<![CDATA[Fleshbot: straight, stupid]]> http://tags.fleshbot.com/assets/base/img/thumbs140x140/fleshbot.com.png <![CDATA[Fleshbot: straight, stupid]]> http://fleshbot.com/tag/straight/stupid http://fleshbot.com/tag/straight/stupid <![CDATA[Vivid Looking To Make Tiger Woods Porn]]> Because there's more money in celebrity scandals than porn made by pornstars, Vivid's looking to pay $1 million to any woman who can prove she was a paramour of Tiger Woods—and signs a contract with the studio.

We're not really sure what sort of proof is required (a sex tape? A voicemail? Dirty pictures?), or what her contract would entail—but then again, Vivid probably doesn't either. Who needs a well thought out business plan when you can get tons of publicity off some half-baked porn contract promise you'll never have to follow up on?

· Vivid Offers $1 Million for True Tiger Riding Tales (avn.com)

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<![CDATA[College Rivalries: National American University Vs. Naughty America University]]> File under "Lamest Lawsuit Ever": National American University is suing Naughty America, claiming that the site Naughty America University (not Naughty American University, as USA Today incorrectly reports) infringes on trademarks and is potentially confusing. Because we totally thought the orgies were happening at National American. (usatoday.com, thumbnail)

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<![CDATA[Don't Fuck With Bree Olson]]> Earlier this week, you may have seen a video of Bree Olson throwing a fit. Knowing Bree to be an intelligent, levelheaded girl, we figured there was probably a story behind this.

We also figured it was probably not the "Bree Olson, psycho pornstar" story that was being circulated by the staff of the "Bubba The Love Sponge Show" (who, incidentally, happened to be responsible for Bree's meltdown). So we waited to hear her side of the story.

It seems that Bree was the victim of an immature prank—one that began when the show decided to prank a "dumb porn whore" into giving a handjob to a man pretending to be blind, and escalated when they proceeded to document (and distribute) Bree's rage at learning that she'd been set up to be made a fool of.

Until this week, we'd never heard of the "Bubba The Love Sponge" show—and if we had, we'd be boycotting it right now. The disrespect that these people showed towards Bree, both before, during, and after her appearance on their program, is disgusting and unprofessional—and we're happy to see that Bree is letting everyone know the truth about her "meltdown."

· What REALLY Happened on Bubba the Love Sponge Show (myspace.com)
· Thumbnail: Badass Bree Olson (nsgalleries.com)

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<![CDATA[Vivid Still Pursuing Octomom]]> Devil's Film may have settled for "Coctomom," but Vivid is still trying for the real thing: they've offered her a shot at a million dollar TV deal... provided she'll accept Vivid Girls as nannies. (tmz.com)

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<![CDATA[Sex Sells... Garden Gnomes?]]> Romanian businessman Cristi Birgu has attracted attention by trying to drum up sales for his garden gnome business with the strategic use of prostitutes. Plastic prostitutes, that is: Birgu has the miniature ladies of the evening—also manufactured by his company—placed outside his home, in the hopes that they'll attract potential buyers. Somehow, we just can't see much overlap between the people who buy garden gnomes and the people who solicit sex workers—but hey, what do we know? (ananova.com)

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<![CDATA[This Week In Frivolous Lawsuits]]> Listen very carefully, because we're only going to say this once: Lexus is a line of luxury automobiles put out by Toyota. Alexus Winston is a naked model affiliated with Infinity Studios (and sometimes seen in Best Of Babelogs). We're not really sure how someone would confuse the two — but apparently this was a major concern, as Toyota recently filed suit against Alexus, who's now going by Alex. Were you able to keep that all straight? Good for you! We're just hoping they don't find out about all that porn we made under the name Prius Corolla. (avn.com)

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<![CDATA[ And in other health code violation news:...]]> And in other health code violation news: a St. Kilda, Australia, pub has come under fire for its "No Undie Sundie" promotion. Apparently, encouraging women to take off their panties in exchange for a $50 drink card just wasn't the smartest idea. We think it's brilliant, of course, but that's just us. (news.com.au, no undie thumbnail star Rachel Aziani via Ask Jolene)

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<![CDATA[ Internet "experts" are warning people not...]]> Internet "experts" are warning people not to click on any emails that promise you a Barack Obama sex video. Instead, they advise you to wait for the inevitable Sarah Palin sex video, because it's much hotter and maybe involves a pig or a moose or something. (Actually, the Obama email contains malware that will eat your computer's brain or something. In case you hadn't figured that out already.) (cnet.com)

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<![CDATA[Sorry, Julianna Margulies Fans, But That's Not A Vagina]]> To any and all of you who believe you've now seen Julianna Margulies' hoo-ha, we regret to inform you that that is not what a vagina looks like. More than likely, it's either a picture of Julianna's thighs pressed together, a picture of her pantyhose seam, or a poorly done Photoshop job put together by someone with a limited knowledge of female anatomy and a whole lot of wishful thinking. Trust us, we know. (defamer.com)

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<![CDATA[An Australian preacher has a very good reason...]]> An Australian preacher has a very good reason for pretending he had cancer and lying about it to his own parishioners for over two years—he was addicted to porn, of course! Pornography: Is there anything we can't blame on it? (news.com.au)]]> http://fleshbot.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5041266&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[ The sexy coffee craze in the Pacific Northwest...]]> The sexy coffee craze in the Pacific Northwest has apparently gotten out of hand as "Espresso Gone Wild" is being told to cover up or shut down. (Personally, we think they should be fined for the name.) Won't someone please think of the children health code violations? (azcentral.com)

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<![CDATA[ Meet Mr. Testis, the mascot of the San Fermin...]]> Meet Mr. Testis, the mascot of the San Fermin Festival in Pamplona, Spain. (You know, the one where all the people get trampled by wild animals in the streets.) Thanks to some excess baggage he's carrying, however, at least this is one bull you'll be able to outrun. (Click for video.)

