This week's round up of thrill-inducing sex blog moments features our two favorite girlie body parts: the breasts. Why pay homage to these luscious beauties? They're soft, warm, touchable. They bounce so fetchingly. Read on for odes to breasts' magnificence.

—-—-
The Best First Date Ever

He asked if he could feel my breasts. I said of course. He moved his hands over my sweater, rubbing my nipples. I moaned and felt my panties begin to soak through. My pussy was throbbing, aching to be filled with his cock. I was just about ready to strip off my clothes-the bar was emptying out and perhaps no one would notice-when he whispered in my ear "Please stand up."

—Torchlight

—-—-

I Saw Myself Reflected

I watched her in the mirror across the room as she laid in her bed. The reflection was of a girl with disheveled hair and flushed cheeks. She was completely naked, cunt shaved bare and tiny nipples hard as rocks and pointing to the ceiling. There was a towel beneath her. Her legs were open, knees bent and feet planted firmly on the bed. A stainless steel dildo filled her cunt while a plug filled her ass. The inside of her thighs glistened with the juices that had seeped out of her cunt and had made their way down her legs, down her ass, and into a puddle beneath her.

—Oh My God, That Britni's Shameless

—-—-

Threesome

Back in the room we head straight to the bed, and she and i keep making out, hands slipping up under tops and skirts now that the tiny bit of modesty we were preserving in the taxi is no longer necessary. You sit back and watch us as bit by bit our clothes come off. Her dress is first, when i get frustrated that i can't get to her nipples because of the cut of the dress. So off it goes, revealing a sexy matching bra and panty set. i pull the cups of her bra down and start sucking her ample breasts, alternating nipples and keeping the other nipple occupied with my fingers pulling and tugging and stroking.

—long-distance sub

—-—-

Excited sis

He used some of the tingle gel to lubricate me (and then slid into my pussy - I think to ensure that it would also tingle and to get some of my natural lubrication to help) and then pressed up against my ass. I slowly pressed back against him as he spread my ass cheeks and felt him slide into me a little. He added a bit more gel and started pumping away - pressing a little deeper each time until he had a nice rhythm going and was sliding a good way into me.

—Cumming of age

—-—-

Just dance

I grabbed his hand and dragged him to the dancefloor. First we danced close together, chest pressed against chest, and I rubbed my cunt on his growing hardon. I didn't say anything, just made him see that my wetness was soaking the crotch of his pants, I wasn't wearing any panties. Over the loud music I could hear his breathing catch up to my own as the truth dawned on him.

—18 and Nymfo

—-—-

The Office (SG Style)

Stand me before marble vanity and huge mirror. Angle yourself behind me and watch as you unbutton my blouse. Free these aching breasts from the confines of camisole and bra. My nipples are straining for your fingertips to tease them. Alternate between the soft caress and wincing pinch which draws my breath.

—From There to Here

*****

· Thumbnail star: Gianna Michaels (freepornofreeporn.com)
· Previously: Sex Blog Roundup Archive

However, back in the 1960s, an elaborate system of jedi mind tricks ensured participants that real, live, bouffant nudity was going down during (or at least after) the phone call. Where have these techniques gone? Can we still learn them? We have a few prank calls to make.

·"Vintage Telephone Stripper" (archive.org)

Seka turns 55 today, which seems awfully young for someone who has been such a legend for such a long time – she isn't the girl she was when she hit the screen in 1978, but she is a woman who is just as sexy, in a different way, as that girl ever was.

Some stars age well, and some don't, but Seka is looking pretty damn good. I think if she had never been in porn and tried to make a start in it today, she'd do pretty well. I'd buy her movies.

Bio data courtesy of the Internet Adult Film Database

· Internet Adult Film Database (iafd.com)
· Seka at IAFD.com (iafd.com)
· Buy Seka's movies (gamelink.com)

Unfair and also inaccurate, partly because Missy Monroe didn't even get into porn until 2003, and Missy Monroe is therefore the Missy Monroe of the new millennium, but also because Claudia Downs is delightfully and emphatically her own person and does not have to be the anybody else of the anytime.

