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Grab A Handful: Ten Years Of Teen Movie Nudity

PORNSTARS

Grab A Handful: Ten Years Of Teen Movie NudityAs the decades trudge by and the average life-expectancy slowly grows, people can feel like teenagers whether they're 18 or 81 (as long as they're legal). So we're examining ten films that skirt childishness with adult situations. Enjoy!

Random, goofy nudity in teen/young adult movies is no new phenomenon; this is perhaps why it's so fun to watch. It's a genre aimed at people in their most formative years, and it's always exciting (or slightly disturbing) to find that what was sexy in the 1980s is still sexy today.

In addition, since teen films are overwhelmingly focused on sex and the mysteries surrounding it, they have no problem blending awkwardness, fear, and humor into genuinely arousing moments (better than any parody porn can). We're probably giving the genre too much credit, but regardless, these movies will be remembered as mainstream fap material for years to come.


2000: Road Trip
"Road Trip" seemed to ride in on the tide of "American Pie" enthusiasm, and this scene especially bears a thematic resemblance to the late 1990s masterpiece. For example: there's a young man gingerly trying his chances with a more experienced, dominant woman; there's a video camera recording the encounter; it's slightly giggly in the room. The fact that Tom Green plays a major role in this movie shows that the filmmakers tried to cram as many cool things into the mix as they possibly could. As always, boobs were deemed cool enough.

· "Road Trip" (2000) (imdb.com)
· Road Trip (celebcap.net)


2001: American Pie 2
The franchise was still in theaters and people were invested (maybe?) in the characters in their lives. The reasonable success of these films showed that teen movies didn't have to be shallow and inane, they could be trilogies with overarching plot points.

· "American Pie 2" (2001) (imdb.com)
· American Pie 2 (celebcap.net)


2002: 40 Days and 40 Nights
People might wonder why this made this cut and not "Van Wilder," which more closely fits the teen movie mold. Well, to be honest, there's just something so awesome about Shannyn Sossamon getting off on an orchid that we couldn't resist.

On another level, it's interesting to think about how "40 Days and 40 Nights" satisfies the teen movie obsession with sex by having its main character try to escape it in all forms (even masturbation!).

· "40 Days and 40 Nights" (2002) (imdb.com)
· 40 Days and 40 Nights (celebcap.net)


2003: Old School
Yeah, it's pretty cool when old people say things like "What up, dawg?" but it's even cooler when they (almost) wrestle topless chicks in the basement of a frat house. This movie really supports the idea that anyone, no matter how old, can join in the senseless sexual romps of the youthful.

· "Old School" (2003) (imdb.com)
· Old School (celebcap.net)


2004: Cruel Intentions 3
We couldn't leave out some direct-to-video movies. "Cruel Intentions" starred some big names, and it was manipulative, evil, and plain ol' sexy. This sequel (which we honestly didn't hear about until we started the research for this post) is none of those things. Like the countless other teen films that never saw the inside of a cineplex, "Cruel Intentions 3" shows that you can just put softcore porn in a box and sell it.

· "Cruel Intentions 3" (2004) (imdb.com)
· Cruel Intentions 3 (celebcap.net)


2005: Hostel
Although it's not the first spawn of the beast that is gore-porn, "Hostel" did considerably better than Eli Roth's earlier production, "Cabin Fever." The movie really took its sweet time, drawing you in to Amsterdam and Slovakia with drugs and sex and flirting in a creepy hostel. Then when you least (most?) expect it, horrible things happen. If you got rid of everything after this scene, had a soundtrack by Blink 182, and made the foreign guy slightly more foreign, this could easily be any teen comedy.

· "Hostel" (2005) (imdb.com)
· Scene From Hostel (metacafe.com)


2006: Alpha Dog
Even when the nudity is sexless and full of anxiety, Olivia Wilde still makes for good watching. Although the movie has a permanent air of criminal menace (and Justin Timberlake, don't forget about him), it fits sex in seamlessly. Kidnappers, drug lords, and accomplices: they all need a little release sometimes.

· "Alpha Dog" (2006) (imdb.com)
· Alpha Dog (celebcap.net)


2007: Cougar Club
"Cougar Club" is about two college grads trying to set up a venue for the MILFs to mingle with young boys. Heavy hitters like Carrie Fisher and Faye Dunaway play a couple of the mature maidens, and they even get busy on screen. Unfortunately, even though America's MILF obsession is running strong, we still only have mainstream nudity from the young crowd. We were really hoping for a Carrie Fisher outtake on the Unrated set.

· "Cougar Club" (2007) (imdb.com)
· Cougar Club (celebcap.net)


2008: Role Models
In many ways, this doesn't really seem like a teen movie (truth be told, Wikipedia called it one) since it deals with adults learning to be mature enough to mentor children. But you know what? Seann William Scott played Stifler too many times to be anything else than a teen movie star. We could go watch him act in Shakespearean dinner theater fifty years from now, and we'd just wonder why "American Pie 40" was so low-budget.

· "Role Models" (2008) (imdb.com)
· Role Models (celebcap.net)


2009: The Final Destination
The fact that the most obnoxious character dies within minutes of completing a neurotic, selfish booty call really says a lot about the future of teen movies, and the responsibility filmmakers have to show positive sex acts to the public. We can only hope that this signals a bright future for the genre. Perhaps as its pioneers get older, we'll start seeing more films about teenagers discovering the anxious joys of sex well into their golden years (40 Year-Old Virgin, anyone?).

Or maybe every movie will have an obligatory nude scene and the world will be a better place.

· "The Final Destination" (2009) (imdb.com)
· The Final Destination (celebcap.net)


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