Which explains (in part) why they've released a four plus hour title starring some of your favorite cock gargling starlets, back when they were fresh and new and nearly factory sealed, their young hearts and vaginas still as indestructible like those famous plastic combs from our childhoods.

"Cum Fuck Them Young" is more than just a compilation video starring Bree Olson, Amy Ried, Ava Rose, Lacie Heart, Riley Mason, Audrey Bitoni, Carmen Kinsley, Chase Dasani, Krystal Jordan, Lindsey Meadows, Ruby Flame, Samantha Sin, and Stefanie Renee—it's also an invitation to recall those halcyon days of yonder, fleeting quickly into life's rear view mirror as we push ever further towards the great equalizer. It's one great big "carpe diem" shouted up into the face of the howling abyss, a double finger superhero salute to the darkness that threatens to strip all meaning away from this brief and wonder filled dream.

Is that too morbid? Welcome to the winter of our discontent. It's been a wild year, one where we lost too many we cherished. That being said, "Cum Fuck Them Young" is also a reminder to grab life by the tail, to chuck out that which is truly non-essential, and to embrace our animal instincts right here and now.

Seeing young and vibrant Ava Rose have her tight and tiny clam pried open again takes us back. Likewise, it fills the cockles of our hearts with joy to see a thin, bubbly Bree Olson get nailed in the ass—almost as if it is her very first time. With so many amazing starlets doing what we have grown to love them for, this release is like the "family-sized" value saver equivalent of a pornographic Costco—which is fine from time to time.

"Cum Fuck Them Young" releases next week from New Sensations. Check out this awesome gallery, exclusive to Fleshbot, then go out and seize the day!

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And when it comes to this "trouble" with young girls, well, we aren't sure what Wicked Pictures performer slash director Randy Spears is complaining about, because we weren't paying attention to the plot of this movie—at all!

First things first, though. Penthouse Pet of the Year Runner Up and Fleshbot Crush Object Shawna Lenee finds herself in a wonderfully sticky position with the hottest Italian girl we've seen in forever, Franzuaka Facella, along with little Lindsey Meadows. Geez, Randy, you had to break the big guns out right away, didn't you? Now how are we supposed to finish this movie? We just sat totally mesmerized by this luscious trio climbing tongue first into each others cracks and pink puckers. Oh, how we heart dirty little angel Shawna Lenee!

Then—as if that weren't enough—Spears gives us Wicked contract star Alektra Blue working up a naughty sweat, as the insatiable cock lover takes a beautiful fucking deep up into her sexy body. Follow that up with Penthouse Pet Tori Black in yet another incendiary ball draining scene, Brittney Amber scorching the lens, and last but oh so not least, tattooed strawberry delight Nikki Rhodes getting drilled until her entire body turns from nacre to soft pink blush.

Is there anyone out there who doesn't understand now that Randy Spears is the man? No? Good. Well done, old friend. Thank you for turning in a movie worth purchasing in these tough economic times. Trust us when we tell you the real "Trouble with Young Girls" is that Mr. Spears can't make a sequel fast enough.

"The Trouble With Young Girls" comes out this week from Wicked Pictures. You will love it.

· Wicked Pictures (wickedpictures.com)

What can we say? We're all about the wife swap, the threesome, and the down and dirty taboo busting around here. Especially when the spiciness starts out with Lindsey Meadows getting eaten raw like sushi by Stormy.

So when Wicked contract super star Stormy's newest story porn masterpiece, "The Price of Lust," hit our radar, it piqued our interest—even though it only featured two other girls, Amber Rayne and Lindsey Meadows. At least they were two amazing girls that we love watching get crazy on cock.

The plot plays out like your typical morality play—high school sweethearts experimenting with the neighbors, big city transplants trying to deny escape their kinky side by absconding to suburbia and, not entirely unlike the acclaimed philosopher of yore Thoreau, in the process uncovering the simple metaphysical truth that one cannot hide from your true nature. No matter how far you travel, the giant travels with you; though in this case, "giant" is replaced with "ravenous appetite for strange cock" and "Thoreau" with "Stormy and friends." Shockingly, friends betray each other as temptations eviscerate restraint, and the best kind of super hot sweaty guilty sex goes down. Oh, but at what price, you ask? Right. Yawn.

