Marital Aid Test Kitchen: Beer Goggles And Getting It In The Hiney Can

How often have we had sex while drunk? 10 million times? And when are we going to realize that a flesh and blood partner is but a drab, complaining substitute for that beer can we can't seem to disengage from?

Enter the Hiney Can. Literally. From either end!.

This ingenious product features a "Fanta Flesh" vagina on one end and an anus on the other, stuffed into a tube that resembles a Heineken can. Until now, I don't think a mere marital aid has ever trumped the experience of making the sex with a real human, but you have to admit that the Hiney Can eliminates the middle woman, until the expression "too drunk to fuck" loses all meaning and disappears up itself; you are fucking Drunk Incarnate.

Get me a fuckable Jagermeister bottle and Heidi Fleiss a fuckable meth lab and we are never leaving Nevada again.

· Hiney Can (tengashop.com)