Apparently, Wiccan Rituals Require Body Fluids And Tits

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Not every Wiccan goddess ritual involves nudity, dancing, and breast milk. Then again, not every Wiccan goddess ritual has Ione Skye, Madonna, and a hip soundtrack by Combustible Edison. These ladies have their game down tight.

We definitely went through a Wiccan phase a while ago, but our spells and incantations never got us anywhere (damn you, pink candles and unrequited love). Now we're starting to think we're going about it the wrong way. We weren't nearly naked enough, nor were we retro, fabulous, or in possession of the thigh sweat of five men. You know how hard it is to find thigh sweat in New York? Embarrassingly hard.

· "Four Rooms" (1995) (imdb.com)