Honestly, we just don't understand why it always has to end in tears. Why are we still reinforcing these ridiculously outdated social mores? In our humble estimation, this is all just another case of live and learn meets all's well that ends well.

Check the gallery, which features the best pix of lithe beauty Lindsey Meadows getting straight drilled out in her hot tiny snatch like the insatiable spunk junkie she is. It's good to see her getting wild again, cause we were starting to miss her.

"The Price of Lust" releases this week from Wicked Pictures.

· "The Price of Lust" (wickedpictures.com)

With the end of the year closing around us like the razor sharp mouth of a feral animal, and the storm ravaged nation in a debilitating recession, the darkness appears to be creeping ever closer. What magical unicorn of sexiness could rescue us from the cold silky dream of a sweet, efficient suicide?

Award winning Adam & Eve director James Avalon offers us his definitive reply—simplicity.

That's right, he's returning to the essentials by stripping down our fantasies to their basic ignorant impulses. He's run the gamut from early gonzo goofiness to high-end glossy "big budget" features with such frivolous extras as acting, post production effects, scripts, and roller skates, all with mixed results. Only now has he returned back home where he belongs; in a mindless arena, exploring the warm, slick, blossoming of several nubile debutantes as they explore the thrilling benefits that await them at the gates of womanhood.

"Bikini Pick Ups" gives us precisely that—beautiful, flexible, morally uninhibited starlets wearing bikinis and getting picked up, then humping their young hearts out. Point. Set. Match. Period. Clean up now. Moving on.

Avalon assembles Lindsey Meadows, Ann Marie Rios, Jessie Alba, Cameron Love, and delightful pixie princess Veronique Vega, whose vagina is as wickedly pink as it is resiliently tight. Trust us, this is a no brainer in every way. And after the year we've had, that's a good thing.

"Bikini Pick Ups" releases this week from Adam & Eve.

· Adam & Eve (adameve.com)

Carlos Batts' "Young Hollywood" is a little like the Grover's Corners of "Our Town": everyone knows each other, there is a kindly narrator and, as the spirit of Death is ever-present in Thornton Wilder's New Hampshire hamlet, so does Glenn Danzig hover above young Hollywood. The similarities end there, though, because you'd never expect Emily Webb to flash her tits to get into a music video the way Mandy Morbid does. Read our review after the gap.

. . .

Young Hollywood

Studio: Independent Adult Cinema
Director: Carlos Batts
Cast: Kimberly Kane, Mandy Morbid, Lystra, April Flores, Lindsey Meadows, Adrianna Nicole, Ashley Blue, Alex Gonz, Jerry, Steven St. Croix

Review by Gram Ponante

Actually, Mud's narration is more reminiscent of Samuel Jackson's omniscient DJ in "Do the Right Thing."

Like last year's "Boys' & Girls' Guide to Getting Down", "Young Hollywood" takes a snapshot of the short plain of city blocks south of the Hollywood sign, and makes no real distinction between porn performers and struggling actors (because there isn't one).

Morbid and Lystra fuck on the Mustang parked in Danzig's yard (it is actually Glenn Danzig's yard; the Satan-appreciating "Mother" vocalist lives in Hollywood) and later spend some topless time talking about cosplay and Comic-Con. This is a slightly more believable kind of unreality than what is found in traditional porn videos; it is only because the camera was on that their conversation seemed so awkward, because that's how the two of them actually talk.

It's not a rule, but porn shot in the San Fernando (Porn) Valley often looks different from porn shot over the hill in Hollywood and downtown L.A. We meet Kimberly Kane on the set of a movie. She fucks Steven St. Croix on an art installation chopper and makes plans on her phone for going out later. No Porn Valley McMansion and no chirpy starlet: just the angular, frank, and badass Kane in a room festooned with Atari art.

A lot of porn movies come with behind the scenes footage, and it is there where any consumer can become well-versed in what it is like to shoot a porn movie. Often this footage is ten times more entertaining than the movie it accompanies. "Young Hollywood" takes a different angle and seeks to dramatize the backstage logistics. In that way it is like an X-rated reality show.

