got bored/didn't want them pointing guns at your genitals.

However, Agnieszka Grochowska's naked body makes a wonderful battlefield! It only takes three soldiers standing on her belly to block the canyon of her boobs--very much like the Battle of Thermopylae--but her nipples provide the perfect vantage point for a skilled sniper. Sun Tzu would straight-up cream his pants about that battlefield. Oh, and Agnieszka is sexy, or whatever.

· "Upperdog" (imdb.com)