Fleshbot: straight, shocking!

Scandal!: Underwear Model Once Modeled Without Underwear

Dashiell Bennett — Tue, 26 Aug 2008 16:10:32 EDT

You may recognize Katie Green's cleavage from that new Wonderbra ad—or maybe from a totally shocking and scandalous threeway lesbian porno shoot she did in her "shameful past." We know it must be very hard for British tabloids to accept the fact that a woman who gets paid to model see-through underwear might at one point in her life have modeled just her body—but sadly, it does happen sometimes. The News Of The World is so torn up over this they even forget to "CENSOR" one of the three topless photos in question! Hopefully, the fine and upstanding folks at Wonderbra will see fit to punish Katie Green the way they punished their last shameless nude porno model ... by giving her her own line of lingerie. If you can stomach it, the offending pictures are below.

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· "New wonderbra babe Katie Green's lesbian porn shame" (newsoftheworld.co.uk)

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Previously: Wonderbra Crowdsources Breasts To Sell ... Uh, Something

A new study has come to shocking conclusion...

Dashiell Bennett — Tue, 26 Aug 2008 12:30:30 EDT

A new study has come to shocking conclusion that people who are into BDSM are not really dangerous and deranged individuals who were abused as children—in fact, they might actually be "normal!" Don't worry, you can still be into bondage and still be a freak—just, you know, the good kind. (theaustralian.news.com.au)

A scientific survey of what we're assuming...

Dashiell Bennett — Wed, 25 Jun 2008 14:41:00 EDT

A scientific survey of what we're assuming was a large group of standup comedians reveals the shocking truth that women prefer committed relationships to one night stands and want more like, hugs and junk, while men will simply do anything in their power to see a naked breast and then brag about it to their friends. So, six of one, half of dozen of the other, right?(sunderlandecho.com)

Scandal rocks a public library in Brooklyn...

Dashiell Bennett — Mon, 12 May 2008 12:45:44 EDT

Scandal rocks a public library in Brooklyn as adults using the adult computers were found looking at adult material ... by another adult. Of course, we never use the library because we have all the porn we need at home, but we realize that everyone's not as lucky as we are. (gowanuslounge.com)

A Hoax, You Say?

Dashiell Bennett — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 09:57:38 EDT

Guess what? That "new" Marilyn Monroe sex tape? Probably not real! And the guy who claims to have sold it may be just a self-absorbed name dropper who likes the attention. Stunning, isn't it? We know that you're hurt and confused by all these dastardly lies, but try not to let it ruin your faith in celebrity sex tapes. (Defamer)

Breaking: Reality TV Person Once Photographed Naked

Dashiell Bennett — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 17:21:27 EDT

We're sorry to have to tell you this, but a person who is famous only for appearing on a reality TV show once had her picture taken without clothes on. We would tell you more here, but we actually read the story and we're still not sure who she is or why you should know her. (takeareport.com, via Gawker)

Who's That Girl?: The Greatest Celebrity Sex Scandals That Weren't

Dashiell Bennett — Wed, 19 Mar 2008 13:20:28 EDT

Everyone loves celebrity sex stories; we probably wouldn't be in business if they didn't. But one problem with amateur handheld night-vision camera phone pornography is that it's often difficult to identify the participants. Of course, that also makes it easy to dupe a public eager for juicy gossip into thinking that you fucked a movie star. The more immediate problem for us is that whenever one of these sexy stories "leaks" people turn to us to pass an informed judgment on its veracity—and most of the time, we're just as confused as everyone else: we do pride ourselves on our ability to spot a good fake, but even we get it wrong sometimes. (And that's the most shocking fact of all!) So join us as we take a look back at some incredibly scandalous true-life celebrity shenanigans that turned out to be not-so-true after all ... and even one that was.

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· The Britney Spears Sex Tape

We all wanted that one to be true, but sadly, that was just the beginning of the end for America's fairy tale couple.

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· The Alyson Hannigan Sex Tape

To this day, you can still find paysites that are trying to pass this off an authentic exclusive, even though no one really believed it in the first place.

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· The Adriana Lima Sex Tape

We would have totally bought that a Victoria's Secret supermodel would fuck on tape, except that virgins don't generally fuck on tape. Or Victoria's Secret supermodels for that matter.

