Oh Look, Phil Varone Has A Sex Tape

If you're anything like us, your first thought is, "Who the fuck is Phil Varone?" Then, upon googling him and seeing that he was a drummer for Saigon Kick, Skid Row, and Prunella Scales, your next thought is probably, "Those are bands, now?"

Then, as you're reading further down his Wikipedia page, you'll learn that—among other things—Mr. Varone appeared on "Sex Rehab with Dr. Drew," which may make you feel mildly uncomfortable about the fact that he now has a sex tape. But whatever! Morals are for jerks! Just remember: this is totally cool, because Phil Varone is like the Tommy Lee of porn...you know, if Tommy Lee hadn't already made a porno.

· Phil Varone's Secret Sex Stash* (philvaronessecretsexstash.com)

[*No, seriously, that's what it's called. No one tell Mr. Varone that it's not a secret if you sell it to Vivid and have them publicize it.]