From couples who've just tied the knot to wives who've turned to cuckoldry, sex at school and sex at work, and those who are touched (on video!) for the very first time, these are the lists that made your list. And so, with no further adieu, we'd like to offer you a peek at the most popular top ten lists of 2009. Dig in and enjoy, people—this is the cream of the crop.

10) When Hubby's Away: Top Ten Amateur Cheating Wives Videos

9) Rub-A-Dub-Dub: Top Ten Amateur Bath Sex Videos

8) Here Comes The Bride: Top Ten Amateur Honeymoon Videos

7) College Life 101: Top Ten Amateur Dorm Sex Videos

6) All Work And No Play: Top Ten Amateur Office Sex Videos

5) The Squirtin' Geyser Of Love: Top Ten Amateur Female Ejaculation Videos

4) Take It Like A Man: Top Ten Girl-On-Guy Strap On Sex Videos

3) Autumn Is Coming: Top Ten Amateur Outdoor Fall Sex Videos

2) No Boys Allowed: Top Ten Amateur Lesbian Sex Videos

1) Like A Virgin: Top Ten First Time Amateur Sex Videos

Yes, in 2009 you fell in love with Madison Young, Allyssa Hall, Faye Reagan, Georgia Jones...and a whole lot of public disgrace (you guys sure are kinky!). Let's relive 2009 with the gift that keeps on giving.

10) India Summer (Fucking Machines)

9) Allyssa Hall (Little Mutt)

8) Marie McCray (Public Disgrace)

7) Madison Young (Hustler College Girls)

6) Nikky (Nikky's Dreams)

5) Faye & Georgia (Beauty Is Divine)

4) Cecilia Vega (Public Disgrace)

3) Dominika (Hegre-Art)

2) Lea Lexis (Public Disgrace)

1) Elina (Met Models)

With hundreds of bite size selections of hardcore goodness featured on Fleshbot in 2009, it was a little hard to pick the best of the best—or would have been, if we hadn't had the help of a computer that told us which videos got the most views. So here they are: your ten favoritest flicks of '09. Get ready for a whole lot of horny amateurs...and, of course, Faye Reagan.

10) Girl Achieves Best Orgasm Ever

9) Hold On Tight

8) Yeah, This Video Is Making Us Miss Class Too

7) They Keep Going, And Going, And Going...

6) Quick, Easy, And Delicious

5) "Everybody Cums" When Faye Reagan's In The Picture

4) What Makes A Nerd?

3) Wish We Were There

2) It's Amateur Hour (And That's A Good Thing)

1) Shocking But True: Arty Porn That Gets Us Hot

As the year draws to a close, we've reviewed our reviews from 2009, and scientifically determined just which toys were the best of the best this year. Below, our picks for the tops in toys.

10) The Real Touch: With a few rare exceptions, high end (and high tech) sex toys are almost exclusively targeted at women. The Real Touch is looking to change that. A high tech masturbator that syncs with POV porn, the Real Touch may just change the face of toys for boys. True, it has its problems (most notably, the fact that it won't work if you're not paying per minute for AEBN's porn)—but it's promising enough to give us hope for the future.

9) OhMiBod Freestyle: After years on the scene, the OhMiBod has finally reached its full potential. With the Freestyle's wireless connection, you can finally rock out to your tunes without being tied down to them.

8) Tenth Anniversary Tristan Butt Plug: The Tenth Anniversary Tristan Plug takes a good thing and makes it better (or at least bigger). A beefed up version of the original Tristan plug, the 10th anniversary edition is a must have for any butt aficionado in need of an upgrade.

7) Bolero Straitjacket **BEST LUXURY TOY**: This delightful bondage device combines the efficient immobilization of the straitjacket with the delicious eroticism of being nearly naked. True, it's not cheap—but if you're willing and able to invest in your BDSM toy chest, it's an excellent addition.

6) Imperial: With 11 inches of aircraft quality spun aluminum, the Imperial is bound to please any and all size queens—especially the ones who enjoy toys with the ability to pleasure and violently disfigure.

5) Bloomy: A wonderful dildo for the girls, and a p-spot stimulating butt plug for the boys—Bloomy's a toy that everyone can enjoy! (Just, uh, remember to sterilize it before sharing.)

4) Finger Tingles **BEST BUY**: Since the day we first discovered sex, we've wondered whether there could ever be away to improve on the erotic abilities of the simple little finger. The answer, friends, is yes: with the help of the Finger Tingles, your mild-mannered digit becomes a super finger.

