Welcome To “Californication”: You Try To Pee On A Girl, You Get Punched

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We learned a lot about Hank last night. His wildest dream "involves a three-breasted midget with labia piercings and a desire to please," which is pretty cool. Also, if you're a Lars von Trier parody with a penchant for peeing on prostitutes, Hank will punch you in the face! Yes, he's a complex man. It's a complicated show! Fortunately, nice boobs are here to keep it simple.

So, while we're bummed that R. Kelly won't be making a cameo on the show any time soon (damn, that's a dated joke right there), it's still nice to see Hank sticking up for what he believes in. We don't know exactly what those beliefs are, but they produce crazy moments like these.

On a sad note: no Lizzie this week. We suppose four weeks of Camilla Luddington in a row is a bit much, but we had such high hopes!

· "Californication" (sho.com)