Chloe: Back In Action (And On Her Back)

Chloe (AKA Chloe Nichole) has been dubbed the "Linda Blair of Porn"—and for good reason. In action, she is a woman possessed: and thanks to Tom Byron, we have a chance to see her, in action, again. More »

Porn After 60: Take The Survey!

Are you barely senile? Are you watching golden showers in your golden years? Are you whacking when your peers are heart-attacking? A survey commissioned by New York University seeks to pinpoint sexegenarians' porn consumption and see what trends still make the sap rise. More »

Could Elder Porn Become The New Child Porn?

Could Massachusetts really make it illegal to feature anyone over 60 in a pornographic film? Has the state never heard of performers like Dave Cummings and Shigeo Tokuda? More »

Katrin Trautner Brings Morning Love To The Twilight Years

The life cycle of pornstars is—to misquote Hobbes—sexy, brutal, and short. Seemingly overnight, barely legal teens blossom into college coeds, morphing into milves shortly thereafter—and don't even ask about the whereabouts of those fuckable grandmas. More »

Nursing Homes More Accepting Of Old People Sex

Perhaps inspired by such eldersex pioneers as Shigeo Tokuda and Dave Cummings, nursing homes are warming to the idea of their residents having sex. Which, we must say, we find rather encouraging: maybe by the time we're old enough to move into a nursing home, the staff will have warmed to the idea of wing-wide orgies and resident sex parties. (foxnews.com)

Dave Cummings, The World's Second Oldest Pornstar

Step aside, Shigeo Tokuda; it's time for America's oldest working pornstar to get some press attention. Sure, Dave Cummings is six years younger than Tokuda, but his hard work has done our country proud, and it's time for someone to sit up and take notice. And by someone, we mean San Diego 6 News, who recently profiled Cummings. Clip after the jump. More »

Sandy Kane: The World's Worst Singing Stripper

People like to do crazy things to get attention—like competitive eating or growing a handlebar mustache or, ahem ... blogging. Or they can take their clothes off while singing their own made up novelty songs about hookers and blowjobs. Sandy Kane is sort of like a cross between Belle Starr, "Weird Al" Yankovic and that "Chocolate Rain" guy on YouTube. She's old (not that there's anything wrong with that), she has an awful voice, and she's possibly a racist ... but try watching this video of her version of "Gloria" without finding yourself mesmerized. We can't really judge her stripping abilities based on this, but the singing is definitely not going to help with the tips. More »

Looking Good In A Bikini At Sixty—Not Just For Oscar Winners Anymore!

Inspired by Dame Helen Mirren's bold display of flesh, other sexy sixty-somethings are coming out of the closet about their own love of skimpy swimwear. With all these bikini-clad GILFs floating around, it's no wonder all those old people are getting laid so much. (mirror.co.uk)

Helen Mirren Is Aging Better Than You Are

We think that what we love most about the summer is how it brings all the hot, young, sexy celebrities out the beach to frolic in their bikinis. You know, girls like Helen Mirren. Wait ... is this the same Helen Mirren who won an Oscar for playing Queen Elizabeth (the old one) and turns 63 years old this month? Because ... dang. She actually looks really good in that two piece! Those aren't even Photoshopped glossy magazine abs either! We guess that's why she's Dame Helen Mirren to you commoners. More »

Liberté, Egalité, And Confused Looking European People Having Sex In Fancy Costumes: Happy Bastille Day!

We tried to find you some hot French Revolution porn to help celebrate Bastille Day today; we came up with this assortment of very odd 18th century "mature" cosplay smut instead. Hey, at least we tried. If you close your eyes, you can pretend they're at least speaking French if you want to—in fact, closing your eyes might be the best way to deal with this stuff anyway. (TGP/preview galleries @ retromature.com, via Ask Jolene)

It seems the Japanese aren't just into really kinky things like extreme tentacle porn and noseplay hentai — they're also into watching old people do it too! We're eagerly awaiting that next issue of "Extremely Legal" to arrive—let's just hope our copy makes it through customs. (time.com)

Slate shares a touching—and slightly disturbing—story about an 95-year-old man and an 82-year-old woman who met in a nursing home and fell in love, until their kids found out they were boning and had them separated. (Children are such a buzzkill!) No one wants to walk in on their 95-year-old dad getting a blowjob, but seriously: what do you do when two people suffering from dementia decide they want to start having sex? We just hope we're lucky enough to still get lucky if we're lucky enough to live that long. (slate.com)

Flesh Flicks: Daddy's Girl's Best Friend

Summer is officially here as of this weekend; you might even have a pool party in your plans over the next few days to celebrate the occasion. If so, make sure you show up on time and don't forget to bring your swimsuit—unless you have another reason for being there, like seducing your best friend's parent. In that case, by all means show up after everyone has gone home, drop your towel and work your magic. In this era of MILF hegemony, it's nice to see that there are some Dads Who May At Some Point Get Fucked too. More »

