A Dated Compliment For The Derriere: “Phat Ass White Booty 7”

We're not saying it's wrong to call a booty "phat," but it's not exactly something you hear these days. And when we hear "Phat Ass White Booty 7," we don't think of Phoenix Marie's gloriously round and poundable mound, we think of Chris Tucker in the '90s, and that guy does not have a nice butt.

While we're talking about the title, we should add that we love the use of the word "ass" as an instrument of embellishment. When did that become popular anyway? It's comforting to think that we all appreciate the butt so damn much that we can say things like, "Damn, Ron, that's one big ass tax refund," and "Honey, this was one tasty ass dinner."

Speaking of tasty ass dinners, let's dine with Prince Yahshua, who is just about to sit down to a delicious meal of Julie Cash's culo. His table manners are a little rough around the edges, but we can't really fault him for face planting in that posterior, especially when Julie's moans become breathy gasps every time his tongue pushes inside her ass. Yahshua drops his dick on Julie from above and it slides right into her wet pussy, just like they were made for each other. Gosh, perhaps they are made for each other.

If you had asked us to cast "Phat Ass White Booty 7," Ashli Orion would not have been on our shortlist, but here she is, showing her white booty, making us feel shame for not having remarked on her rump before. She's a tiny lady, but her butt is so plump! And lucky Prince Yahshua gets to stick his fat dick inside her tight ass, bringing--and this is what the box cover promises us--"rivers of ass juice from multiple anal orgasms." Rivers.

And then there's Phoenix Marie, whose name is synonymous with "Phat Ass White Booty." We must say, we like her brunette look a lot! And we guess Mr. Marcus likes it to, because he fucks her doggy style, as would a very proud hair dresser. All of the girls in this movie have spectacular asses, but honestly, no sight can compete with Phoenix balancing her back on a bar stool with her butt lifted high, her legs crossed, and her pussy being spread open by Marcus's thick cock. This is, like, everything you want in a butt-centric film.

All right, maybe your ideal butt porn includes a lot of oil, but come on, oil is practically cheating. These ladies don't need any additives to make "Phat Ass White Booty 7" shine!

· Jules Jordan (julesjordan.com)
· Buy "Phat Ass White Booty 7" (adultdvdempire.com)