10) War Machine Goes Porn Machine: True, War Machine was only a celebrity to those who are really into MMA—but he still was enough of a star for his crossover into porn to be a significant news story.

9) Anne Heche in "Spread: Who doesn't want to see Anne Heche topless and getting groped? Obviously, all of you did.

8) Ashley Greene: Naked on the Internet?: Annoying as it may be, we do have to thank the "Twilight" franchise for making us aware of Ashley Greene...and Ashley Greene for (allegedly) making these nude photos available to the public.

7) Scenes from the Leighton Meester Sex Tape: And speaking of naked teen idols: "Gossip Girl" Leighton Meester's sex tape may not have looked all that interesting...but hey, Leighton Meester was enough to carry it to popularity.

6) New Nudes of Vanessa Hudgens: And because naked teen idols come in threes: Vanessa Hudgens also had nude pictures surface (again)...but since she's got good lawyers, the pix disappeared from the internet about as quickly as they appeared.

5) Alans Morissette (Sorta) Goes Topless on "Weeds": Alanis's topless scene was one of the most hyped bits of TV nudity this year...and, sadly, one of the most disappointing.

4) Rihanna's (Alleged) Naked Pix: We may never know if these are really, truly Rihanna...though if she keeps taking her clothes off for album covers, we might be able to get pretty close to confirming. UPDATE: Turns out Rihanna did confirm. Our suggestion that she keep taking her clothes off still stands.

3) (Fake) Katy Perry Nude: While Rihanna's alleged nudes could still be her, this picture of "Katy Perry" unfortunately wasn't.

2) The Miss Universe Sex Tape: Most celebrity sex tapes are boring and badly shot. Anya Ayoung-Chee, however, really knows how to shine in front of the camera. Can someone tell us why Vivid never offered her a million dollar contract?

1) Eric Dane, Rebecca Gayheart, and Kari Ann Peniche Make The World's Most Boring Sex Tape: And it wouldn't be a celebrity scandal list without a mention of the Eric Dane/Rebecca Gayheart/Kari Ann Peniche tape. True, it was boring...but at least we all got to see McSteamy's wang.

We're not really sure what sort of proof is required (a sex tape? A voicemail? Dirty pictures?), or what her contract would entail—but then again, Vivid probably doesn't either. Who needs a well thought out business plan when you can get tons of publicity off some half-baked porn contract promise you'll never have to follow up on?

· Vivid Offers $1 Million for True Tiger Riding Tales (avn.com)

The very brief "sex tape" currently lives on 4tube, where—if you are so inclined—you can watch ten seconds of what appears to be Tila Tequila giggling and holding a penis. Actually, less than ten seconds, because part of that time is taken over by a shot of a dude's face (presumably the dude who the penis in question belongs to).

With any luck, this is just a teaser of a larger clip, and not the whole thing...because if it is, we're really going to have to raise the bar for what constitutes scandal, people.

· Tila Tequila Sex Tape leaked blowjob scene (4tube.com)
· Tequila Threatens Lawsuit Over Stolen Sex Tape (tmz.com)

As it is with all sex tape stars and starlets, it's important to remember that there's more to Shauna Sand than the scandal surrounding her personal porno. Between modeling, acting, and designing she somehow finds time to be a mother. Even when life gets messy (and, as you will read, it really does), she takes everything one step at a time. As you click through this phone interview with a gallery of sex tape stills, you'll discover that Shauna is a multi-faceted woman (you might even like her, we do).

· Shauna Sand Exposed (shaunssandexposed.com)

Fleshbot: What have you been up to recently? Any new projects in the works?
Shauna Sand: I was in Paris for a while. And I did a TV show there because I speak French. And I did a magazine cover. So that was really a lot of fun for me. And I'm going to start filming…a reality show for Germany called Red. And I'm appearing on Leave It To Lamas, which is on the E channel, and that should be airing this week or next week.

What first got you interested in nude modeling?
Well, you know, I've lived in Europe, and you go to the beach a lot without a top; I was always very comfortable with my body. When I was 19, my friend worked at Playboy out in Mexico and he offered me to do the cover… I was a student in France, and my mom said if I ever did that she would disown me, so, you know, I didn't do it, but I wanted to. And when I graduated from school in Paris, then I went back to San Diego to film Renegade, that's where I met Lorenzo [Lamas], my second husband, and I told him that I wanted to do Playboy…. He said, "Don't do Playboy Mexico," because he was friends with an editor of Playboy America, and that would be a better magazine for me to be in…. I sent them like a composite of what I looked like with makeup and a different variety of looks, and then what I look like at five in the morning, naked, with no makeup, crawling out of bed.… So they showed them to Hef, and he just went crazy and I shot right away, my centerfold, and I did a bunch of videos. And I worked with them for a while.

