We're bracing ourselves to consume copious amounts of caramel apples, fun-size candy bars, and razorblade-filled apples (wait, not that). But in preparation for that, we'll partake in something with negative calories: cunnilingus! Or at least a spirited cunnilingus should work off more than one takes in. Plus, pussies are tastier than Crunch bars, 5th Avenues, and arguably even Toblerone (ooh, fancy). So, though we're counting down to trick-or-treats, we'll be feasting in our own way all the while.
[Delve even further with Lilyanne and Max at Pornographic Love. Have a GIF you'd like to see us feature? Email us!]