That was the moment when adult film actress Lie Lani lectured Mr. Stern, his employees (including well-known lexicographer "Will The Farter"), and the literally thousands of paid subscribers who have exclusive access to his satellite radio show on the process of cuckolding, thereby introducing the entire modern world to this previously obscure fetish that had never before been discussed in a public forum. Unfortunately, not everyone on planet Earth was tuned into that historic moment, but Ms. Lani's employer, Kick Ass Pictures, has helpfully recreated the moment in our favorite press release of the week.

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New York, NY - Tuesday the word "cuckold" officially became part of modern popular culture when it was discussed by Howard Stern and his crew on his morning radio show.

The occasion was porn star Lie Lani being on the show to plug Kick Ass Pictures, for whom she's shot four movies. To earn the plug, the sexy starlet had to endure a 60-second gas blast on her face by Will the Farter. After that feat, talk turned to the movies she had done, in particular a scene for the upcoming Cum Eating Cuckolds (street date Sep. 18).

"Cuckold? What's that?" asked Stern. He said he had heard of the term bukkake before, but had never heard of cuckold.

Lie Lani explained that - at least in the Kick Ass version - a cuckold is a humiliated husband who watches his wife have sex with a black man. "He cums in me," she explained, "and then my husband has to eat the black man's cum."

Loud groans from Stern and everyone in the studio followed the explanation.

"I can't believe there's a term for that!" commented Stern show producer Gary Dell'Abate.

"So that's what cuckold means!" said Robin Quivers.

"And this actor you worked with, he ate the black man's cum?" Stern asked dubiously.

Lie Lani affirmed that he was very into it, prompting incredulous "Wows" from both Stern and Quivers.

Lie Lani's full Cum Eating Cuckolds scene can be viewed in advance of the DVD release on www.kickass.com as today's video update. Her previous DVD appearances include Prep School Princess and Barefoot Confidential 47. Her Kick Ass bio page can be found at:

www.dvds.kickass.com/girl.php?id=903

Kick Ass Pictures is headquartered in Glendale, California and is the only porn company in the world to guarantee all natural breasts, no condoms, and all-naked sex.

· Thumbnail via Wikipedia

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Previously: This Week In Bad Press Releases Archive

Being the high-minded interlocutor that she is, Malkin opens the forum by calling her opponent skeezy and a "loser" (is that the famous Fox News reporting, or the deciding?), insults his girlfriend, then cuts them both off without caring to listen to their side of the story. Unfortunately, Doug doesn't acquit himself very well either, as he stumbles over his answers, tries to zing Michelle with comments about some fake bikini shots, then signs off with a classy one-fingered salute. (The backwards baseball cap was a nice touch, though.) Not since the Lincoln-Douglas debates of 1858 have we seen such high-minded political rhetoric in the public sphere, but we're pretty sure that neither Republicans nor pornographers should be particularly thrilled about the way their side was represented. The whole affair was disappointing to say the least, especially when you consider Michelle's usual parliamentary procedures—the ones she's actually proud of! If her political cheerleading isn't the definition of skeezy, we don't know what is.

· The O'Reilly Factor (foxnews.com)
· "The Defeatocrats' Cheer" (YouTube)
· More background @ here (vailsun.com, via otty-hotties.com)

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Previously: Masturbation: The Silent Killer, Good Morning America Enables Your Addiction, LA Daily News Exposes Porn Valley, Happy Anti-Porn Hysteria Month!, Porn: America's Addiction!

We've seen a lot of anti-porn/anti-sex/anti-fun screeds in our day, but we don't think we've ever stumbled across one as scary, wrong-headed—and just plain entertaining—as this anti-masturbation masterpiece from the otherwise legitimate-seeming newspaper, the Nigerian Tribune. It's a fascinating concoction of fear-mongering and psuedo-science featuring quotes from actual "doctors" making outrageous claims about the damage jerking off can do to your brain, nervous system and your spine! We had no clue about the awful things we (and 98% of the human population) were doing to our bodies. Among the things we're putting ourselves at risk for: nervous depression, permanent insanity, lesbianism & homosexuality, guilt (obvs), epilepsy (!), spinal irritation, premature ejaculation, sexual "coldness", and of course, death. Plus, there's the greatest scare quote in the history of dubious statistics: "It has even been documented to cause more deaths among boys in Europe than any plaque or war." We would very much like to see that documentation before we sign ourselves up for the only known cure ... amputation of the schlong. That's some tough medicine, all right.

