Hot Octopuss’s Pulse: A Vibrator For Him (And Also Her)

As a general rule, vibrators are seen as toys for women. Yes, men can--and do!--enjoy a little vibration, but you wouldn't know it from looking at the selection of sex toys geared towards men. Save for the Cobra Libre and Fleshlight Vibro, there haven't been that many vibrators specifically marketed towards men. But the UK's Hot Octopuss is hoping that their new toy, Pulse, will change that.

A sleek looking black sleeve made of hard plastic and silicone, Pulse wraps around the penis, offering the wearer some sexy stimulation through nine (9!) levels of vibration (or oscillation, according to Hot Octopuss's website). But Pulse isn't just for solo play: those that prefer to share their toys with a partner are in luck, as Pulse's underside is also equipped with a vibrator; one that's designed to be pressed against a woman's labia while her male partner enjoys stimulation within the sleeve.

It's a really neat idea, and one that I was super excited to see in action. The day Pulse arrived at the office, I grabbed a male friend and pulled him into the Fleshbot test kitchen. Here's what we discovered:

As a couple's toy. A few general notes about the Pulse before we get into couple's play specifics. First off: it is loud. Really, really loud, to an off putting degree. Secondly, it's rather bulky, which doesn't seem like a problem until you're trying to sexily maneuver it around a penis or between two bodies. And lastly, the port that the charging cable plugs into comes with a teeny, tiny bit of plastic to protect it from the elements when it's not plugged in--a teeny, tiny bit of plastic that fully detaches from the toy, and easily gets lost once it's removed. This last point may seem trivial, but it struck me as a significant symbol of Hot Octopuss's thoughts on design.

Of course, there are plenty of awesome sex toys that are bulky and loud, so I could have forgiven those issues pretty easily if the toy managed to blow my mind. Sadly, it did not. Wedged between my partner and myself, it felt like nothing so much as a giant, hard piece of plastic; and an awkward, uncomfortable one at that. And as for the vibration--well, that brought up another issue. Pulse only has one set of controls, so what's good for the gander had better be good for the goose. But while my partner wanted the toy cranked up to full blast, I found full throttle to be painful, and preferred a softer setting. As toy for two, the Pulse was a bust--but I still held hope that it might work well for a solo outing.

As a solo toy. Alas, once again, the Pulse didn't live up to its promise. Though my co-tester enjoyed the vibrations, the design showed itself to have some serious flaws. Once again, the toy's bulk proved cumbersome, making it unwieldy to maneuver. And though the operating manual claimed that the toy's petals would hug the penis in a tight grip, we didn't see that happen. Lastly, when it was time to turn it off, we discovered one more annoyance: when the toy is cranked up to the highest level of vibration, you have to lower the vibration a full nine times before the toy shuts off -- there's no way to directly turn it off with one simple button press.

I'm not going to lie: I was really bummed by the Pulse's performance. The concept of a vibrator designed for solo penis stimulation and heterosexual couples play held so much promise; but when it came down to it, the Pulse just didn't live up to its hype. With a few tweaks, the toy could be something really, really special, though. So let's all hope that Hot Octopuss has a less bulky, less noisy version in the works -- ideally one that has separate controls for the two different vibrating panels.

· Hot Octopuss (hotoctopuss.com)