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· American Idol contestant Antonella Barba's blowjob

We were never 100% sure if these were definitively proven to be her or not, but that's beautiful thing about interent scandals: It's not a lie if you believe it!

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· Vanessa Hudgens Nude Cell Phone Pics

The craziest thing about these pictures wasn't that they involved the star of a Disney show, but that they were actually her! (She also may have taken them for a boy who isn't really into girls, but that's another story).

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· Kristin Davis' Old Nudie Pics

Some people are apparently still on the fence about this one, but unless someone has a really detailed picture of Kristin Davis' elbows we're not buying it.

The Times Online can't believe how crazy...

Lux Alptraum — Mon, 17 Mar 2008 12:04:09 EDT

The Times Online can't believe how crazy web porn has gotten — Isabella Rossellini as a bug? Hot babes with falcons? Wild! Let's just hope they don't stumble on Genki Genki anytime soon. (technology.timesonline.co.uk)

We hope you're sitting down for this: it...

Dashiell Bennett — Mon, 25 Feb 2008 12:19:02 EST

We hope you're sitting down for this: it turns out that the profiles of hot women used to lure customers to sexy online chat rooms are — gasp — not real! You mean to say that people sometimes pay for sexual services that are just ... a fantasy? We don't know what to believe anymore. (blogto.com)

Shanghiist has put together a complete recap/update...

Dashiell Bennett — Tue, 05 Feb 2008 09:27:14 EST

Shanghiist has put together a complete recap/update of that Hong Kong celebrity sex scandal that has us Westerners so confused. Now with YouTube apologies and secret unnamed participants! This would be so shocking if only we knew why these folks were famous! (shanghaiist.com)

Just like our friends in the Catholic community,...

Dashiell Bennett — Thu, 31 Jan 2008 10:26:40 EST

Just like our friends in the Catholic community, we are outraged by this ad depicting nuns enjoying a nude life drawing class—but mostly because it doesn't make any sense. We're all for nudity, but what do nuns in art class have to do with joining an overpriced gym? (kcci.com + whdh.com)

Sexploitation Clip Of The Week: "Gutter Girls"

Dashiell Bennett — Thu, 24 Jan 2008 14:20:42 EST

We had to take a break for a while from all those crazy uninhibited chicks who shock and intimidate us with their groovy sexed up lifestyles, but this week sees the return of those kinds of girls who go all the way and then ask why! We're so lucky to have not grown up in the sixties when wild and way out sex cults terrorized the populace with their sinful ways—not like the innocent upstanding young ladies you meet on the internet these days.

· "Gutter Girls," a.k.a. "The Yellow Teddybears" (1963) (imdb.com)
· Clip courtesy of Bedazzled Blue

Previously: Sexploitation Clip Archive

Carla Bruni Makes French Politics Interesting

Dashiell Bennett — Tue, 22 Jan 2008 16:04:09 EST

Have you heard about the scandalous political scandal that has all of France positively ... er, scandalized? We don't read the papers much, but from what we've gathered some dude who's like the president or something totally cheated on his wife and unlike in some countries (ahem) French people are usually down with the whole world leaders having mistresses thing, except that this dude dumped his wife in the middle of a campaign (maybe?) and then (probably?) married his hottie model-singer girlfriend who loves to hang out on beaches in her bikini. Again, our grasp of parliamentary procedure in the European Union is a little weak, but we consulted several political science manuals and this photo gallery and came to the conclusion that Carla Bruni is pretty much the hottest thing to come out of Paris since Freedom Fries. Isn't international diplomacy awesome?

· Carla Bruni Bikini Pictures (egotastic.com)

English Teacher Acts In Sexy Commercial, Corrupts Youth

Dashiell Bennett — Fri, 18 Jan 2008 16:54:42 EST

Everyone knows from watching movies that private schools appear on the surface to be stuffy, uptight institutions of higher learning, but underneath they are actually lusty dens of sin and vice. So we can't figure why Britian would be so shocked to learn that a private school English teacher can be seen having (not really) sex with a randy construction worker on YouTube. This fantasy ad has been online for some time already, and while it might be creepy in a "women are all dirty sluts who crave hardhat cock" sorta way, we wouldn't call it "shocking soft-porn." (Decide for yourself below. They even use a condom!) But if a low-paid teacher can't make a little non-nude acting money during summer breaks, then there's definitely a lesson to be learned in there somewhere.

