In light of Heavy Rain's full frontal surprise, we're taking a look at some of the games that have us flicking a different kind of joystick.
After all, the violence of video games is well accepted and (more or less) ubiquitous. However, anything sensual or sexual from a major game developer immediately sparks controversy. Does that make the video game playing crowd prudish? Of course not! There are enough user-made nude patches and hacks to cover every console in a flesh-colored haze of jiggly fun. Anyhow, please enjoy our (non-exhaustive) gallery of graphic graphics.
· Thumbnail pic via Destructoid (destructoid.com)
Tomb Raider
Minutes after Tomb Raider hit the shelves, someone had dreamed up a patch to remove Lara Croft's clothing. Since the dawn of the franchise, Eidos has been hunting down the "Nude Raider" patch in an attempt to keep their heroine's grave-robbing dignity intact. Sorry, Eidos. Nothing gets in the way of our love affair with Lara.
· Above, Ms. Croft in Tomb Raider II (opensorcery.net). Below, her better-rendered boobs in Tomb Raider Anniversary (tomb-raider-anniversary.com)
Half-Life 2
Tired of actionless, plot-developing cutscenes? Throw some nudity in there! Code crafters made a nude patch (surprise!) for Half-Life 2 that strips the sexy Alyx Vance of her sweatshirt. After all, since the dreaded Combine have a suppression field that diminishes the urge to procreate, no one will mind Alyx's liberation. But when you're trying to save the world from a mess of evil transdimensional beings, it's nice to be visually certain who the humans are.
· Alyx Nude Patch (sexyandfunny.com)
God of War
As far as we know, every game in the God of War series has a hidden minigame where Kratos gets to bed multiple ancient hotties at once. You seldom get to see any goods—and you never see the actual act—but the noises are good enough that we don't even mind. We're happy the developers take the time to put these in (although they cut corners with the whole fighting grunts = fucking grunts tactic), but we're worried that some players are going to think of sex as a series of quicktime button commands.
· Watch the clip at God of War II Sex Minigame (gametrailers.com)
Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
No video game sex list would be complete without brief mention of the Hot Coffee scandal that had parents and politicians foaming at the mouth. In case you hadn't heard, Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas had a hidden bit of code that—with the right hack—allowed players to complete a successful date with a sex minigame. It was slightly more difficult (and far more explicit) than the clandestine sex in God of War, but all in all, overblown. If you want to see it, it's over here.
· Hot Coffee (spike.com)
BMX XXX
Are you surprised that a video game with XXX in its title has nudity? Not only do you get boobie BMX babes, but you also get a series of random, live-action striptease videos from a nightclub called Scores. It's not like we need our nudity to make sense, but some context would be nice. Then again, we've tried a lot of different ways to get people naked, but we have yet to try undressing girls with the power of BMX.
· IGN: BMX XXX (cube.ign.com)
Indigo Prophecy (also known as) Fahrenheit
On the eve of the final battle with the Clans (whatever that means), Carla and Lucas share a romantic love scene that requires no mods or patches on the part of the pervy gaming community. It's just a healthy, anxiety ridding expression of two individuals' affection for each other. How do we know it's healthy? Easy! Their Mental Health meters go up (note: Carla seems to have a better time than Lucas).
· Romantic Scene from Indigo Prophecy (youtube.com)
Max Payne 2
We feel for Max Payne, we really do. Crazed drug addicts murdered his family, all of his allies are being paid to kill him, and he's stuck in a graphic novel for most of his life. It's a good thing his love interest, Mona, takes over for a few levels. It's an even better thing that someone designed a nude skin to take advantage of Mona's breast physics. More bullet time, please!
· Watch the video at NSFW Nude Mona (gametrailers.com)
The Sims 3
We remember booting up the original Sims on Windows 98, designing a family, and waiting for the lady of our sim-mansion to take a shower so we could pause the game, enter a ton of cheat codes, and sell the shower while she was in it, thus revealing the naked washing animation in all it's curvy glory. Fortunately, the process seems to be easier with subsequent games of The Sims. Still, we hope you like your women like Barbie dolls.
· Sims 3 sex - depravity uncensored (youtube.com)
No More Heroes 2
Ah yes, there's nothing like a save glitch to make you question the intentions of game developers. In the previous game, Travis spared Shinobu's life. Now she wants to assist him, and she refers to him as "Master." He turns down her advances because he claims to feel like "a pervy teacher in a porn." We generally don't have a problem feeling that way.
· NO MORE HEROES 2 Shinobu save glitch (youtube.com)
Saboteur
When you purchase a copy of The Saboteur, you receive a golden ticket with a special code that liberates every pastie-covered nipple in the game (and believe us, there are quite a few). So when you need a break from liberating Paris from the Nazis, head on over to the brothel for a little burlesque show. You certainly won't be disappointed.
· Watch the clip at The Saboteur's naked, saucy, boob-filled dancing (destructoid.com)