“Lost and Found” Has A Rom-Com Outside, Chewy Porno Center

We gushed about "Lost and Found" when the trailer came out, but now that it's finally in stores, we get to celebrate all over again: Allie Haze! Romance! A cute puppy! Hardcore action with a heart!

Xander Corvus has a huge crush on his cute neighbor, Allie Haze, but he doesn't know how to connect with her. One day her dog ends up in Xander's backyard and she thinks it's gone missing. Based on the stony advice of Chad Alva and Kimberly Kane, Xander takes this opportunity to hide the dog and spend all of his time fruitlessly searching for the puppy with Allie. Hilarity, love, remorse, and sex all ensue

Ok, so as floyd-fan already pointed out, this is remarkably close to the 1999 David Spade/Sophie Marceau movie "Lost & Found," but we don't really want to call it a parody. Maybe this is the birth of homage porn? That has a nice ring to it.

Anyhow, we're focusing too much on the adorable and not enough on the arousing. Xander doesn't spend the whole movie pining after Allie; he also has a one night stand with Zoe Voss that's as sexually thrilling as it is emotionally unfulfilling. All he really wants is to roll around in Allie's soft sheets, nibble her ear lobes, spoon her, and kiss up and down her neck. Of course, there's raucous, headboard-banging sex that keeps to the usual New Sensations standard of smut, but it's tempered with smiles and smooches.

Chad and Kimberly get busy as well, even though they never seem to leave the couch, put on clothing, or stop playing PlayStation. We'd call them potheads, but potheads can't tear up the living room with the passion that these two possess. In fact, it seems like Lexi Belle and Tony de Sergio have a slower, stonier screw than their co-stars. Maybe it's just their droopy eyes and the way Lexi wraps her feet around Tony's back, but these two seem almost too chill.

But it's cool by us! "Lost and Found" streets today thanks to New Sensations and director Eddie Powell, and there's a copy of it sitting in our office this very moment. We never thought we'd have to say this, but no animals were harmed in the making of this porn.

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Allie Haze and Xander Corvus
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Allie Haze and Xander Corvus
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Allie Haze and Xander Corvus
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Allie Haze and Xander Corvus
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Allie Haze and Xander Corvus
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Allie Haze, Lexi Belle, and Tony De Sergio
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Lexi Belle and Allie Haze
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Lexi Belle and Allie Haze
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Lexi Belle and Tony De Sergio
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Lexi Belle and Tony De Sergio
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Lexi Belle and Tony De Sergio
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Chad Alva and Kimberly Kane
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Allie Haze and Xander Corvus
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Allie Haze and Xander Corvus
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Kimberly Kane, Chad Alva, and Xander Corvus
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Zoe Voss and Xander Corvus
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Kimberly Kane and Chad Alva
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Kimberly Kane and Chad Alva
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Zoe Voss and Xander Corvus
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Allie Haze and Xander Corvus
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Allie Haze and Xander Corvus
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Allie Haze and Xander Corvus
New Sensations (newsensations.com)
Buy "Lost and Found" (store.fleshbot.com)