Sure, they both have that short blonde haircut that I love so much, and they both have perfect natural tits, and they both weigh exactly the same. But it would be a disservice to Claudia to love her for anything other than her own personal charms, which are considerable. Happy birthday, Claudia!

Bio data courtesy of the Internet Adult Film Database

· Internet Adult Film Database (iafd.com)
· Claudia Downs at IAFD.com (iafd.com)
· Buy Claudia Downs' movies (gamelink.com)

Miss Bunny is light and fluffy, a hoppy, happy pleaser with – duh – bunny ears on one of those hair things that often hold antennae and tiaras. I don't know what they're called. Venus Inferno, though – she's a maneater; she doesn't have bunny ears, that's for sure – she's got a riding crop and a corset and spike heels, maybe a cigarette holder, too.

And Juliette Alexander? She's one of those girls that has an innocuous name but often gets voted "World's Dirtiest Porn Star," like Julie Night or Anne Howe. She's the one who shows up in German porn that you run across by accident when you stray into a New York adult video store looking for a peepshow to check out while you're visiting the family on Thanksgiving vacation.

Isn't it nice to meet Miss Bunny and Venus Inferno and Juliette Alexander all in the same girl? It's like she's everything you could possibly need, all wrapped up in one package. Happy birthday, girls!

(We're so happy, by the way, that we're celebrating all three of your birthdays for 48 hours - ED)

Bio data courtesy of the Internet Adult Film Database

· Internet Adult Film Database (iafd.com)
· Miss Bunny at IAFD.com (iafd.com)
· Buy Miss Bunny's movies (gamelink.com)

And then I go look at actual pictures of Vanessa, and I realize that porn's first Latina superstar really is a caricature – a delightful, sexy, outrageous cartoon of the kind of woman you really, really hope would be waiting for you if you went down to the border and stepped across. Even though she's from New York.

Vanessa turns 57 today, and she is just as lusty and salacious and delicious as she was ten, twenty, thirty years ago – living it up and putting the kids to shame. Happy birthday, Vanessa – thanks for everything!

Bio data courtesy of the Internet Adult Film Database

· Internet Adult Film Database (iafd.com)
· Vanessa Del Rio (VanessaDelRio.com)
· Vanessa Del Rio at IAFD.com (iafd.com)
· Buy Vanessa Del Rio's movies (gamelink.com)

She shares her birthday with two Byzantine emperors, a king and queen of Naples, Custer's senior captain at the Battle of Little Bighorn, a queen of Yugoslavia, and Ed Begley, Jr. Not to mention…oh, man, would you look at those things? They're so perfect and natural – no kidding. I could just…

Oh. Sorry. I was saying that the, uh, that…oh, that March 25th is also Pecan Day AND International Waffle Day, and, according to some, the day pancakes were invented in 1882. It is also the Feast Day of St. Dismas, Jesus' "Good Thief," although I don't know if pancakes or waffles would be appropriate feast items. I do know that I would totally feast on that ass – it's like a…um, a…a feast of – ass, or something.

Jeez. Sorry. Adrianna turns 28 today. 28 is also, coincidentally, the number of miles I would walk barefoot across hot sand to get to her if she called me up and asked me to come over. She keeps getting better too – next year it will be 29 miles.

Bio data courtesy of the Internet Adult Film Database

· Adrianna Nicole at IAFD.com (iafd.com)
· I am the world's greatest porn director (gramponante.com)
· Buy Adrianna Nicole's movies (gamelink.com)

Laura, who was born in Litomerice in the Czech Republic, is also known as Lenka Lyons, Yvette Boutillon, Lenka Prasilova, Laura Hon, Lauren Lion, Laura Finn, Laura Lyon, Laura Linn, Lenka Pr., Laura, Lena, Lenka and…(wait for it)…Black Queen. I love it when one of the names is so radically different from the rest as to make you wonder what was going on in that one movie.

It seems to be a particular trait of girls from Hungary and the Czech Republic that they have more aliases than Frank Abagnale Jr.; I wonder if it's something in the water, or if they have just had so many orgasmov – a little priderzhivala plunger is a dangerous thing – that she can't think straight any more.

Well, anyway, happy birthday, Laura, and also to Lenka, Yvette, Lauren, Lena and Your Royal Highness.

