Facefuls Of Cum Ahead!

No overindulgent gustatory revels or inappropriate imbibing can deflect us from our path. Yes, while raving masses may be trying to snag crazy deals for Black Friday, we're choosing to remain true to our bottom line: faces sparkling with jizz.

This holds more value for us than a million bargain George Foreman grills or cashmere-blend sock trios. Plus, waiting in line is such a bore. In the time some people spend lined up outside the big box stores, we could get, like, 40 facials. They might not be appropriate for gift-wrapping, but we think it heralds the season quite nicely nonetheless.

· Facial of my friend (xtube.com)