“High Heels And Panties” Appeal To The Better Angles Of Our Nature

September 19, 2011
GRAM-PONANTE

As 99 percent of all porn movies feature both high heels and panties, the particular appeal of this endeavor involves the camera angle and the fact that none of the panties were in the 5 for $10 pile at Caldor.

Watch as Khloe Kush prepares for her scene with Nacho Vidal. It's a strenuous job: she must steady herself on a door handle while the cameraman slides under her, getting her breasts, her panties, and her heels. Then she rocks back and forth on the floor so that we can see everything the title promises.

When Vidal comes in, he must fuck Kush but take care to not fuck her panties off. Otherwise porn consumers would rise up and revolt, as they do whenever a MILF movie is released featuring a woman who has not actually borne children or who I, personally, would not like to fuck, thus contradicting the acronym.

Kudos to Kush and Vidal for not shortchanging the audience.

This movie was a voyage of discovery for me, too: The title made me think of the Outlaws' 1977 hit "Green Grass And High Class Forever." I Googled the song to find that the title is actually "Green Grass And High Tides." Then I realized that Caldor went out of business, like, last century.

Damn! How many major life decisions have I made based on my inaccurate interpretation of those lyrics? I definitely wouldn't have run for Congress, for one.

I'll take a moment to thank you for reading this whole post and not trying to correct "angles" into "angels," by the way. It means a lot.

· Digital Sin (digitalsin.com)
· Buy "High Heels And Panties" (tlavideo.com)