Bio data courtesy of the Internet Adult Film Database

· Internet Adult Film Database (iafd.com)
· Laura Lion at IAFD.com (iafd.com)
· Buy Laura Lion's movies (gamelink.com)

And yet there she is – taunting, beckoning, fresh-faced…it's like she's fresh out of – well, wherever hot teenagers come from these days. She looks so wholesome that it takes a second to register that bathing suit as something a person might not just wear on the street.

How can she be showing up in MILF porn? It seems like she's one of those girls that will never age a second or look like she has acare in the world. Happy birthday, you magical little sprite.

Bio data courtesy of the Internet Adult Film Database

· Holly West at IAFD.com (iafd.com)
· Holly West, Savannah Gold when gas cost $3.60 a gallon (gramponante.com)
· Buy Holly West's movies (gamelink.com)

"Busty." "Stacked." "Bodacious" – the girls with the big boobs get all the love, but look at those delightful little almost-mounds and try – just try – to tell us you wouldn't enjoy them just as much as a bigger pair. You can't do it.

All the words we can think of for a small-chested girl are unflattering, and Kylie – among many others – deserves more. Put some thought into it and make her 24th birthday present a word we can use to tell her how much we like that shape.

Bio data courtesy of the Internet Adult Film Database

· Internet Adult Film Database (www.iafd.com)
· Kylie Richards at IAFD.com (iafd.com)
· Buy Kylie Richards's movies (gamelink.com)

It is a complex world, particularly now with all kinds of craziness rearing its head in the stock market, in politics, in real estate, and we'd like to take a moment to wish Stormy a happy, sane and enjoyable 30th birthday.

Take a load off, Stormy – just kick off your shoes, have a piece of cake – whatever your favorite kind is – and relax for a little bit. Take a listening tour of Louisiana tomorrow; it'll still be there.

Oh, and Happy St. Patrick's Day, as well. Have some green beer with that cake.

Bio data courtesy of the Internet Adult Film Database

· Internet Adult Film Database (www.iafd.com)
· Stormy Daniels at IAFD.com (iafd.com)
· Buy Stormy Daniels's movies (gamelink.com)

Since I first saw her, I haven't been able to resist stopping and staring whenever I see a picture of her. Although Summer was born in Reno, Nevada, 41 years ago today, I still think of her as English, because for years I only ever saw her in issues of British-produced fetish magazines like Marquis and O. She's as American as apple pie, though.

She is so fascinating that once I sat through an entire bondage movie watching her.

I'm still not sure why. It's not her boobs, which are listed in various places as anywhere from 36FF to 45EEE (which, if I understand how boobs are measured, is a hell of a difference). I think it's her face. She always looks like a porcelain doll.

It might be the difference between her face and her boobs. I'm going to keep looking, and I'll report back if I figure it out.

Bio data courtesy of the Internet Adult Film Database

· Internet Adult Film Database (www.iafd.com)
· Summer Cummings at IAFD.com (iafd.com)
· Buy Summer Cummings' movies (gamelink.com)

I can recognize them both – they're really cute and you should definitely check them out – but I can't remember which one's Whitney and which one's Britney. It's like trying to remember who's Statler and who's Waldorf.

Britney, it turns out, is the older one, the one with more tattoos, the one with real breasts, the one with the adorable lateral lisp, the one who turns 24 today. There must be some kind of mnemonic I could devise to help me remember this.

It would be so embarrassing if I ended up shouting the wrong name.

Bio data courtesy of the Internet Adult Film Database

· Internet Adult Film Database (iafd.com)
· Britney Stevens at IAFD.com (iafd.com)
· Buy Britney Stevens's movies (gamelink.com)

Like that time Birthday Girl Julie Simone, who turns 35 today, said "Bring your girlfriend over dressed in a pair of high heels and a plaid skirt and lean her on this sex swing while I pull her skirt up and smack her on the ass with this wooden paddle."

See, Sunset—em>that's how you ask for things.

