Would You Like Some Tits With That Coffee?

Buckle up for this one kiddos, you're in for quite a ride. Authorities in Washington state have just shut down a chain of coffee stands and charged the owner, Carmela Panico, with prostitution. 

According to Vocativ (link below), Panico kept two sets of books, allowing her to pocket a nice chunk of change.

Prosecutors say that Carmela Panico, 52, acted as the madam of several drive-through brothels that allowed her to personally pocket more than $2 million in just three years. Meanwhile, the barely clad baristas who worked at her Java Juggs and Twin Peaks coffee huts banked as much as $30,000 a month by performing sex acts with customers.

One barista even told investigators that she earned more than a half-million dollars turning tricks at Panico’s bikini coffee stands. In charging papers, Snohomish County authorities were blunt. “Panico’s businesses were driven by prostitution and lewd behavior,” Deputy Prosecutor Bob Hendrix wrote.

Am I the only one that keeps reading Panico as Pacino? Now that's a business I could get behind. Al Pacino's Coffee With Extra Hoo-ah! My other favorite part of this is the name of the two establishments she was running: Java Juggs and Twin Peaks. It seriously took them three years to determine that a place called Java Juggs was a front for prostitution? Come on Washington state, you guys need to get it together. 

Via Vocativ