Man Spontaneously Combusts While Watching Porn

Nobody knows how it happened, but a San Francisco man walked into a sex shop, sat down to watch some porn, and later came barreling out of his booth completely engulfed in flames. What the hell was he watching?

If we might digress for a moment, the NY Daily News calls the man a "porn junkie," and we think that's uncalled for. Not only is the term "junkie" offensive to those of us who enjoy pornography on a regular basis, but the victim was watching smut in a booth in a sex shop! Real junkie behavior is watching the stuff while sitting in front of your computer, alone, all day. (Ahem.)

Anyway, dear Fleshbot readers, we're dying to get your thoughts on this. What could he have been watching? Why did he suddenly burst into flames? Could it have been that the gentleman was masturbating so furiously that he sparks came off his crotch? Is this another sign of the Apocalypse? We're scared. Hold us.

· News via NY Daily News (nydailynews.com)
· Thumbnail star, Jada Fire (see what we did there?) via Penthouse (galleries.penthouse.com)