For The Last Time, James Franco Did Not Fuck Lindsay Lohan

James Franco can be accused of a lot of things, but one thing everyone needs to stop accusing him of is fucking Lindsay Lohan. 

James wrote a new piece for his First Impressions column on Vice (link below), which nicely compliments the flagrant naval gazing he's done there in the past. Here he looks to set the record straight on Lindsay and himself. The truth, the simple truth, is that James simply read to Lindsay. 

In case you don't want to read the incessantly rambling narrative of his entire short story, which he titled "Bungalow 89," in which he takes more than a few diversions to Gus Van Sant's My Own Private Idaho, here are some of the best moments for you.

She knocked on the door. She was in her pajamas. She had bare feet.

Once upon a time a guy, a Hollywood guy, read some Salinger to a young woman who hadn’t read him before. Let’s call this girl Lindsay. She was a Hollywood girl, but a damaged one. I knew that she would like Salinger, because most young women do. 

...Now we were lying in bed. I wasn’t going to fuck her. She had her head on my shoulder. She started to talk. I let her.

...I ran my fingers through her hair and thought about this girl sleeping on my chest, our fictional Hollywood girl, Lindsay. What will she do? I hope she gets better.

...For nine months, while they fixed my house, I was staying in the bungalows. First in 82, next to the little Buddha in the long, trickling fountain. Lindsay Lohan was there too. The Chateau was her home, and the staff were her servants. She got my room key. One night she came in at 3 AM. I woke up on the couch, trying not to look surprised. Instead of fucking her, I read her a short story about a neglected daughter.

Alright, so I guess we can put this one to bed, just like Franco put Lindsay to bed that night he read her two of Salinger's Nine Stories, which is honestly a much more believable story. 

Via Vice