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· "Mr. Testis" (YouTube via machochip.com)

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<![CDATA[Why No One Cares That Video Games Have Sex In Them]]> Some of you may recall that old lawsuit involving the game "Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas" and the "Hot Coffee" mod that allowed characters in it to have graphic sex. That's disgusting, of course, so some lawyers filed a class-action lawsuit and forced a settlement that would allow any of the millions of innocent, outraged people who bought the game to come forward and receive justice. So just how many of these folks were outraged enough to do so? 2,676. That's it.

So why did they bring the suit in the first place? Good question! One of the lawyers involved said that people should not have to be surprised by sex in an otherwise innocent video game—even if that "surprise" is impossible since one had to willfully download and install the mod in order to see the dirty stuff. It wasn't made, sold or endorsed by the company that was sued, and there was no doubt what the modification was for. Yet, even if it Take Two Interactive fully meant for this animated porn to appear in the game, why would so few of the millions of customers who bought a copy be offended enough to file a claim (even taking into account that half of those folks probably just wanted the free money anyway?) Maybe because the goal of the game is to rob, beat and murder anyone who stands your way in order to become the greatest professional criminal in the city. Who cares if you see some boobs along the way?

The one thing games and porn have in common is that people use them to act out fantasies that can't happen—and that you probably wouldn't even want to happen—in real life. As violent and sexy as they can be, they're completely harmless for the most part—and the kind of gamer who enjoys running over police officers probably wouldn't be too put out by a little animated nudity. And we don't have to remind everyone once again that while extreme violence is routinely overlooked in pretty much all media, the merest hint of sex sends certain people screaming for the hills. Those same people think everyone else will follow—but as the results of this lawsuit show, they won't.

(Oh, by the way, the lawyers who brought the suit are looking to collect around $1.3 million in legal fees for their trouble. The 2,676 claim holders combined will receive less than $30,000.)

· Hidden Sex Scenes Draw Ho-Hum, Except From Lawyers (NYTimes.com)
· Should you care about sex in video games? (cnet.com)

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<![CDATA[ Some people want over-the-counter "sexual...]]> Some people want over-the-counter "sexual aids" taken off store shelves because somehow having Horny Goat Weed available at the Pick N' Save turns everyone into whores. How come no one ever does anything about the dastardly influence of beef jerky sticks? (caller.com)

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<![CDATA[ An angry "Swingtown" viewer wants to sue...]]> An angry "Swingtown" viewer wants to sue CBS because he used to work at notorious New York City sex palace Plato's Retreat and he totally had an idea for a TV show about swingers, like ... 20 years ago. It's just like that time we said that it would be cool if dinosaurs still existed and then "Jurassic Park" ripped us off! (nypost.com)

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<![CDATA[Hillary And Barack Are For Porn (And We're For Bad YouTube Videos)]]> The interminable Democratic nominating process is claiming more victims today in Kentucky and Oregon and we've had just about all we can take of delegate counts and exit polls and secret Muslim (or is it Christian?) conspiracies to take over the government—so much so that our only refuge is an ill-conceived YouTube mashup involving the "Avenue Q" Broadway cast recording and a lot of awkwardly posed photos of Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama. This is what happens when people have too much time and democracy on their hands.

· Elections Are for Porn (YouTube)

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<![CDATA[ A crack team of airline security experts...]]> A crack team of airline security experts forced a woman in Texas to remove her nipple piercings before being allowed to board a flight. Her lawyer says, "The last time that I checked a nipple was not a dangerous weapon," but obviously she's never checked Kate Moss on an ice cold January morning. (news.yahoo.com - thanks Dave)

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<![CDATA[ Any dudes who are still smarting over that...]]> Any dudes who are still smarting over that ball busting video from the other day can work out a little bit of their sympathetic pain with some virtual vagina punching. We promise no vaginas were harmed in the making of this clip. (Click image for video.)

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· Fighter Maker 2 lowblow montage (YouTube, via yesbutnobutyes.com)

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<![CDATA[ The FCC wants to fine ABC and its affiliates...]]> The FCC wants to fine ABC and its affiliates $1.4 million for broadcasting someone's bare ass on a TV show that went off the air like, five years ago. By the way, butt cheeks are now a "sexual organ," but maybe that just depends on how you use them. (broadcastingcable.com, via Gawker)

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<![CDATA[ A reverend in the town of Whitewood, South...]]> A reverend in the town of Whitewood, South Dakota (population: 800) wants to change the name of Hooker St., because he thinks it's offensive—even though it was named after Civil War General "Fighting" Joe Hooker and the address is only used by one resident. Which also proves once again that there is nothing better to do in South Dakota. (ap.google.com)

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