3) Contour Q **BEST DISCREET TOY**: Don't be fooled by Contour Q's innocent appearance: these bumpy little massage stones know their way around a woman's body. And we do mean all parts of the body.

2) Sqweel: With the Sqweel, Love Honey set out to create a toy that replicates the sensation of oral sex. While they may not have quite achieved that goal, they did create a wholly unique toy that stimulates in a very unusual (and very pleasing) way.

1) Form 2: Small, sleek, and super-powered: the rabbit-inspired Form 2 has two silicone ears that are all revved up and ready to rock. And just like a real rabbit, this thing won't quit until long after you're satisifed.

Worst Toy of 2009: The Blowguard: Sure, it'll enable you to give a decent blowjob with absolutely no effort...at the cost of your dignity, your comfort, and your ability to control your drooling.

January
We made our way to AVN... we laughed, we cried, we watched the Abby Winters girls make out.
Shay Laren bowled... in the nude!
British schoolchildren were somehow corrupted by seeing their teacher in a sexy ad.
Basshunter featured a former pornstar in his video... and was inspired to make some porn of his own.

February
Oh god, no—shield your eyes, it's the Gene Simmons sex tape.
Lindsay Lohan got nude. But it was art, so it was okay.
Sammy Braddy also got nude. It wasn't art, but that was more than okay.

March
Eliot Spitzer was outed as a john. Then we found out his call girl was a former girl gone wild. Then there was that sex tape that wasn't actually her. Ah, memories.
And speaking of sex tapes—remember those alleged Kristin Davis photos? And all those other dubious celebrity sex tapes?
In any case—you can't go wrong with "Cheerleaders."

April
OMG Dita Von Teese was a pornstar!
Stoya was totally "Video Nasty."
Did Marilyn Monroe have a sex tape? (Probably not.)
And Tristan helped us find the gspot.

May
Indiana Carolina Jones got down and dirty.
Daphne Rosen impressed us with her boobs. And the rest of her, too!
Would you like to have sex? Do you need to know how to do everything? Boy, do we have the book for you.
Sasha Grey: more than just a pretty face.

June
Genesis announced the 100 Hottest Pornstars. Most of you disagreed with them.
Pornstars will do many things.... but you probably shouldn't ask them to act.
Everyone loves a freckled girl (and our first ever Fleshbot Request!)

July
You know what Jesse Jane is? If you guessed sexy hot, you are so right.
Aussie pop star Jess Origliasso took her top off...
... and then Australia found out.

August
The Olympics happened. We ogled the athletes.
You know who else is sexy hot? Gabriella Fox.
And we sure do love it when celebrities take off their tops.

September
The Extreme Pornstar Showdown began, with Belladonna and Sasha Grey leading the charge.
Many celebrity nipples "slipped" out into the open.
And what better way to celebrate the Jewish New Year than with Jewish pornstars?

October
"Who's Nailin Paylin?" threatened to change life as we know it.
We said goodbye to John D.—and then to Dashiell, too. We're tearing up just thinking about it.
On the other hand... girls in their panties!

November
We elected a new leader—and an old one, too! All hail Stoya and Joanna Angel!
Can you believe Corrie Loftin posed naked? Cause, uh, we totally can.
Man, those celebrities sure like having sex. On tape, even.
Nothing says equality like a giant black cock in the face.

December
Stoya: our sexy hot extreme pornstar champion. (See why she's our Crush Object of the Year?)
We wrapped up a whole lot of things.
But there's no better way to close it all out than with a bunch of topless women skydiving.

"I'm lucky because I get to be me pretty much all the time," said Stoya from her home in Philadelphia, awaiting next week's trip to Las Vegas for the AVN Adult Entertainment Expo. "I came into the job being the person on the edge of the envelope, and I'm not doing anything too much different from who I am anyway."

Within that envelope are Jesse Jane and Riley Steele, each abundant and delightful in her own way but also more the Heartland's idea of pornic perfection.

Digital Playground took a bet when hiring Stoya to a three-to-five-year contract. She doesn't look like Jesse Jane or even like Sophia Santi, formerly the most exotic performer in DP's roster. Instead, she appeals to people like you.

We didn't even ask what she thought her appeal was because we have so many ideas of our own; we didn't want to embarrass the 22-year-old right out of her hoodie dress (well, we didn't want to achieve that by embarrassing her).

