Fight The “Topless” Menace, Win Free Porn

We've officially had enough: we're sick of magazines, websites, and random whoevers oohing and ahing about "topless" (or, worse yet, "naked") photos that don't even show the barest hint of nip. And we're taking action.

How, you ask? Why, with a good old fashioned contest! As per the suggestion of EdwardCaballa, we're encouraging you all to come up with a brand new word to describe this tease—one which, once it's been settled on, we'll put into very heavy rotation (the better to fight the "topless" menace, right?). But that's not all: in addition to gaining immortality with your valuable addition to the English language, you'll also win some free porn—the kind with real nudity in it, even!

Want to enter the contest? Just put your suggestion in the comments of this post. We'll pick out our favorite entries, and let you, the people, vote for the winner next week.

· Thumbnail star: Not actually topless Angelique Boyer