You’re Never Fully Dressed Without Come On Your Face

Things were simpler when I was a teen. Her mother was horrified that my naturally beautiful prom date had applied a little blush and lipstick. "At least her face isn't covered in, like, 200 loads," I didn't say.

I guess I meet a different class of lady now.

A female friend asked me to make her a porn care package and I quickly put together a box of gauzy Wicked and lesser-cousin Sweet Sinner videos. "It's for couples," I whispered.

"No," she said, "I want people getting sweaty and messy. I want porny girls getting their makeup smeared, no fucking talking, just BAM, in and out."

She said this with such a twinkle in her eye that I wanted to ask her to go off the Mormon reservation with me.

Anyway, imagine my joy when I opened the latest box from JM Productions to find "Teen Face," with (no longer a teen) Sindee Jennings on the cover and a teddy bear announcing that 200 loads would be dropped on 200 teens who were "Young, Dumb, And Covered In Cum."

I admit that it was not as mesmerizing as I expected it to be, just watching a fast-forwarded series of graphic (eyes being held open, slurping come from a bowl) to wholesome (well, comparatively) facial cumshots without the benefit of seeing any of the other parts I tend to like on females (It was also difficult finding an image that wasn't too shocking for Fleshbot's front page) but I'm doing this for a friend.

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