But she did offer some clues to the Ineffable. "You'll notice that it boils down to Science," she said. "Symmetrical features, and either you've got the baby-feeding boobs or the child-bearing hips; a cushiony ass."

Oh, Stoya. It couldn't be just that. She cuts the busk of her corsets with her own shears? She is most looking forward to reading "Ender in Exile" on her trip to Vegas? She counsels overzealous fans that she smells when she doesn't wash, too? She admits that her transition from cult porn fame to mainstream porn fame has been "ridiculously weird"?

We kind of know why we have a crush on you, Stoya, even if you don't, and maybe it's best that we keep it ambiguous. We shan't mention it again. But that warm feeling you get like when the Formics are defeated in the Bugger Wars? Well that feeling is us, Stoya. In your cushiony ass.

· Stoya (stoyaxxx.com)
· Digital Playground (digitalplayground.com)

Earning a place as one of the Crush Objects of the Year is an honor like no other, guaranteeing eternal career success and a lifetime of happiness (or at least ten minutes of joy and a year's worth of bragging rights). Who was fortunate enough to make the list this year? Read on to find out.

10.
Baby Sinead
What's the quickest way into the hearts of Team Fleshbot? Gratuitous self promotion—when it's accompanied by hot naked photos, that is. Just a few months ago, Sinead was a mere blip on our radar; now the budding young pornstar and photographer is a full-fledged Crush Object of the Year... and she owes it all to self promotion (well, that and her smart mouth and hot looks).

9.
Bree Olson
Bree may look sweet and innocent on the outside, but just a few minutes with her (or watching her) reveals that she's anything but. With her powerhouse performance, Bree steals the show in just about every film she's featured in—even when she's not the one with top billing.

8.
Shawna Lenee
This stunning young blond goddess won our hearts long before she made an appearance in "Pirates 2," lurking in the biz under several pseudonyms such as Kara Bare and Kara Minor when she had red hair. Over the last year, the growing body of work that this heartbreaker-in-training has compiled far exceeded our expectations. To top it all off, she's closed out 2008 by grasping the coveted title of Penthouse Pet of the Year runner up (and our hearts, too!).

7.
Sinnamon Love
Sinnamon first came to our attention with her fabulous turn in "Chemistry 4"—but she really won our hearts with her appearance on Tyra Banks's abominable "Porn Town" episode. In spite of Tyra, Sinnamon managed to hold her own and prove that making a living from your body does not mean you don't have a brain. Oh, and that cute little gap in her teeth is just to die for.

6.
Lacey Motherfuckin' Duvalle
We find Lacey Motherfuckin' Duvalle so inspiring, it almost makes us want to write an ode in her honor—but it seems that Charles Hamilton beat us to it. (Which is for the best, really—our ode would have been to the tune of "Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star," and would have had way too much profanity to ever be played on the radio.).

5.Rosie Jones
Darling Rosie burst on to the lad mag scene this year as one of the hot new babes of 2008... and one of the best reasons to keep reading lad mags.

4.
Madison Scott
Watching this lithe young beauty devour cock is like watching an honest-to-God possession and wanting to beat off to it. This barely legal beauty exhibits the most rapacious sexual appetite we've ever seen—period! We expect to see more amazing scenes from her in 2009... which means it's definitely going to be a good year.

3.
Penny Flame
Penny's looks alone would be enough to make us fall for her—but it's her personality that's really won us over and rocketed her to the top of her list. With her wicked sense of humor, dedication to smart and sexy sex ed, and all around adorableness, Penny's Crush Object material in every possible way.

2.
Faye Reagan
Incredible breasts, milky white skin, freckles, red hair, and a burning lust that no amount of sex can extinguish all put this fresh faced darling (also known as Faye Valentine) in our sights for Crush Object. Our only regret? She no longer performs boy-girl scenes. At least we can always watch her previous work... and keep our fingers crossed for 2009. Right?

1.
Stoya
How can we sum up Stoya in a mere paragraph? We're pretty sure we can't. The newly elected Fleshbot Supreme Commandress/Extreme Pornstar Champion/2008 Crush Object of the Year is too wondrous to encapsulate in such a small space—we'll be back later with a more proper tribute to the girl of the year. (Image courtesy of Digital Playground.)

