‘Tis A Merciless Mistress (Who Gleans The Biggest Boners)

She may rule with an iron fist... And if you're lucky, maybe she'll actually find one and stick it in you. Until then, though, you'll have to be led around like a dog, and if you get too loud she's got a ballgag in her back pocket. Hmm. We're not so sure she's merciless as much as appropriately prepared.

She's basically like a supermom, but instead of carrying a purse stuffed with candy and tissues she's got nipple clamps and collars. And instead of being outfitted in a polo shirt and practical khaki shorts, she's got full-body fishnets. And you don't even want to know what her time-out entails! Or, maybe we do...

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