Lad Mag Babes Bring Out The Big Guns

Get it? Because boobs are called guns, and they're also holding guns! We'd laugh, but the fact that we can say "guns" and you think "boobs" shows how deep rooted the military-lad mag complex is. You've never heard of the military-lag mag complex? It's sinister.

Eisenhower saw this kind of thing coming, and he warned us about letting our love of guns mesh with our love of curvy women, but we didn't listen! Look, we might talk about guns and boobs almost everyday, but we try to keep them separate in our hearts; it's difficult to do when Nuts Magazine puts out a bunch of pictures—not to mention the decks of playing cards—of Rosie Jones, Holly Peers, and India Reynolds holding scary weaponry. We want their protection! We're so confused right now.