Marital Aid Test Kitchen: The Cloud 9 Vibrator

The Cloud 9 vibrator may not be the prettiest sex toy specimen around (to me, at least, it looks like an alien member)—but its silky touch was more than enough to persuade me to give it a go.

Made of a velvety hard plastic, the bumpy toy feels sleek against the skin—always a nice sensation. With its arched head, it's perfectly positioned to rub up against a girl's gspot; the small bumps lining the top of the head feel great when they come into contact with the, ahem, outer areas.

But I found myself wanting to feel the whole toy inside me—and, alas, here is where I was stymied. It looked like it should go in just fine, but whenever I attempted this feat, I found myself out of luck. More persistent (or more flexible) penetrators may have more success with this than I did (and if you do, please report back).

And what, you ask, about the vibration part of this vibrator? In terms of intensity, this is a mid-range toy: it's no powerhouse, but it's charged enough to make an impression. Depending on your mood, you can increase or decrease the vibration by turning the dial at the base of the toy. (Don't be expecting any fancy pulse patterns, though—this is a strictly entry-level toy.)

I wouldn't say that the Cloud 9 took me to Cloud 9—but I did get somewhere in the range of Cloud 7 (and maybe even 7.5!). Not the best marital aid known to man; but then again, at a mere twenty bucks, it offers up a pretty respectable experience.

· Buy the Cloud 9 (babeland.com)