· "MASTURBATION: Temporary sexual pleasure with many dangers" (tribune.com.ng)

Previously: Caught In The Act: Now What?, Masturbate-A-Thon 2007: Still Coming For A Cause, Masturbation Intervention: Know When To Say When, National Masturbation Month: A Hands-On Guide, Happy Anti-Porn Hysteria Month!, Good Morning America Enables Your Addiction, Porn: America's Addiction!

· "Pam Anderson Nipple Slip Conan O'Brien June 20, 2007" (YouTube)
· See also: "Things That Happened On And Around Late-Night Talk Shows Last Night" (Defamer)

Previously: Celebrity NippleWatch™ Archive

Are you ready to hear about the brand-new, completely unknown, but totally hot new fetish that is sweeping the world UK three or four bedrooms? Obnoxious frat boys have been joking for decades about girls that require "double bagging," but now perverted sexual fiends actually are putting bags over their heads during sex ... and loving it! Yesterday, The Sun of London breathless published this hard-hitting investigative report about the members of this "secretive sexual club" engaging in the "bizarre new sex game" where partners cover their heads or their lover's head with masks, pillowcases, and yes—even the proverbial brown paper bag. So hot! And how brave of The Sun to blow the lid (or bag?) off this totally underground phenomenon. We guess we just imagined all those gas masks wearers, cosplayers, furries, bondage slaves, blindfold fans, and um ... paper bag enthusiasts we run across in the past. Not to mention folks who just, you know, fuck with the lights off. We eagerly await the flood of new bagging paysites and sex shop paper products to overwhelm our inbox, but for now at least, C-list late-night talk show guests will have plenty of easy joke fodder to keep us occupied.

· "We love new sex craze bagging" (thesun.co.uk)
· Clip via Red Eye (foxnews.com)

Previously: Wild Gasmasks: Get Your (Kinky) Head On Straight, Nudes Masked

Porn history was made this week when the latest issue of "O" magazine hit the stands: it includes a two-page article on porn for women by Fleshbot gal Friday and "brazen blogger" Violet Blue which not only includes mention of the very website you're ogling right now but also some of our favorite partners in crime, including Comstock Films, Tristan Taormino, Audacia Ray, and Candida Royalle. Says an understandably giddy Violet Blue, "Do you have any idea how much the anti-porn pundits would kill for an opportunity like this to say the exact opposite about women and porn? Take that, Pure Life Ministries, Bush administration, anti-porn feminists of the past three decades. A salvo has been fired, a flag firmly planted ... How crazy-amazing and progressive is that of Oprah!?" We need never feel guilty about sitting around in our underwear all day watching daytime talk shows again!

· "Oprah puts the O in my OMFG" (tinynibbles.com)
· O, The Oprah Magazine (oprah.com)
· Order: "The Smart Girl's Guide To Porn" (Amazon)

Previously: Porn For Women: We Know You're Out There

In the midst of a hazy NyQuil hangover last Friday morning, we posted a throwaway link to an Associated Press story that appeared in the Winnipeg Sun and thought nothing of it. It looked to us like another one of your standard "Boy, our culture sure seems obsessed with sex" think pieces, but we didn't realize that the mainstream news outlets would get together and declare this to be Let's Talk About Porn Week. This particular story has shown up everywhere over the last few days—even as far away as Kuwait—as it seeks to confront the "look at me" culture and the Girls Gone Wild sexuality that seems to be overtaking us all. Sure, there are legitimate concerns that very young girls and boys can be negatively affected by a hypersexual world they aren't really ready for, but somehow blaming it all on the Naked News girls doesn't really help the situation. (Although, actually taking the time to get at least one alternative viewpoint was a refreshing touch.) It turns out that the article is the standard boilerplate that we thought it was, it just happens to be boilerplate that's got people talking. Now when is someone going to write a story about reporters who can't stop writing about sex. That would be some hard-hitting journalism.

· "Living in a porn-driven, 'look-at-me' culture" (cnn.com, among many others)

Previously: Good Morning America Enables Your Addiction, LA Daily News Exposes Porn Valley, NY Times: Porn Economy Just As Bad As The Regular One, Morning Wood: Dana DeArmond Leads Us Astray

As we've learned again this week, not all mainstream media outlets treat porn the same way. The New York Times crowd gets boring sales figures, LA Daily News fans get lurid sensationalism, and the soccer dads and housewives who watched Good Morning America this morning got ... PANIC! Perhaps you haven't heard the tale of the California minister whose marriage was nearly torn apart by his horrible internet pornography addiction, or how his efforts to hide his dark secret from his wife and her efforts to catch him in the act became a twisted game of cat and mouse. (Ooh, kinky!) It certainly is difficult to imagine how they were able to overcome a smutty surfing habit that averaged an astonishing one hour a week ... wait, what? One hour a week?! We do more than that before breakfast and that's before we even punch the clock. Maybe "addiction" means something different to Diane Sawyer than it does to us, but that's some serious freakin' willpower in our book.