Image of Shauna Sand courtesy of Vivid (vivid.com)

Speaking of videos (poor segue, I apologize), you mentioned in an interview with TMZ that you had made several sex tapes with your boyfriend. Is it something you regularly do?
When I said videos I was referring to Playboy videos that I did...for Playboy TV. As far as um…other videos, like sex tapes, I do have a few. I locked them up in a safety deposit box because I don't want them getting out, but my third husband who's a complete psychopath has a few that he better not release or he's gonna have a big problem.

We'll definitely give him the word. How do you feel about porn in general? Do you watch any?
Not really. I don't. I've watched very little porn in my life. I think it's more of the perverted boyfriends and husbands that I've had that wanted to shoot me, you know? It's not really something that I do on a regular basis. Although, I like making them, I have a lot of fun.

Image of Shauna Sand courtesy of Vivid (vivid.com)

One of the most popular stills from your tape is of you, dripping with ice cream. I'm sure a lot of us are wondering: what's your favorite ice cream?
Haagen Daas, my favorite! It's melted. I ordered it and I went down to the bar to get some wine and I came back and it was melted. My boyfriend was tired and he wanted to go to sleep, so I had to wake him up. It was a big sticky mess though.

Image of Shauna Sand courtesy of Vivid (vivid.com)

Do you often combine food with sex?
It's not something I do on a regular basis, and I'll only do it if it's in a hotel because it's a big mess, gets all over the sheets; it's a disaster. I mean, I'll do anything, but it's not something I do on a regular basis. It was worth it but it's better if someone else cleans up the next day. I did do that once [before] with an ex-fiancée. We decided to order strawberries with whipped cream and a lot of chocolate, melted chocolate. It was the biggest mess you've ever seen, but it was in a hotel so it was ok. I highly recommend only doing that in a hotel. It was all over the towels, the bathroom, the walls; it was like… I don't think they were very happy with me after that. I think I've been banned from that hotel.

What, to you, makes someone "sexy?"
I've had a thing with French people. I've been married to two of them, and then this guy in the tape I've been with-he's not my boyfriend anymore-for six months. I think it's, like, accents-I only speak French to them so it doesn't really make sense. But I think that they just have something that's very sexy and charismatic about them. Italian people as well.

Image of Shauna Sand courtesy of Vivid (vivid.com)

These days, a lot of celebrities have been making sex tapes and releasing them to the public. When you were making this tape, did you ever imagine that other people would be seeing these private moments?
No. Absolutely not. And when I found that it had been stolen and stuff I really went into shock. I was pretty upset for a week. But then I realized that I should accept it and see it as something positive because it is a beautiful tape. I made it with somebody I really loved and we were having probably one of the best times that I had in my life. So I thought I would take control of the movie. I did the editing, I put the music in, I chose the scenes that I thought were the sexiest-I mean, there's still some stuff that was raunchier, but I thought that we were having a lot of fun and really enjoying each other. I had to subtitle it as well because the majority of it is in French, so I sat there for like 40 hours subtitling it. I was in the editing room for four days, ten hours a day…. When I was done editing it I watched the whole thing in its entirety to make sure that it flowed and everything was perfect, and then I realized: everybody's going to be seeing this. And then I got really freaked out, and then I went to a bar and had a drink. But now I've accepted it.

Image of Shauna Sand courtesy of Vivid (vivid.com)

Do you plan on making more home videos?
I never know what I'm going to do in the future. I'm not planning on it, I wasn't planning on getting into the porn industry, but hey, who knows? You know?

If you had a personal motto, what would it be?
Stay positive in life, and enjoy every moment to the fullest.

Is there anything you'd like to plug/endorse?
Shauna Sand Exposed! That's it!

Image of Shauna Sand courtesy of Vivid (vivid.com)

Because Ms. Prejean's age is currently disputed, we're going to refrain from posting the image in full—but if you're really determined to see it, it shouldn't be all that hard to find. Though frankly, we'd much rather watch Alexis Texas as porno Carrie Prejean—what can we say? We prefer our masturbation material to be created by people we actually respect.

UPDATE: The still's source? This porn tape. Theoretically, it could be Carrie...but we're not holding our breath.

By now, you've probably seen the breathtaking photo spread of January Jones in November's GQ Magazine. Supposedly, quite a few people have been murmuring about the cover photo (seen above), and whether or not GQ enhanced Ms. Jones' breasts to make them look bigger. GQ released a quick rebuttal last Thursday saying the accusations are false. Still, some folks continue to sip the hater-ade.

Anyhow, altered or not, you should enjoy the following photos.

