Hannah Is Gonna Lick All The Frosting Off Your Donut

And Lucy is going to suck the seeds out of your strawberry. Or maybe it's the other way around? All we can see is a blur of red hair and gnashing teeth, and we don't know it's because they're aroused or famished or both. At least they're playing a game of topless tug of war with their teeth; that should solve every problem and leave our donuts nice and frosted.

But then our donuts will feel lonely! How sad our strawberries will be! God, it's like we can't win with these lad mag girls.

· Front TV (frontarmy.com)