Fleshbot's Crush Object Hall of Fame:
2007's Crush Object Of The Year: Sasha Grey
2006's Crush Object Of The Year: Dana DeArmond
2005's Crush Object Of The Year: Joanna Angel

*****

Previously: Fleshbot's 2007 Crush Objects Of The Year, Fleshbot's 2006 Crush Objects Of The Year, Fleshbot's Top Ten Hotties of 2005

In a year of gubernatorial sex scandals, topless Aussie pop stars, Sarah Palin, and, yes, the (gasp!) Gene Simmons sex tape, what stories rose to the top? Read on to see (and, uh, watch out for Gene Simmons's tongue.

10) Postcards From Las Vegas: Abby Winters Lesbian Makeout Session

9) Flesh Flicks: Massage Training (You're Doing It Wrong)

8) Flesh Flicks: Smurf Me

7) Flesh Flicks: Blowjobs 101

6) Faster, Higher, Naked-er: 21 Nude Olympic Athletes

5) International House Of Porn Tapes: Top Ten Amateur Videos From Around The World

4) On The Set Of "Who's Nailin' Paylin?"

3) Real College Wrestling Jocks @ Fratmen.tv (No, Really!)

2) The Secret Life Of Jess Origliasso

1) Calling Dr. Love (To Please Euthanize Us): The "Gene Simmons Sex Tape"

So which weeks served up the hottest slices of erotic blog action? A quick look back reveals some of this year's hottest Sex Blog Roundups. Take care as you're reading through them, we don't want anyone to get burned.

10) Ladies With An Attitude

9) Super Soaked

8) Mister Right Now

7) The Golden Rule

6) What If?

5) How Fucking Romantic

4) Cock Allure

3) Thrills! Chills! Spills!

2) Working It Out

1) Olympic Sized Sex

*****

Previously: Sex Blog Roundup Archive

Well, as with so many other things, it only took the tiniest bit of server voodoo (and just a smidgen of virgin sacrifice) to find out. Come next year, keep a look out for a whole new line of Flesh Flicks, featuring lots of blowjob lessons, public sex shenanigans, and, of course, lots of blue paint. That's what you guys really want, isn't it?

10) A Romp In The Park(ing Lot)

9) Everybody Back On The Bus!

8) The Art Of The Blowjob

7) Shop Til You Drop

6) Nautica Thorn Likes A Challenge

5) Happy Go Lucky

4) File This One Away For Later

3) Massage Training (You're Doing It Wrong)

2) Blowjobs 101

1) Smurf Me!

*****

Previously: Flesh Flicks Archive

Our highly scientific view counter has tabulated the results, and it's all become so clear. Look below to find out which video roundups were most beloved by the Fleshbot readership.

. . .

10) Top Ten Male Domination Sex Videos

9) Top Ten Nurse Sex Videos

8) Top Ten Rooftop Sex Videos

7) Top Ten Bad Babysitter Sex Videos

6) Top Ten Mile High Club Sex Videos

5) Top Ten Honeymoon Sex Videos

4) Top Ten POV Sex Videos

3) Top Ten Office Sex Videos

2) Higher Learning: Top Ten Classroom Sex Videos

1) Top Ten Amateur Videos From Around The World

*****

Previously: Top Ten Videos Archive

But, of course, there were some babes who found greater favor with the Fleshbot readership; below, we'd like to celebrate the most popular babes seen in Fleshbot this year.

10) Hanna And Teresa (Hanna's Honeypot)

9) Sienna (Hustler's College Girls)

8) Puma Swede (Suze.net)

7) Faye and Georgia (Beauty Is Divine)

6) Alena (New Nude City)

5) Naomi (Hegre-Art)

4) Anitta (In Focus Girls)

3) Nikky (Nikky's Dream)

2) Amber Rayne (Fucking Machines)

1) Regina & Geena (Sapphic Erotica)

*****

Previously: Fleshbot Babes Archive

We've gone back through the vaults to piece together our ten most popular Fleshbot Requests. Now if only we could find a redheaded, freckled Asian Jew with curves that won't quit, small boobs with pale, inverted nipples, on a bike in her underwear. Everyone would be happy!

10) Small Boobs

9) Inverted nipples

8) Redheads

7) Curvy Girls

6) Girls In Panties

5) Asian

4) Pale Nipples

3) Girls on Bikes

2) Jewish Girls

1) Freckled Girls

*****

Previously: Fleshbot Requests Archive

After a year of furiously fapping, what toys have left the strongest impression? What toys do I never leave home without—and which are gaining dust in the back of my dresser drawer? Read on and find out:

10) The We-Vibe: Combining vibration with the sexin' always seems like a great idea—but for some reason, it never seems to work out quite right. Given the mechanics of sex, cock rings can't offer a continuous source of vibration—and for some reason, no one's thought of a better solution. Well, until the We-Vibe, that is. Though it may take some exploration to find out how it works best for you, it's a wonderful way to add a little extra bump to your bump and grind.