· Photos via GQ.com. (gq.com)

The Foundry, the advertising agency that skankified the classic character, said they "challenged the consumer's notion of what this beer was," and we couldn't agree with them more. Allegedly, the dwarves (dwarfs?) represent seven types of drunks, but they could just as easily represent the seven types of post-coital emotions. It must be some damn good beer.

If Disney were smart, they'd put all this bad blood aside and cast Megan Fox in the Ho White full-length feature (she kinda looks like Megan Fox, doesn't she?). All this press is just going to sell more raspberry ale and cartoon porn, and Disney isn't doing anything to capitalize on that. Keep your pimp hand strong, Disney.

· AdFreak.com (adweek.com)
· AdelaideNow (news.com.au)

No need to drum up all this scandal and drama about your "stolen" sex tape. If you'd just admitted that hey, you like doing it, and you think the rest of the world should watch you in action, we wouldn't think any less of you. In fact, we'd probably think more of you for having the guts to stand up and say, "Hey world, I like banging! On camera, even!"

· Vivid (vivid.com)

*****

Previously: Shauna Sand in Fight with Vivid Over Sex Tape

According to TMZ, Shauna admits that she and her boyfriend made a tape earlier this year, but that she hasn't given Vivid the rights to it. Vivid, on the other hand, claims they bought the tape from a third party, and are within their legal right to release it.

Which just leaves one question: how on earth did Shauna Sand make a sex tape this year and not realize that it would be in Vivid's hands within a matter of months? Unless her rage is just a ploy to drum up interest in another doubtless uninteresting celebrity porno...

· Shauna Sand to Block Sex Tape (tmz.com)

Seriously, a woman takes her top off and dances around, and all people can say is that she looks fat? How about, "OMG, we are so lucky to be blessed with the opportunity to see even more boobs, thank you, Aubrey O'Day, for celebrating your sexiness with us?"

That would be way more appropriate.

· Aubrey O'Day addresses Peepshow nude photo (youtube.com)

Though her engagement with Mr. Hyman became a, ahem, shootus interruptus, young Kathleen has posed naked before, for other photographers. Animal New York has a set of the naked activist shot by Ned Rosen—and though it's not as naked as the full frontal fashions of Zach Hyman, and it isn't in the Met, well...at least we get to see some of Kathleen Neill's bits. And that's worth something, right?

· Kathleen Neill's Other Nude Photo Shoot (animalnewyork.com)
· Pigs Can't Handle Nudie Photog Taking Nudie Pics of Nudie Model (gawker.com)

Instead, this fall will see the release of "The Sex Files: A Dark XXX Parody," a film largely identical to "The X-Files: A Dark XXX Parody," but with no "X-Files" trademark (and, we hear, totally renamed characters). But hey, as long as it involves a redheaded Kimberly Kane getting naked and dirty, does it really matter if it's "The X-Files" or "The Sex Files" or "The XXX Files"?

We thought not.

· New Sensations Draws Fire From 20th Century Fox Over ‘X-Files' Parody (more @ xbiz.com)
· Image via Kimberly Kane (blog.kanearmy.com)

The latest edition in our cavalcade of celebrity sex tapes: Eric Dane, Rebecca Gayheart, and Kari Ann Peniche (known for "Grey's Anatomy," Noxema commercials, and beauty pageants/sex work respectively) all got together one day, did some drugs, and got naked. And taped themselves. Is it shocking? Not really: in fact, it's rather tame (perhaps even more boring than "Kim Kardashian, Superstar"!).

Will we ever get to a point where we can just admit that this is normal? That it's not shocking to learn that a celebrity made a sex tape...because we've all made a sex tape? Probably not: but we'll keep hope alive. When we're not busy trying to find deep meaning in furiously masturbating to Eric, Rebecca, and Kari's drugged up naked ramblings.

UPDATE: By popular demand: a high(er) quality still of Eric Dane's wang. Click to enlarge:

· Dane's Anatomy: McSteamy, His Wife and a Fallen Beauty Queen's Naked Threesome (gawker.com)

Previously In Celebrity Sex: Gene Simmons Sex Tape, Leighton Meester Sex Tape, Hoopz Sex Tape, Amy Fisher Sex Tape, Paris Hilton Sex Tape

Ashley Greene (taxidrivermovie.com)
Ashley Greene (taxidrivermovie.com)
Ashley Greene (taxidrivermovie.com)

(Of course, in our fantasy, all the students are of legal age, and after the footage is discovered, everyone has a big orgy. Why can't real life be more like that?)

· Teacher sends kids home with sex tape of herself (metro.co.uk)

Interestingly, Mr. Skin already passed on the video—when it was being offered for $100,000. What's that saying? "If at first you don't succeed...ask for more money"?

· Gossip Girl' Star's Sex Tape Going for $1 Mil (avn.com)