Marital Aid Test Kitchen: The Bodywand (Original, Rechargeable & Mini)

When searching for the perfect vibrator, one can feel like Goldilocks in the big woods. Too big, too small, too hot, too cold. Well, luckily Bodywand has three choices of varying size and style to try out.

I'll start with the Bodywand Mini Massager. This little thing is just as cute as a(n erotically stimulating) button. It's pink and bedecked with tiny jewels around the base, i.e. very girly, but its deceptively powerful tiny motor makes it a perfect little package.

To turn the Mini Massager on, you simply swivel the base. If it's turned as far as possible, it's at the maximum vibration (which is pretty damn strong). If you prefer a milder speed, as you turn the base back towards the off position it has two stop-off points along the way that descend in vibration intensity. The head of the wand is very flexible, so it's easy to maintain clitoral contact no matter which position your hand is in — this makes it great as a during-sex accompaniment.

Really the only downside is the Mini Massager takes FOUR LR44 button batteries. I guarantee I will use the heck out of this little guy until the batteries run out, at which point I imagine my trip to the specialty battery department will be a long time coming. Maybe these aren't that hard to find, but they're definitely not as convenient as the 24-packs of AAs Santa puts in my Christmas stocking every year.

Onto the Rechargeable Massager. This one is about twice the height and girth of the Mini, and comes with multiple massage modes as well as a sweet pink carrying case. It can be used while it's charging, and 30 minutes of charge should equal an hour of enjoyment.

This vibrator did get the job done, but it was actually quite a challenge. Now through the years I've come to learn my way around a vibrator pretty well, but I could not for the life of me get acclimated to this one-finger-use control dial. I'm not the biggest "mode" girl, so I was simply seeking to experiment with the modes then just crank 'er up all the way. However, there are different modes at different points along the dial's path, and upon trying to find my way back to "all the way", I got hopelessly lost in a land of all modes. I'm sure eventually one can learn this dial's subtleties and secrets, but during my first-time session, I could not.

Now for the Original Massager, the strong and straightforward archetypal vibe. This is big, powerful, and plugs in, so you know it's ready to go. And I didn't find any modes to speak of, just a dial to crank from 0 to almost clit-scorching in a matter of milliseconds.

The thing is nearly an arm's length, so it's not the most discreet of the bunch (especially coupled with its cord). But I must say, if you're just looking to get to the point without any bells and whistles, this is a great candidate for the job. And it's sizeable enough that you really could use it to massage other parts of the body (neck, shoulders, back) were you so inclined. Overall a very solid massage experience.

The moral of the story? Sometimes the big and the small can be juuuust right.

· The Bodywand (thebodywand.com)