9) The Bo: But if you'd rather stick with a cock ring, we can offer no better choice than the Bo. Unlike its cheap, gummy rubber counterparts, Bo is made of sterilizable silicone, and comes with a rechargeable battery. Clearly, a cock ring for the future.

8) The Babeland Nubby G: The Nubby G was my first love, Babeland's phthalate free version provides the same wonderful thrills without the fear of toxic chemicals. Even better, it's cheap! **BEST BUY**

7) The Curve: Until I met the Curve, I thought I hated dildos. With it's beautiful, g-spotterific curves, this toy will have you singing its praises within minutes.

6) The Mia: Going on a trip, and worried someone will see you charging your vibe? The Mia can easily pass for a USB thumb drive... until you slip it between your legs. **BEST DISCREET TOY**

5) The Delight: With its delicious curves and many, many vibe patterns, this vibe most certainly is a delight—I just wish it had a simpler navigation system.

4) The Jollie: With it's massive girth and unwieldy appearance, the Jollie may not be for everyone. But if you manage to work it inside your parts, you may find yourself transported to a place you never even knew existed.

3) The Eleven: Sure, we don't all have $300 to spend on a dildo: but if you do, why not purchase a beautifully carved, 11 inch steel dildo? Think of it as an investment. **BEST LUXURY TOY**

2) The Gigi: Sleek, rechargeable, g-spot friendly, and with an adorable mod design, the Gigi's fun to look at, fun to use, and offers some of the best controls ever seen on a dildo.

1) The SaSi: With all the hype and advanced press, I expected to end up heavily disappointed by the SaSi—what vibe could possibly that good? Yet with its innovative design, the SaSi managed to impress even this jaded reviewer, landing it the top slot in this year's sex toy list.


Worst Toy Of 2008: G-Pilot: Whoever thought it was a great idea to make a small plastic shoehorn to guide the penis towards the gspot needs to take some anatomy lessons, stat.

January 2007
· 2007 AVN Awards: Is That All There Is?
· 2007 AVN Awards Photos: Gag On The Glamour!
· Paris (Over)Exposed, Again
· Heather Vandeven, 2007 Penthouse Pet Of The Year (We Think)
· Kimberly Kane: 19th Floor

February 2007
· Exclusive: Hannah Harper Does "Whorecraft"
· Remembering Anna Nicole
· Exclusive: Tristan Taormino's "Chemistry 2" Gallery
· Exclusive: The New Penthouse Magazine
· How To: Have A Frenzied Asian Masturbation Fest (Starring Maria Ozawa!)

March 2007
· DVD Review: Everything You Wanted To Know About "Kim Kardashian, Superstar" But Were Afraid To Watch
· Jada Fire Really Is Squirtwoman
· Keira Knightley Goes Hardcore (Sorta)
· Renae Cruz is "J-Ho: Jenny On The Cock"
· On The Set: "The Da Vinci Load 2"

April 2007
· DVD: Tristan Taormino's "Expert Guide To Anal Sex" · Belladonna Gets Moldy
· Deep Inside Kink Dot Com: Smut With A Smile
· Air Sex: Fuck Like The Wind>
· Olivia Mojica Sex Tape: Resistance Is Futile

May 2007
· You Can Has Lolpr0n!
· Ava And Mia Do "Halo 3"
· Barbie Cummings Fought The Law (And The Law Got Blown)
· National Masturbation Month: A Hands-On Guide
· "Why Interracial Porn is Stupid" (And Why We Agree)

June 2007
· NY Times: Porn Economy Just As Bad As The Regular One
· Obama Girl Seeks Hot Electoral Action
· eBay Item(s) Of The Week: Playboy's "Big Bunny" DC-9
· Introducing Fleshbot v3.14: More Flesh, All The Time
· We Don't Even Have Our iPhones Yet, But Jesse Jane Got Her "Juice" On Them

July 2007
· Rock Of Love's Brandi C Is "In The VIP"
· Porn Debate Raises The Bar On Public Discourse
· The Lost Nintendo Sex Ed Tape
· The Training Of O: It's Not Just A Job, It's An Adventure
· 2257 Regulations: Comin' Around Again

