You know what they say: Sex is like pizza. Even when it's bad, it's good. Coincidentally, pizza tastes good both before and after sex. I imagine pizza tastes good during sex, and sex would make pizza taste even better while you're a thrustin'. The two clearly go great together, which got me thinking: If the gloriousness of sex and pizza are so similar, then positions PROBABLY correlate with flavors, right? (No? OK. Work with me here.)
Get ready. Because I matched them all up.
Simple, delicious. Difficult to fuck up.
Zing.
A better idea in theory.
How do we get from Point A to Point in as few steps as possible?
The ultimate delicious, DGAF topping. H8ers can h8.
Because everybody loves it, man.
Supes comfy. Supes easy. No one even has to know it happened.
??????
It's unexpected. It's like, "Woah, how did this happen?" And then it's really, really fucking good. (No pun intended.)
There's an ass in your face and you don't even have to move. It's winning the sexual lottery.
METAPHORS.
Prosciutto Arugula Hemp pizza is a four-course meal, not pizza, and the Passion Propeller is acrobatics, not sex.