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· Scruffs Hardwear Commercial (YouTube)
· "Pupils discover their teacher in 'shocking soft-porn' advert" (dailymail.co.uk)

Any doubts about Amy Fisher's involvement...

Dashiell Bennett — Thu, 03 Jan 2008 14:58:17 EST

Any doubts about Amy Fisher's involvement with or assent to the DVD distribution of her homemade sex adventure are probably erased by the news that she will be the special guest DJ at her own sex tape release party. So we're going to go out on a limb and say that she's cool with the whole thing.

Top 10 Celebrity Sex Moments Of 2007: Famous People Get Naked Too

Dashiell Bennett — Thu, 27 Dec 2007 13:53:26 EST

Lists make excellent fodder for easy end-of-the-year posts, in much the same way that a celebrity nipple or embarrassing bikini malfunctions makes for easy rest-of-the-year posts. (You don't know what it's like sitting around on a slow news day begging for someone like Sharon Stone to forget her sense of decency for a moment until you've walked a mile in our shoes.) But if famous people didn't periodically lose their minds and do something naughty, all of our lives would be a lot less boring. It's true that some of the folks on this list of our favorite celebrity moments of 2007 have even been know to make movies or albums on occasion, but generally those aren't nearly as entertaining.

Check out some of the moments that kept our jobs interesting this year after the jump.

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10

Not Meg White
Sometimes the best sex scandals are the ones that aren't true. Did White Stripes rhythm section Meg White really bang some college student in his dorm and let him film it? Does it even matter?

9

Britney's Downward Spiral, Stage 3
So ... um ... yeah ... that happened. Moving on ...

8

Hayden's Barely Legal Year
Another hot young babe had her "it's no longer creepy" party, to be followed next year by her "whatever happened to?" fiesta (i.e., her 19th birthday).

7

Everybody's Preggers!
Salma. Christina. Halle. Jessica. J-Love. Jaime-Lynn? (No comment on that one.) Everyone seems to have forgone the sexy on-camera Hollywood screwing for the private, baby-making kind. On the plus side, bigger boobs are always nice.

6

Anything Sienna Miller Does. Ever.
Seriously, we're not sure if this gal even owns a shirt, much less knows how to wear one, but we're just glad that her dedication to the cause of the celebrity nudity is so strong and vital.

5

Amy Fisher Understands A Good Press Event
Step aside, all you amateur scandalebrities: let a real tabloid veteran show you how it's done!

4

Natalie Portman's Ass
Better in theory than in iPod-quality practice, but any chance to see Ms. Portman sans culottes is a chance we're never going to pass up.

3

Kim Kardashian: Superstar?
The Paris Hilton "famous for being famous while having sex" phenomenon comes full circle, as her former sidekick parlays her fame by association into a TV show, a Playboy shoot and the worst Vivid video of all time. But at least she's not shy.

2

Vanessa Hudgens' Graduation Gift
Even gay men agree: don't send your high school musical boyfriend full-frontal nudie pics unless you're absolutely sure he can be trusted to not share them with ~~all his friends~~ Planet Earth. (P.S. You can't.)

1

Vanessa and Nick's Excellent Adventure
While they are not the biggest names on this list, the Mexican hot tub dance between pseudo-celebrities Nick Lachey and Vanessa Minnillo was quite possibly our biggest story of the year. We hope that had more to do with the revelation of Vanessa's generous bush than Nick's pained o-face, but the moral, as always, is that watching famous people do dirty things is a terrific way to pass the time.

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Honorable Mention: Sharon Stone's Outrageous Cameltoe, Marisa Tomei Wakes The Dead, and Mr. Skin's Top 20 Nude Scenes Of 2007

Let's be honest—is anyone really surprised...

