Morning Wood: Starring George Clooney as “Assistant Fleshbot Editor”

· Scarlett Johansson will star in Jenna Jameson's life story ... in the movie studio that so far exists only in Jenna Jameson's mind. Hey, but don't let that stop anyone from writing any misleading headlines and calling it news. (news.com.au)

· Eva Mendes worked hard to make her boobs grow for her role in the upcoming comic book movie Ghost Rider. Now that's what we call acting. (maximonline.com + toxicmagazine.com)

· This just in: Adultery is technically still a felony in Michigan. Oh, and it could also get you life in prison for first-degree criminal sexual conduct. So how's your marriage doing? (freep.com)

· Crime Stoppers tip #32: When driving a stolen car, allowing your female passenger to stand out of the sunroof with her shirt off is not considered "keeping a low profile." (citizen-times.com)

· A Swedish man could face five years in prison for stealing condoms in Thailand. His excuse: "I was drunk and needed condoms." Sounds like the best justification for a pardon we ever heard. (thelocal.se)

· A British newscaster has some trouble grasping the whole live TV thing, after sticking out her boobs, showing her bare stomach, and revealing a co-worker's affair over the air. Although we're sure that was news to some people. (metro.co.uk)

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Previously: Morning Wood Archives/Wet Spots Archives