· The Secret Life of a Porn-Addicted Minister (abcnews.go.com)

Previously: LA Daily News Exposes Porn Valley, NY Times: Porn Economy Just As Bad As The Regular One, Happy Anti-Porn Hysteria Month!, Porn: America's Addiction!, "Pornopolis" in the Denver Post, Beware the "Cyber Seduction", Internet Porn Hysteria on 20/20

Music peoples are all abuzz this week over the cover of UK rag NME, which features Beth Ditto, the lead singer of indie-punk stalwarts The Gossip, completely starkers. Why all the fuss? Let's just say she doesn't exactly fit the mold of your Britneys, Avrils, Duffs, Stefanis, Beyoncés, or basically any other female artist that you'll see flaunting it on the cover of any music magazine ... ever. Long time fans of the group know that Beth is not exactly shy about showing off her body, so while it has certainly gotten people talking, there seems to be a decided lack of outrage and/or shock about seeing quite that much skin on the cover a popular magazine. Perhaps it's because nothing rock stars do anymore is surprising, or maybe one publicity stunt is just as good as another? Or as one blogger puts it: "Is it because she is a 'larger than life' kind of character, making it fine to use her to sell magazines ... Or is it because there is a market for fat, nude women in pornographic positions?" Um ... can't it be both?

· The Gossip's Beth Ditto poses nude for mag (thehollywoodnews.com; more @ Idolator + brooklynvegan.com)
· "The Gossip's Beth Ditto on the cover of NME" (Flickr)
· NME Magazine (nme.com)

Previously: Corn-Fed Porn Of The Moment: "Waist Watchers", Porn Valley (Adjacent) Dispatch: Golf for Skylar Neil, Sexy(ish) Music Video Watch: Marilyn Manson Rubs It In Our Face, Sunblock Rubs You The Right Way, Queen's Naked "Bicycle Race", Cock Rock: Rockers With Their Pants Down, Son Of Still More Sexy Music Videos: Meet DVJ Bazuka, Lene Alexandra's Boobs Are (More Than Just) OK

· Ohio's new "six-foot" rule could claim some unlikely victims: NBA cheerleaders. This will not stand! (Deadspin)

· A 70-foot-long hot air balloon that looks like a naked man is floating over Milan ... and no one seems to care? Do you think Italy would trade some of its citizens for ours? (timesonline.co.uk)

· Two-thirds of women fantasize about having group sex, 20% dabble in lesbianism, and 25% have thought about being in a porn film, which oddly enough, might be a lower percentage than the number of women who have actually been in a porn film. (thesun.co.uk)

· Letters to the Editor of the Day: "Most parents are clueless about online porn." And pretty much everything else that happens to people under 21 these days. (lincolnnewsmessenger.com)

· The porn industry unveils the first Blu-ray adult feature, not counting the other Blu-ray adult features that have already come out. (tech.co.uk)

· Could someone be making gay porn in the house right next door to you? Probably not, but wouldn't your neighborhood be much more exciting if they were? (nbc6.net)

· Thumbnail via nba.com

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Previously: Morning Wood Archives/Wet Spots Archives

What makes a girl a "real girl"? Other than not being made out of metal or plastic, it's a little hard to pinpoint. Take Amii Grove, Zoo Weekly's recently crowned "Real Girl of the Year." Though it may be hard to believe that a body like hers can exist in nature, to the best of our knowledge she is not an actual robot and therefore is technically "real." On the other hand, she's the girlfriend of a Premier League soccer star and incredibly "fit," so it isn't as if she were plucked from the obscurity of a Wal-Mart checkout lane. Real becomes an even fuzzier concept when you consider the stars of Nuts' "Big Boob Issue." We're quite certain that at least a couple of these lasses are packing more than just flesh and blood in their funbags, but of course, you're never going to get your hands close enough to find out the truth. Lucy Pinder's hands have sadly returned to their previous function as nipple covers, leading us back to the eternal question: If a boob gets fondled and you're not the one to touch it, does it really exist? Try to wrap your mind around that at the next meeting of your Metaphysics Club.

· Amii Grove! Inside The Ultimate Real Girl's Bedroom! (zooweekly.co.uk)
· Amii Grove: ZOO's Real Girl Of The Year (dailyniner.com)
· NUTS: The Big Boob Issue (dailypoa.com)

Previously: This Week In Lad Mags: Girl-On-Girl Bonanza, Sophie Howard's "Bizarre" Behavior, Meet Imogen Gray: Taking Advantage Of The System, Lucy Pinder Lets It All Hang Out