August 2007
· Vanessa Minnillo's Vacation Outtakes
· Do You Sliploos?
· Larry Craig Ruins Hot Public Sex For The Rest Of Us
· What Do Underwear Models Really Look Like?
· Vibrator Of The Year May Lack A Certain Buzz

September 2007
· Natalie Portman's Ass Revealed (Again)
· DVD Review: Digital Playground's "Babysitters"
· Is This Meg White's Icky Thump?
· Melissa Midwest Goes Hardcore
· Porn And Tech @ Arse Elektronika 2007

October 2007
· "Barely Legal 75" (And They Don't Look A Day Over 20!)
· Here's The Story ... Of How To Hype Your Porn Movie
· "Emmanuelle" Is Back Where She Belongs
· DVD Review: "Not The Bradys XXX"
· The Rubbot: Hands Free Masturbation Is (Almost) Here

November 2007
· Scene Analysis: How Older People Do It
· 8-Track Porno: Is It Smut Or Is It Memorex?
· Barely Legal Watch: Hayden Panettiere Works Quickly
· Candice Michelle Grapples With Her Foot Fetish Past
· Wal-Mart Masturbator Cleans Up In Aisle 8

December 2007
· Mary Carey Shocker: Knocker Auction
· Gram's Dirty Dozen: The Year In Porn Movies
· Still More Free Porn Video Sites (Shh! Don't Tell Vivid!)
· Dana DeArmond Is "Role Modeling" (And You Get To Watch)
· Ho Ho Hos: Merry XXXmas Porn To All

This year's crush object list was derived from a secret formula involving nominations by Fleshbot contributors; number of times they were mentioned on the site; a patented coefficient extracted from each subject's astrological chart; and a subjective measure of how much each one of us wanted to date and/or cook a morning after breakfast for each one of the crush objects in question. Find out who they are after the jump.

- - -

10.

Pixie Pearl
According to a certain member of the Fleshbot staff, Burning Angel's Pixie Pearl is "the girl that keeps me up at night." No, we won't tell you who it is ... but Pixie, if a certain Fleshbot staff member approaches you in public sometime and throws herself at your feet in an insomniac frenzy, don't say we didn't warn you.

9.

Monique Alexander
Vivid's wonderful contract star actually smiles at the camera. Who does that anymore? We applaud her courage in not sticking her finger coyly in her mouth at every opportunity and slapping her own ass. We would like to reserve that right for ourselves.

8.

Brandi Belle
The always delightful Brandi Belle manages to set herself apart from all those other amateur and solo gal sites out there by a geeky sense of humor and some genuinely hot setups for her videos. If her stunts haven't made the initials "CFNM" sexy for you ... well, you haven't been paying close enough attention.

7.

Jenny Hendrix
The hardest-working woman in porn, Jenny Hendrix hasn't even taken a nap since July. The world recently teetered at the brink of the abyss when she toyed with the idea of getting new boobs, but she has decided against it for the time being. At 22, she has at least three more months before things start going horribly wrong.

6.

Sophie Howard
It was hard to pick up a lad mag this year without running smack into Sophie Howard's magnificent rack. Fortunately, running into Sophie Howard's rack is something we can't see ourselves getting sick of anytime soon.

5.

Eve ("Iga") Wyrwal
It came from Poland ... the mysterious Eve Wyrwal, that is, who was suddenly everywhere you looked on the babelog scene as "Iga" this fall and then started appearing under her even more consonant-heavy modeling name in the pages of lad mags not long after. Whatever she decides to call herself, we hope she sticks around for a while. (As long as she doesn't keep adding to her aliases; we're having a hard enough time keeping track of her appearances as it is.)

4.

Stoya
Stoya is more than just Digital Playground's attempt at going Alt (whatever that means), but her non-mainstream porn pedigree is so much different—God's Girls, Lzrbunny—from the Hawaiian Tropics via Hooters route taken by Jesse Jane that she is already the highest-profile contract girl with tats since Janine Lindemulder and the recently-departed Sophia Santi.

3.

Maria Ozawa
Maria Ozawa would have made Bill Murray's character in "Lost in Translation" stay in Japan. (So what if she's half Canadian?)

2.

Gianna Michaels
Had Michaels been around at the time of the great Renaissance artists no work would have been done, aside from them crawling over each other to get at her. (Save for Michelangelo of course; he didn't go in for the boobies. Well, more for us.)