Dashiell Bennett — Wed, 26 Dec 2007 17:01:59 EST

Let's be honest—is anyone really surprised that noted tantric fuckers Sting and Trudy Styler would have naughty Helmut Newton photos displayed over their bordello-red satin bedsheets? We're actually a little disappointed that there isn't some kind of sex swing or penis shrine in there, but maybe the press didn't get to photograph that corner of the room. (dailymail.co.uk)

Shocking New Evidence Proves Heather Mills Was Once Naked, Again

Dashiell Bennett — Tue, 04 Dec 2007 11:44:25 EST

If British tabloids had ears, they would have had steam coming out of them this weekend as they angrily reported that the former wife of a former Beatle was a dirty liar. Those of you old enough to remember the summer of 2006 may recall the horrible scandal of Paul McCartney's ex, Heather Mills, whose infamous "porno past" was revealed by The Sun. Well, now the papers have caught her again and this time it's for something much more dangerous and naughty: semantics!

You see, despite the fact that those were clearly her tits covered in whipped cream and man-spit, Heather claimed that the book those saucy pics appeared in was for "educational purposes" and not "porn." Fair enough, we suppose, but it didn't change the fact that the whole planet saw her bush. The tabloids couldn't let that little detail go, however, and just a scant 18 months later they've finally proved their point. Someone found pictures of Mills taken from an actual porno mag, complete with an actual sexy quote that we're sure she totally said. ("I'm gonna drive you crazy with my body." Hot!) As News of the World breathlessly reports, "clearly there is NOTHING educational about today's sickening photo" that they bravely published anyway just to prove she's a "sleazy" lying whore.

Except they're the same fucking photos, or the same shoot anyway, probably bought off the photographer after the fact and thrown into some low-rent wank book. But her legs are spread a little wider, which totally makes her a "hardcore porno queen," which means she's totally full of it, which it means ... uh, we don't know what that means. Except for maybe News of the World should stop the moral outrage and just admit the fact that it loves pussy.

· "Shocking full frontal pics that prove Mucca is a porn liar" (newsoftheworld.co.uk)
· "Hey, Guess Who Totally Lied When She Said She'd Never Posed Nude?" (evilbeetgossip.film.com)

Previously: (Still More) Heather Mills (Not So) Hardcore Pics

Breaking: Professional Model Sells Body To Make A Living

Dashiell Bennett — Mon, 19 Nov 2007 16:17:35 EST

Sophie Anderton is part of the new breed of celebrities who are pretty much famous just for being famous and are prime targets for tabloid newspapers even though no one can remember why the tabloids ever cared about them in the first place. Naturally, we only know her name because of a sex tape scandal that seemed kind of silly at the time, but now sounds perfectly plausible after a British paper caught her in a "sex sting." A "reporter" for the News Of The World pretended to be a businessman, hired Sophie for a "date" and then filmed her doing a whole bunch of embarrassing things (like cocaine) and offering to bring herself and a friend on a three-day sex trip to the Bahamas for £15,000 a night.

We suppose it's somewhat shocking that a beautiful woman known primarily for her body and semi-public sexual escapades would offer herself up as an extremely high-priced call girl to lonely businessmen, but at the same time, we're still a bit puzzled by this entirely manufactured scandal. Why would a "journalist" (using the term very loosely) go to the trouble of such an operation simply to embarrass a perfectly harmless woman? Why stand by like a drooling voyeur, egging her on in her dangerous behavior, only so you could later turn around and tsk-tsk her like a gossipy judgmental neighbor. Why lie, cheat, and (possibly) break the law just for a juicy story?

Oh, right ... money. Which is exactly why she fucks strange business men in the Bahamas. What a whore, huh?

· "Celeb star Sophie Anderton is £10k hooker and coke dealer" (newsoftheworld.co.uk, via goldenfiddle.com)

Previously: Sophie Anderton Sex Tape Rumors

A Virginia newspaper editorial actually comes...

Dashiell Bennett — Mon, 12 Nov 2007 13:30:36 EST

A Virginia newspaper editorial actually comes to the defense of the local porn shop saying the city prosecutor is wasting taxpayers' time and money by going after the store. Also: "If it manages to stay in business, then it obviously isn't violating community standards." Gee, that's so crazy it almost makes sense. (roanoke.com)