Adrianna Nicole looks particularly sirenesque in a bathing cap on a Hollywood roof. Downstairs she gets fucked in the shadows of the venetian blinds in an empty apartment. Something about the light identifies Los Angeles - that and the fact that, if Adrianna Nicole lived on the east coast, who would ever leave?

Natural light plays more of a role in Ashley Blue's segment with Alex Gonz. It's twilight in Los Angeles and they're on the rooftop pool. This is a really good look for Blue, a very cool light.

The movie culminates at a party in Beverly Hills with fire dancers and carrying on; this scene is poorly lit and anticlimactic. But overall, "Young Hollywood" succeeds in its music, its sense of place, and its very loving photography. The statements it seeks to make about celebrity and hanging out would be more effective without the narrator telling us what we already picked up from the action, though.

Still, "Young Hollywood" paints a nice picture of Our Town; everybody gets along and looks good. It's a much better postcard for the area than the Christmas parade on Hollywood Boulevard.

· Carlos Batts (carlosbatts.com)
· Adam & Eve (adameve.com)

Read our review after the gap.

. . .

Studio: Wicked
Director: Mark Stone
Cast: Lindsey Meadows, Prseley Maddox, April ASubrey, Jayme Langford, Kayla Carrera, Kissy Kapri, Nikki Kane, Ryann Reynolds, Evan Stone, Marco Banderas, Nick Manning, Randy Spears, Marco Banderas

Review by Gram Ponante

There's a dance party for the nurses, and they'll do anything to win. Even resort to sex and martial arts.

It's movies like Kung Fu Nurses A Go-Go that remind us that the rental of two or three skimpy nurses' outfits spread over eight or so women on different shooting days is really all it takes to satisfy the porn consumer's need for a narrative.

This movie is just about pointless, but is light and charming regardless. A vignette film not featuring any of Wicked's female contract stars, it has the feel of a movie that has little to prove and little to lose.

This inspires some serious hammy acting from three of the four hammiest actors in porn: Randy Spears, Evan Stone, and Nick Manning (Steven St. Croix couldn't make it) who reappears as Mr. Thermopyles for no other reason than to refer to his character in the third person.

We meet various nurses over the course of the movie, and each informs her patient that there's a dance that night. Somehow kung fu is incorporated.

One gets the impression that there were some extra props lying around, some money was freed up, and Nick Manning happened to be driving by. "Hey! Let's make a movie!"

Porn consumers familiar with the work of the late Jim Holliday might see similarities in this movie directed by Mark Stone, in that there are nurses. Unlike Holliday's work, however, there is little scripted dialogue. The viewer can enjoy scenes of pretty women in nurses' uniforms without sitting through a self-important plot.

"Kung Fu Nurses A Go-Go" is not an important porn movie; it's just fun.

· Wicked Pictures (wickedpictures.com)
· Buy "Kung Fu Nurses A Go-Go" (gamelink.com

Read our review after the gap.

The Instigator

Studio: AmericanXcess
Director: Chris King
Cast: Moxxie Maddron, Nick Manning, Jessica Jaymes, Hillary Scott, Lindsey Meadows, Mark Davis, the song stylings of Lynam

Review by Gram Ponante

A low-budget movie with dreams of something bigger, "The Instigator" is like many porn movies with basic setups; it just so happens that Maddron is in each scene and she is the one making things happen with the likes of Hillary Scott, Lindsey Meadows, and Jessica Jaymes.

While Scott, Jaymes, and Meadows are more well-known in porn circles than Maddron, she ties the room together like Jeff Lebowski's rug. And she is also the aesthetic emissary to the band Lynam, who provide the movie's soundtrack.

Because Maddron looks like a built-for-sex metal chick more than she does a porn star, especially compared to the more petite Scott and Meadows and the more exotic Jaymes. In the movie, she serves as a good-natured wingman for her more porny co-stars.

Directed by Maddron's boyfriend Chris King, "The Instigator" starts out like a Whitesnake video, with Maddron playing Tawny Kitaen. She shakes her mane and prances around the power trio, who happen to be the love children of Ronnie James Dio and Stevie Nicks (Fun fact: Mr. Dio's real surname is Lynam.)