Bio data courtesy of the Internet Adult Film Database

· Internet Adult Film Database (www.iafd.com)
· Sunset Thomas at IAFD.com (iafd.com)
· Julie Simone at IAFD.com (iafd.com)
· Buy Sunset Thomas's movies (gamelink.com) · Buy Julie Simone's movies (gamelink.com)

I remember seeing her on VHS box covers in the adult section of the Tower Records in my neighborhood at a time when VHS was also new and exciting, and thinking that those could not possibly be real.

It turned out that I was right; they weren't. But the experience led me to the greater question of what is and is not real, and to the conclusion that they were certainly real enough.

The 46Gs are gone now, but Kitten remains, and she turns 61 today. She still looks nice.

Bio data courtesy of the Internet Adult Film Database

· Internet Adult Film Database (www.iafd.com)
· Kitten Natividad at IAFD.com (iafd.com)
· Buy Kitten Natividad's movies (gamelink.com)

Velicity, who turns 30 today and whose name is not Velocity, appears to feel, nearly every time, like she just wasn't expecting that.

If you are searching the web for pictures of Velocity, that is why you are getting nothing but graphs and pictures of cheetahs instead of pictures of Velicity Von being surprised again.

Bio data courtesy of the Internet Adult Film Database

· Internet Adult Film Database (www.iafd.com)
· Velicity Von at IAFD.com (iafd.com)
· Buy Velicity Von's movies (gamelink.com)

Priya, in India, is a common given name meaning “dear” or “beloved”, and Rai is a Rajput title of honor title accorded to certain princes in Northern India, so her name, taken in toto, means ”Dear Lord.”

Ha ha. The funny thing is that Priyā (with the diacritical mark over the last letter), is the female version of the name; she doesn’t use it, though, so her name is actually masculine. And Rai is actually a male title, so, ha ha, that means –

Wait a minute.

Oh, Priya Rai!

[We know all there is to know about the crying game - ED]

Bio data courtesy of the Internet Adult Film Database

· Internet Adult Film Database (www.iafd.com)
· Priya Rai at IAFD.com (iafd.com)
· Buy Priya Rai’s movies (gamelink.com)

And by rip off, I do not mean steal or cheat out of; at conventions, Ava is well known for her habit of unzipping pants, reaching in, grabbing underwear, and extracting it without the benefit of taking the wearer’s pants off first.

I was too clever for her—I wasn’t wearing any underwear, so you could say, if you were feeling like it, that I sure showed her—but many other fans were not nearly so lucky. Ava Devine is, without a doubt, the most entertaining porn star I have ever seen at a convention. I hope that next year, now that she has turned 35, she will be as much fun as she was at 34, 33, 32 and 31.

Bio data courtesy of the Internet Adult Film Database

· Internet Adult Film Database (www.iafd.com)
· Ava Devine at IAFD.com (iafd.com)
· Buy Ava Devine’s movies (gamelink.com)

Look at her. She is clearly the product of a fiendish plan to take over the world by creating a sort of primal porn star. How does the plan work? I don’t know; I am not a scientist.

But look at the look on her face. Have you ever seen someone so obviously bent on conquering? No, you have not.

Bio data courtesy of the Internet Adult Film Database

· Internet Adult Film Database (www.iafd.com)
· MacKenzie Mack at IAFD.com (iafd.com)
· Buy MacKenzie Mack’s movies (gamelink.com)

I also cannot think of Danni Ashe without thinking of a product I was once responsible for shipping to people who previously had none of it: Danni’s Jiggly Fantasy Boobs. I have never had the opportunity to touch Danni’s actual personal Jiggly Fantasy Boobs, and although they are no doubt absolutely delightful, I cannot imagine that they are as solid and heavy as the ones you can buy on the Internet.

In my Jiggly Fantasy, Danni Ashe is wearing my beloved San Francisco Gigantes sweatshirt, but I am still cradling her Jiggly Fantasy Boobs.

(In finding and appropriating these images of Danni Ashe, I am simply seeking to further her record as Most Downloaded Woman on the Internet.)

Bio data courtesy of the Internet Adult Film Database

· Buy Danni’s Jiggly Fantasy Boobs (gamelink.com)
· Internet Adult Film Database (www.iafd.com)
· Danni Ashe at IAFD.com (iafd.com)
· Buy Danni Ashe’s movies (gamelink.com)