1.

Sasha Grey
Next year Sasha Grey turns 20, and she will no longer be America's Sexy Mopey Teen. Luckily for us there is the Porno-Industrial Complex which will ensure that she is in pigtails and plaid skirts until she's at least 26. With luck, by then she will have blown up Chatsworth.

. . .

See also Fleshbot's Crush Object Hall Of Fame:

2005's Crush Object Of The Year

Joanna Angel

2006's Crush Object Of The Year

Dana DeArmond

(And all the other crush objects who made our 2005 and 2006 lists. We'll always have a place in our hearts for you too.)

Join us after the gap as America's Beloved Porn Journalist Gram Ponante takes us through this year's Dirty Dozen ... in no particular order.

- - -

"Upload"
Sex Z Pictures

Of all this year's big budget award contenders, "Upload" took the most risks with some intense hardcore scenes and a bleak futureworld storyline that would be right at home on the Sci Fi channel (minus the intense hardcore scenes). We loved Julie Night and Sandra Romain and Kylie Ireland and Hillary Scott in this movie, but it was Eva Angelina who really made us believe a world in which federal employees have sex.
(Buy it here )

. . .

"Spunk'd"
6969 Productions

Director Justin Kane's first porn movie features Nick Manning in one of several scenery-chewing masterpiece performances this year, this time as Gashton Cootcher, host of a reality prank show that requires loads to be dropped on its celebrity foils. Silly and smart, "Spunk'd" features Penny Flame, Katie Morgan, and Aurora Snow among many others in this list's only independently-produced movie.
( Buy it here )

. . .

"Naughty Flipside"
Naughty America

A vignette film presenting San Diego studio Naughty America's take on The Girls of Alternative Porn Casting, "Naughty Flipside" is an unabashedly fun porn movie that features a tapdancing Pinky Lee and some equally fancy footwork from Dana DeArmond. Adrianna Nicole and Lorelei Lee have a hoedown with Tommy Pistol and Sasha Grey makes her first of many appearances on this list as a mopey teen.
( Buy it here )

. . .

"The Skin Trade"
Bad Seed

Sasha Grey plays a mopey teen who blows off Brian Surewood's head in Joe Gallant's peyote-porn about the dark side ("as a matter of fact, it's all dark") of sex for money. If "The Dharma Bums" was about an acid trip sex/killing spree instead of whatever it was about, Joe Gallant would need to direct it. Until then, watch "The Skin Trade".
( Buy it here )

. . .

"Broken"
Teravision

Sasha Grey plays a mopey teen who blows off Dave Navarro's head in Dave Navarro's L.A.-porn about the dark side ("as a matter of fact, it's all dark") of sex for money. There is nothing fancy about this movie, which is nevertheless just a bit precious at times, but first-time director Navarro looks at the standard moody porn scene a different way and the movie benefits from it.
( Buy it here )

. . .

"InTERActive"
Hustler/Teravision

You carry on a secret affair with neglected mob housewife Tera Patrick and together you choose your own adventure. Shot over four years, "InTERActive" features cameos from Jessica Jaymes and Hillary Scott, but the big star is Tera, who brings to the screen an accessibility that her in-person fans know but that doesn't as often show up in her movies. More please.
( Buy it here )

. . .

"Swallow My Children"
Loaded DIgital

Rob Rotten put together a gang of greasers, longhairs, and the homeless and paired them with a really delightful gang of badass punk girls for a blowjob vignette movie that for once features Sasha Grey as a non-mopey teen sans shotgun.
( Buy it here )

. . .

"Ibiza Sex Party 2"
Private

I just flew in from Barcelona and I've paid a little extra for the hooker to smile at me every now and then, for Christ's sake. There's coke on my dick and house music playing - loud, I don't care how much this vacation is going to cost. This is that movie!
( Buy it here )

. . .

"Babysitters"
Digital Playground

Everything you might want from a Digital Playground movie is here, for a fifth of the price of "Pirates" (remember "Pirates"?) - and we don't mean "Babysitters" will cost you a fifth of the price of "Pirates", just that it cost Digital Playground a fifth of the price of "Pirates". This movie showed up when we expected to see "Pirates 2" but, frankly, we found this much more accessible and less fraught with high expectations, which means that it arrived without hype. "Babysitters" also has the largest amount - four - of Digital Playground's contract girls in 2007.
( Buy it here )

. . .

