Get The “Inside Story” On Bluebird’s Retro Flop

This is one jitterbug you just can't jizz to. The pubic hair isn't era-appropriate at all! However, we were pleasantly surprised by the jazz and rockabilly jams that permeate the sex scenes.

Inside Story

Studio: Bluebird Films
Director: Marc Twain
Cast: Linsey Dawn McKenzie, April O'Neil, Asa Akira, Ashlyn Rae, Avy Scott, Celeste Star, Dylan Ryder Gemma Massey, Isis Love, Krissy Lynn, Madelyn Marie, Mallory Rae Murphy, Rocco Reed, Anthony Rosano, Chris Johnson, Tommy Gunn, Tony De Sergio, Yurizan Beltran (non-sex)

Here's the quick version: Superstar reporter Linsey Dawn McKenzie wants to do a big story on a secret sex society run by mob boss Tony Fatelli, but her boss, Rocco Reed, won't let it. Fortunately, Asa Akira convinces him (with her pussy) what a great story Linsey will write. With that, Linsey goes off into the world, eating girls out and watching people around her have penetrative sex until she reaches the upper echelon of the secret sex society, where she munches on another girl, takes a photo, and gets her story.

At first, it felt like "Inside Story" was on the right track. Steamy times in the fast paced world of journalism! Poor acting overshadowed by sexual tension! Asa sucking cock to a relaxed jazz track! And then it all goes downhill from there. I really thought that watching Asa slurp her spit off the tip of Rocco's cock was a sign of good things to come, but the only good come was the load deposited in Asa's bellybutton.

Linsey meets her informant, Yurizan Beltran, in front of a green screen in the park, they chat for a few moments, and then Yurizan leaves. It was amusing seeing her voluptuous body crammed into some retro duds, but the scene was otherwise a waste.

Yurizan directs her to a diner set up as a front by Tony Fatelli, where she witnesses the chef (Tommy Gunn) serve a hot hunk of meat to Krissy Lynn and Isis Love. All of a sudden, Gemma Massey rolls up on her skates and bares her boobs for Linsey. In usual Bluebird fashion, there lovers stay in their contained cells and the camera flits back and forth between them: an exciting threesome in the booth and some lackluster 69ing on the counter.

Linsey meets another informant, Celeste Star, to ask about Fatelli, but she isn't as willing to talk. The girls eat each other out in the back of Linsey's convertible before whipping out dildos to divulge the treasures of Celeste's juicy sleuthing. We love watching Celeste because she knows exactly what she wants and how to get it, directing her co-stars just enough to be considerate yet not enough to be overbearing. However, it seems like Linsey needs a lot of help, and she clearly hurts Celeste at one point by jamming a (rather pointy) vibrator in her pussy too fast/at the wrong angle.

Pussy injured or not, Celeste tells Linsey that Fatelli gives girls plastic surgery to make them look like famous stars, get them jobs, and fuck them. What's this? A cool idea popping out? Something bizarre and sinister and original? It doesn't really go anywhere. Linsey pretends to be a wannabe celebrity, she drives to Fatelli's joint, and talks to a Marilyn Monroe lookalike (Avy Scott doesn't really fit the role, but oh well). Later, Linsey spies through the window on Marilyn popping her toes inside Elizabeth Taylor's pussy (that is, Dylan Ryder's pussy) while James Dean fucks Carmen Miranda (Chris Johnson fucks Madelyn Marie).

Linsey returns to the house at night for a party, but she only finds Anthony Rosano and Tony De Sergio about to bone three willing babes. Under interrogation, Linsey insists that she's there to become a celebrity, so they give her to April O'Neil while they share (actually share!) Ashlyn Rae and Mallory Rae Murphy. It was nice to see some genuine partner swapping in a Bluebird production, but it actually made for more confusion than variety. Worse, April and Linsey ran out of things to do with each other, and they spend a chunk of their time looking at the director and being told to get out of the way.

So there you have it: a bunch of stylized sex surrounded by a murky, half-developed plot, driven by a woman who is too dull of an actress to excuse her poor clit-licking. Honestly, why did they give her the lead role? I understand that she's significantly more of a celebrity in England, but there must be dozens of other WAGs with more dramatic talent, pussy-eating prowess, and/or willingness to up the hardcore ante.

If nothing else, the ‘50s porn idea is on the money. Let this be the new trend: historical porno-dramas with no plot, five distinct scenes where fake celebrities of yesteryear plow each other in the sexual positions of today, and lots of gentle, era-appropriate music. Thanks for paving the way, Bluebird!

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Madelyn Marie
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Madelyn Marie
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April O'Neil
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Asa Akira
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Asa Akira
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Asa Akira
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Ashlyn Rae
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Celeste Star
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Dylan Ryder
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Gemma Massey
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Isis Love
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Isis Love and Krissy Lynn
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Isis Love and Krissy Lynn
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Katie
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Krissy Lynn
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Lindsey Dawn McKenzie and Gemma Massey
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Mallory Rae Murphy
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Mallory Rae Murphy and Ashlyn Rae
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