Dildroid: Teledildonics For Android-Enabled Phones

Sure, we've heard a lot about how the new iPhone is going to be the best sex toy ever—but until the app store approves an equivalent to Dildroid, we're not buying it. More »

Google Okays Cellphone Vibrator App

Are you annoyed that the iPhone app store keeps censoring all the fun applications? You may be happier with a G1—just look what Google's letting into their app store. (appscout.com, thumbnail)

China: No Porn For You!

Internet giant Google China issues formal apology for being too slow, in the Chinese government's estimation, to remove all links to porn sites from its search engine. More »

According to this press release masquerading as a "news" report, employers are reportedly worried about the so-called "porn modes" in the latest version of Internet Explorer and Google's Chrome browser. We're not sure what all the fuss is about, though — after all, we spend our whole work day looking at porn, and it just makes us more productive! (marketwatch.com)

Warning: Boobs Ahead. Do You Understand And Wish To Continue?

Those of you who have spent any time on the interweb searching for smut have surely run across the warning that accompanies any Blogspot blog that someone somewhere has deemed "objectionable." Of course, Google would never actually "censor" content on their free web hosting service—they just put up a giant sign post blocking you from the site you're trying to reach, and imply that you must be some sort of twisted perv for even wanting to see it. But if you're okay with that you can go ahead and click through, you big freak. We could write a book about the silliness of that system, but we much prefer this more subtle form of protest: the "I Understand And I Wish To Continue" Award. It's given out by one Blogspot blog to others that have been thrown behind that great beige wall because their erotic content is too hot for sensitive eyes. It almost makes us wish we were on Blogspot too so that we might be eligible to win one. (Almost, that is. We're sure you understand.) More »

And speaking of fantasy worlds: it should be obvious by now, but if you build a virtual environment on the interweb the perverts will always come and stake their claim in it sooner or later. Which is to say that although Google may do all it can to keep sex and "sex rooms" out of Lively, we all know it's a losing battle. (avn.com)

The obscenity trial of Ray Guhn Productions in Florida has ended in a plea deal—interestingly, the defendants pled guilty to financial and racketeering charges, not the obscenity ones—which means we won't get to see the "Google apple pie orgy" defense in action. That's too bad, because we really love pie. (pnj.com)

Obscenity A La Mode?

Max Hardcore might have been getting all the attention lately, but another obscenity trial in Florida is currently underway where the defense is using Google search stats to prove that "community standards" are a lot broader than some people might think: apparently, searching for the term "orgy" is just as all-American as searching for "apple pie". (No word on people who search for "apple pie orgy", though—maybe even community standards have their limits.) (freespeechcoalition.com + nytimes.com)

A Manhattan doctor who was being sued by three former employees for sexual harrasment (i.e. allegedly emailing them a lot of dirty pictures) ended up suing them himself for giving him an "incurable Internet disease." (i.e., having his name end up on a bunch of porn sites when someone searches for it on Google.) The case was just thrown out, because apparently the best way to keep your name from being associated with porn on Google is to not sue people for associating your name with porn on Google. That stuff always ends up on the internet, you know. (nypost.com + searchenginewatch.com; thumbnail via Doctor's Adventures

And in domestic surveillance news this week... be careful where you flash your tits, because Google Maps is watching. (Actually we'll be watching too, but you don't have to worry about us archiving your boobs in our database for posterity. Unless they're really nice boobs.) (Gawker)

We're tickled that someone tried to use the new editable Google Maps feature to change the website of their local Republican party office to Fleshbot.com, but were not so tickled to find out that they couldn't because we "may be inappropriate" somehow. If they only knew what we know about those wild Clackamas County Republicans they'd see we weren't so inappropriate after all ... but we're not telling. (readwriteweb.com)

Keeping the kids away from the porn is hard work, but somebody has to do it; the question is who? Vivid's Steven Hirsch wants to see Google and Yahoo take an aggressive stand and develop new technologies to verify the ages of people searching for online porn. Because we all know there has to be a foolproof way to keep horny adolescents from accessing RustyTrombone.com. Er, isn't there? (afp.google.com)

Despite being the No. 1 search almost everywhere else, "sex" is Googled less frequently in China than "stocks" and other banking terms, which probably has nothing to do with the fact that government censors watch over every internet user like disapproving hound dogs. Nope, nothing to see here. (chinadaily.com.cn)

Apparently, some Google News readers get bent out of shape over having to see an uncircumcised penis in the middle of their headlines. Well, do they want information they can use or not? (seroundtable.com)

Cracked performs a much needed scientific study to determine which of the popular female names bring you the most nudity when plugged into Google Image Search. These are the questions of our age and we must have answers. (cracked.com)

Lifehacker saves our butts once again by showing us how to search Google without the overlords keeping tabs on you. (Maybe.) Oh, who are we kidding? Everyone on the planet already knows how we feel about tentacles. (Lifehacker)

Contextual advertising strikes again. Sexual or not, we can't imagine anything more harassing to a co-worker than emoticons. (searchnewz.com)

Hungary may be a worldwide porn powerhouse, but let's not forget that Argentina has a certain appeal as well. Don't take our word for it, though—if Google says it, it must be true. (google.com, via Digg)

Here's some more seemingly innocent Google Image Searches that return a surprising amount of porn. Although if you're surprised to find porn popping up in innocent image searches than you probably shouldn't be on the internet. (dmwmedia.com)

The top 6 cities that have the most people typing "porn" into Google are all in Great Britain. Hmm, maybe we should be a UK blog after all. (metro.co.uk)

Morning Wood: Brooke Burke's Miraculous Recovery

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Wet Spots: We're So Very, Very Sorry

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Wet Spots: ... And Tit Pie For Dessert

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Wet Spots: Raining Pussycats and Horny Dogs

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