Minnie Mouse Maliciously Mauled

You just can't take grandpa anywhere anymore. And by "grandpa," we don't mean Ryan Seacrest. Fooled you for a second, right?

Apparently, a 60-year-old man was arrested, brought to trial and found guilty of goosing Minnie Mouse at Disney World. Yes, with his grandkids watching, he grabbed Minnie's titties right before someone snapped a photo and then, just for good measure, squeezed her ass. If the defendant, Mr. John Moyer, is a furry, does that mean he's being persecuted on basis of sexual orientation? If Minnie cannot speak, does that mean her right to say "no" is considered null and void? Or is it considered null and void because she's a mouse?

We concede, he was very wrong. We wouldn't want someone's grandpa coming to our job and feeling us up either.

*****

· Man Sentenced For Groping Minnie Mouse! (thefrisky.com)
· Thumbnail via Best Week Ever | VH1 Official Site (bestweekever.tv)