Helen Mirren has been given an award by the Naturist Society for ... being nude, we guess. That's a pretty noble pursuit, of course, but we had no idea they gave out prizes for it. More importantly, do they need judges? (mirror.co.uk)

The good news is that Jaime Lee Curtis is posing without a shirt on for a major national magazine cover. The bad news is that it's the AARP magazine, because if you've been lusting after her since "Halloween' and "Trading Places," you are officially old. (nydailynews.com + aarpmagazine.com)

Flesh Flicks: A May-December Technology Romance

Hey, remember the VCR? For any youngsters who might be reading this, those "tracking" symbols at the beginning of this clip indicate that it was recorded on something known as "video tape," an ancient magical invention used to visually steal people's souls and also trade pornography. That means that this archaeological find is so dated that the mature old man and his (not really) MILF maid who star in it are most likely dead by now. If you still don't know what we're talking about, just ask your parents to tell you about their old porn collections. It may feel uncomfortable, but it's a great way to learn about history! More »

Amateur Thumblog Starts Off The New Year Right

If your new year's resolutions involve spanking it to less overproduced studio material and more quality amateur stuff (and whose doesn't?), allow us to help make things easier for you by directing your attention to this thumblog. Despite its title, it's not so much a protest against the nefarious policies of the Recording Industry Association of America than a lovingly curated tribute to the wide and wonderful world of homemade smut, from sexy swingers to blowjob-hungry grannies and tiny-titted webcam gals and just about everything in between. In fact, it's even inspired us to start making our own dirty home videos to share with all of you in the new year. (Whether or not you'll want to watch them, though, is a different story, But at least our heart's in the right place.) More »

Speaking of NC-17 and other things innocent eyes should not see, is there a Hollywood double standard when it comes to flabby old men taking their clothes off? If Bob Hoskins and Harvey Keitel can do it, why not Kathy Bates? Or to put it another way: Why is Bob Hoskins always taking his clothes off? (latimes.com)

Speaking of calendars, the other trend of old people getting it off for charity does not seem to be ending anytime soon. Here's hoping Keyla still looks this good when she's 100. (canoncitydailyrecord.com + telegraph.co.uk)

Flesh Flicks: Pilfered MILFs

Yes, MILFs are everywhere. However, we're noticing another trend that seems to go hand-in-hand with the rise of middle-aged female predators, but is much more disturbing — TSDPTBSRTIOTBMs. That's "Thirty-Something Dudes Pretending To Be Semi-Retarded Teenagers In Order To Bang MILFs." We're guessing the actual age difference between the two protagonists in this backyard play is somewhere in the single digits, but somehow this guy is able to parlay a backwards baseball cap and slurred speech into every schoolboy's fantasy come true ... only without the schoolboy. Not to mention the fact that he's taking a gardening job away from an actual high schooler who would gladly rake leaves for minimum wage. Talk about screwing with the fabric of society! More »

A 43-year-old mother of four has taken to nude dancing in order to prove you don't have to be wafer thin to be sexy (or raise money with a nude calendar, natch.) It's just like "The Full Monty," but with tits. (eveningtimes.co.uk)

Betty Weider: Queen Of The Fitness Babes

If you like watching other people sweating as much as we do, you're probably familiar with Joe Weider, who founded magazines like Muscle & Fitness and Flex and built a bodybuilding empire with nothing but a nice set of pecs and a dream. (He also foisted Arnold Schwarzenegger on a unsuspecting America, but that's another story.) If you were also once a horny teenage boy like some of us were, you might also be familiar with Joe's smoking hot wife Betty, who modeled for and helped sell his fitness regime well into her sixties. She even sold more than a few impressionable young men on the idea that older women can pretty damn sexy. (And that sometime, big muscles = hot chicks!) More »

News of the World asks a 27-year-old woman why she would shack up with a man 25 years older than her. They also asked the man why he was dating her, as if the answer wasn't already completely obvious. (newsoftheworld.co.uk)

If the idea of senior citizens having sex makes you uncomfortable, suck it up. They're the reason you'll be able live in to your 80s—so you can fuck other senior citizens! (news.com.au)

Virgin is now offering to mortgage your home and plant impure thoughts about your grandparents into your brain. If we buy a stupid house, will you make it stop? (news.com.au)

Over half of all seniors are still getting it on between the ages of 65 and 74, and many more are doing it well into their 80s. So now you have something to talk to your grandparents about at Thanksgiving! (P.S. How many "last taboos" can there be ABC News?) (abcnews.go.com)