The movie progresses through several standard scenarios: fucking on a porn set, fucking the stripper, fucking Nick Manning (twice). A bonus scene with unacknowleded punkporn godfather Matt Zane is actually the most satisfying because Maddron seems more at home in a rock and roll atmosphere.

I liked this movie, but I felt that Maddron should make the sequel with more friends who look like her, and film it backstage at the Vans Warped Tour or something, with Metal Sludge as the media sponsor. That would rock.

· American Xcess (americanxcess.com)
· Lynam (lynam.com)
· Buy "The Instigator" (gamelink.com)

* * * * *

Previously: Reviews Archive

Not the Wayland Flowers biopic I'd been expecting but still of great use, "Memoirs of A Madame" explores the complicated power structure of the modern-day brothel and the bittersweet choices we make in passing on the torch of responsibility.

It is like "Lethal Weapon" meets "All About Eve" meets "Fantasy Island" meets "Madame's Place". Read our review of "Memoirs of A Madame" after the gap. - GP

- - -

Memoirs of A Madame

Studio: Sinsation
Director: Dee and Shy Love
Cast: Shy Love, Lindsey Meadows, Brad Hardy, Vanessa Lane, Scott Styles, Cassie Young, Mikey Butders

Review by: - GP

"I don't want to fuck fat old guys anymore," says Trixe, "I want to fuck rich fat old guys."

Since watching "The Mission" on HBO the other night, I have been fascinated with hookers and their hierarchies.

Granted, "The Mission" was about a Jesuit order in 18th century Paraguay, but the missionary followers of Ignatius Loyola share a great deal with Madame Shy, operator of a high class escort agency who just wants to get out, and Trixe, a two-dollar whore fixin' on replacing her.

What they share is Difficult Choices.

Sinsation Pictures releases artfully-shot couples' films with scripts and performers who are attractive in a way particular to hardcore couples' films rather than softcore couples' films. I came to this conclusion after seeing two people in a late-nite Cinemax movie who I'd just seen in a one-act play in Los Angeles. Does that mean that hardcore performers can't act? No, it just means that I wouldn't believe Shy Love as Nora in "The Plough And the Stars".

Anyway, the movie begins with Trixe (Meadows) in two scenes of play-acting. First she works out with her john in a seedy motel room. A slap-bass soundtrack reminiscent of a Stephen J. Cannell montage sequence plays over their dialogue, full of dirty porn-standard patter that somehow sounds like taunting:

"You like me Baby?"

"Yeah I like you. Am I the biggest you ever had?"

"Yeah Baby, you're the biggest. Am I warm and wet enough for you?"

"Yeah Baby."

Through my own exhaustive research with cheap hookers, I have found that none were as slight as Trixe, and not a single one wore fishnets. After the deed is done, Trixe looks in the mirror and practices curbside pickup lines, finishing with:

"Hey, how about you pay me a lot of money to fuck you in your mother's car and pretend you're not a loser?"

The scene switches to Madame Shy, embodying both Mr. Rourke and most of the characters Danny Glover has played: she's in a white suit and she feels like she's getting too old for this. She is looking for a replacement as a Madame.

In a tribute to softcore "bordello" movies, Shy's manner is imperious and her words are clipped. "Leave us!" she snaps to her attendants as a favored customer enters. I don't know, I have a feeling that the adult industry plays at prostitution in the way that performers of Asian extraction play at being schoolgirls. I'm sure Heidi Fleiss never said "Leave us!"

Introduced to Madame Shy, Trixe rises fast in the organization. But the other girls are jealous about being passed over by a newcomer. This also happened to Chief Justice John Roberts. Trixe breaks their spirit and builds them back up in her image by getting fucked with a strap-on.

Technical aspects of Sinsation Pictures' products are still not first rate. The soundtrack is of the type that can be purchased along with certain editing programs, and at one point it is sped up ridiculously fast to accommodate the ending of one scene and the beginning of another. And we still hear the echos common to a movie set poorly insulated from the warehouse around it.

But they are trying hard, and directors Love and Dee lend their own performing experience to staging excellent sex scenes. And the movie ends better than "The Mission" does.

· Buy "Memoirs of A Madame" (sinsationpictures.com)

Previously: DVD Review Archive