Ain’t That America: “My Wife For Porn 3”

We know this gem is an amateur porn tape because there's neither the budget nor the political will to remove the American flag propped up between the ratty sectionals, and the dude didn't think to throw his shoes off camera.

Each of these little masterpieces reflects something deep in the American spirit: In a democracy, everyone can make porn who has a willing spouse.

Of course, America isn't a true democracy.

That is why we get these four pieces of outsider genius, each (I'm sure) with all the requisite paperwork checking out.

The first is the most professional, and it is just as likely that that's where the flag is kept as it is that the flag is obscuring a big patch of mold or the meth outflow pipe.

The second, I think, features either Milli or Vanilli.

The third scene is even weirder. An actual 80's-style amateur porn scene, the cameraman occasionally breaks the fourth wall and focuses on an older, naked man being serviced by a similarly disaffected dowager.

Don't trust the July 2010 production date on this treasure trove; there's some serious videotape warble in it, but it is glorious and creepy throughout.

· Buy "My Wife for Porn 3" (jerkoffzone.com)