"Amy Fisher Caught on Tape"
Red Light District

Maybe in future iterations of Fleshbot's constantly-changing page layout we will get a sidebar. If so, this movie would be in its own category under "Best Celebrity Sex Tape". No great shakes as compared with other standard-issue porns, "Amy Fisher" is nevertheless hands down the best celebrity sex tape this year. Why? Well, there's sex in it, for one, and Fisher is the embodiment of the Long Island hot MILF aesthetic. Watching this movie you will say, "I could shoot Amy in the face - but not with bullets."
( Buy it here )

. . .


"The Pleasure Principle"
Wicked

Wicked has had a lot of expertly-directed, slickly packaged movies this year, including "Operation Desert Stormy" and "Coming Home", but Carmen Hart was adorable in this modest "It's OK to Enjoy Sex" movie for couples. Of all the contract girls, Hart is the most reminiscent of the groovy porn stars of antiquity, like Marilyn Chambers, Seka, and Christy Canyon.
( Buy it here )

. . .

"The Intern"
Lucas Entertainment

The second sidebar would be The Best (And Only) Gay Film Straight-Tagged Fleshbot Watched This Year. I have evidence that that people who watch a lot of gay porn liked this breezy comedy set in a New York gay studio too, and I performed due diligence by asking around if all gay-themed porn was as good as "The Intern", and was told that No, Breeder, It Is Not. So I lucked out. Buy this for your girlfriend, Girlfriend, and show her that you're not threatened by the size of Ben Andrews.
( Buy it here )

. . .

BAKER'S DOZEN:

"Porn's Most Outrageous Outtakes 2"
JM Productions

Director Jim Powers narrates an often chilling backstage look at some of his sets with a combination of weariness and glee. While Powers usually directs rougher fare which you might expect to spawn breakdowns, tears, regret, and fights, his sardonic humor has a place in each porn company. This movie reminds us that for every high-gloss example of empowerment through porn, there are fifty times as many stories that confirm porn's detractors' worst suspicions.
( Buy it here )

Check out some of the moments that kept our jobs interesting this year after the jump.

. . .

10

Not Meg White
Sometimes the best sex scandals are the ones that aren't true. Did White Stripes rhythm section Meg White really bang some college student in his dorm and let him film it? Does it even matter?

9

Britney's Downward Spiral, Stage 3
So ... um ... yeah ... that happened. Moving on ...

8

Hayden's Barely Legal Year
Another hot young babe had her "it's no longer creepy" party, to be followed next year by her "whatever happened to?" fiesta (i.e., her 19th birthday).

7

Everybody's Preggers!
Salma. Christina. Halle. Jessica. J-Love. Jaime-Lynn? (No comment on that one.) Everyone seems to have forgone the sexy on-camera Hollywood screwing for the private, baby-making kind. On the plus side, bigger boobs are always nice.

6

Anything Sienna Miller Does. Ever.
Seriously, we're not sure if this gal even owns a shirt, much less knows how to wear one, but we're just glad that her dedication to the cause of the celebrity nudity is so strong and vital.

5

Amy Fisher Understands A Good Press Event
Step aside, all you amateur scandalebrities: let a real tabloid veteran show you how it's done!

4

Natalie Portman's Ass
Better in theory than in iPod-quality practice, but any chance to see Ms. Portman sans culottes is a chance we're never going to pass up.

3

Kim Kardashian: Superstar?
The Paris Hilton "famous for being famous while having sex" phenomenon comes full circle, as her former sidekick parlays her fame by association into a TV show, a Playboy shoot and the worst Vivid video of all time. But at least she's not shy.

2

Vanessa Hudgens' Graduation Gift
Even gay men agree: don't send your high school musical boyfriend full-frontal nudie pics unless you're absolutely sure he can be trusted to not share them with all his friends Planet Earth. (P.S. You can't.)

1

Vanessa and Nick's Excellent Adventure
While they are not the biggest names on this list, the Mexican hot tub dance between pseudo-celebrities Nick Lachey and Vanessa Minnillo was quite possibly our biggest story of the year. We hope that had more to do with the revelation of Vanessa's generous bush than Nick's pained o-face, but the moral, as always, is that watching famous people do dirty things is a terrific way to pass the time.

* * * * *

Honorable Mention: Sharon Stone's Outrageous Cameltoe, Marisa Tomei Wakes The Dead, and Mr. Skin's Top 20 Nude Scenes Of 2007