I Saw Stella Fucking Santa Claus

We don't know exactly where "Dirty Santa" was filmed, but we want to go there and spend our Christmas vacation lolling about on chaises lounges with Private vixens unwrapping our presents.

Private's Christmas special features all manner of holiday festivities, every single one of which looks ordeurs des magnitudes more appealing than spending the holidays fending off ancient aunts and boozy uncles, unwrapping socks and braving the highways in Yuletide traffic. We would much rather have Stella Delcroix and her helpful elves fulfilling our holiday wishes, thank you very much.

If that's the North Pole, then we are an office full of monkey's uncles, but screw the white Christmas—it might be time for a tropical tradition.

· Privatre Films (www.Private.com)
· Buy "Dirty Santa" (gamelink.com)