Marital Aid Test Kitchen: Your Weekend In Vibrating Pussies And Asses

You know that feeling when you've got your barely-legal, barefoot and tippy-toed, cornfed and eager Mormon spouse by the ass? (You do? Awesome.) Well, like Matt Hooper said, I've got that beat. We've got a loveseat full of Cyberskin pussies and asses here at Fleshbot West. Can you identify them?

The fucking of a vibrating Cyberskin pussy and ass (not to be confused with "The Taking of Pelham 123," unless "Pelham 123" is your new dorm shorthand for pussy and ass, which it should be) isn't a light affair. In fact, some of these items are downright heavy.

Bree Olson's Cyberskin Doggy Style Vibrating Pussy & Ass, for example, weighs about 600 lbs. The idea is that, after you're done doing it doggy-style, you crawl into it and start a new life.

Olson's parts are the biggest of this collection, even bigger than those of April Flores, which tells you that Cyberskin reality is different from yours and mine.

The Cyberskin world also ascribes different value to the angle by which one enters. You'll notice that Olson and Roxy Reynolds are doggy-style marital aids and take up the most real estate, whereas Flores and the Unknown Vagina look petite and dainty by comparison.

That leaves us with Nautica Thorn's "Jackhammer" girljunk. Her ankles are floating near her ears in this pose, and you are meant to jackhammer her on a table or similar surface. In contrast to the other vaginas presented, it looks like her vag is trying to get away. Better catch it!

Each of these items is solid, malleable and, if you leave them in the sun long enough, deliciously sweaty. Keep that in mind when you bring them upstairs to meet your mom.

· Topco (topcosales.us)
· Buy Bree Olson's CyberSkin Doggy Style Vibrating Pussy and Ass (gamelink.com)
· Buy April Flores' CyberSkin Voluptuous Pussy (gamelink.com)
· Does Cyberskin April Flores dream of electric sheep? (gramponante.us)
· Buy Nautica Thorn's Jackhammer Pussy and Ass (sensualadvisor.com)
· Buy Roxy Reynolds' CyberSkin Pussy and Ass (forbiddenerotics.com)