“The AJ Bailey Experiment”: Safe For Humans!

September 9, 2009
LANK

If you're like me (and you are—look at what you're wearing!), most porn star marketing makes them seem less sexy. That is why I chose to watch "World's Smartest Porn Star" AJ Bailey's first scene without sound.

Well, I considered it. So many of our nation's finest porn performers are innocent victims of their company's P.R. machines, and the person I talked with earlier this year seemed like she'd be a little embarrassed by being called The World's Smartest Porn Star. So I didn't want to watch a movie where suddenly a grown woman was talking with the vocal fry of an overmodulated Britney Spears and awkwardly sticking her finger in her mouth.

Luckily this doesn't happen in Vivid's "A.J. Bailey Experiment." Instead, the dangerously tall and unassuming Bailey patiently explains to us that what we are about to see is her first boy/girl scene and after it's done, naked, she explains to us how she felt about it.

There seems to be no posturing whatsoever, and as such the scene with Alex Gonz is much more accessible and real, such as that goes, than most other porn scenes (not saying that the veterans-by-comparison Lexi Belle, Phoenix Marie, and Kagney Linn Karter aren't delightful to watch in all their practiced moves, but it's fun to watch Bailey being surprised).

Watch Bailey get cock-slapped in the boob by Evan Stone! See her ogle the lush Phoenix Marie as the latter is railed by Billy Glide! Imagine being those lucky downtown L.A. warehouse walls as they supported the sweaty strivings of four blondes in two days!

The "World's Smartest" label backfires because it does both Bailey and every other performer a disservice. And how do you prove that, anyway? It is not in evidence in her scene, thank God, where spooling through her declensions would be pretty unsexy.

We would be happy to contextualize Bailey as a striking blonde from Missouri who is taller than Kagney Linn Karter.