Girls Gone Wild CEO Joe Francis and Hustler magazine publisher Larry Flynt are petitioning the newly convened 111th Congress to provide a financial bailout for the adult entertainment industry.

Adult industry leaders Flynt and Francis sent a joint request to Congress asking for $5 billion in federal assistance, “Just to see us through hard times,” Francis said. “Congress seems willing to help shore up our nation’s most important businesses, we feel we deserve the same consideration. In difficult economic times, Americans turn to entertainment for relief. More and more, the kind of entertainment they turn to is adult entertainment.”

Flynt did not say if the $5 billion would help subsidize employee parking in his building, nor did Francis earmark the funds for his legal fees. But it's all in good fun. Maybe Francis will hook Congress up with some GGW hats and mini-tees if it shows him its titties.

· Hustler (hustler.com)
· Girls Gone Wild (girlsgonewild.com)

Honestly, we don't think it even looks like her — that seems to be happening a lot these days — but then, the idea that Ashley would get thrown out of a hotel in Miami and then take her top off for a bunch of drunk frat boys isn't so farfetched either. Plus, it was five years ago ... which would have made the now (supposedly) 22-year-old, um ... 17? Maybe Joe should check those archives again before he gets himself into more trouble.

· "ASHLEY DUPRE IN 'GIRLS GONE WILD' VIDEO" (nypost.com)

Previously: Everything Else You Wanted To Know About Hookers (But Didn't Care Enough To Ask)

If more of the drunk college chicks and fledgling nightclub exhibitionists who've showed off their ta-ta's for the Girls Gone Wild camera crews had followed this babe's example and called their dads first to tell them what they were about to do, there's every possibility that currently incarcerated boob impresario Joe Francis might have found himself with less legal challenges from outraged parents over the years. Then again, he might also have found himself with a lot less material with which to build his empire to begin with. Still, you have to admit it was a considerate gesture. Let's just hope Dad's curiosity doesn't get the best of him once she winds up on one of those late night infomercials—because, you know, that would really be creepy.

· "Babe calls her dad before stripping for Girls Gone Wild" (yourdirtymind.com)

· Which sign of the apocalypse involves Pamela Anderson returning to star in the Baywatch movie? Because the end times are clearly here. (hollywoodtuna.com + egotastic.com)

· You'd think a marketing convention would have the best booth babes of all, since those guys really know how to sell things. Oh, it's online marketing? We guess that's okay, too. (adrants.com)

· A single-celled parasite has been found to cause an increased libido in women, but how the heck are you supposed to get her infected with it before your big date? (esquire.com)

· Joe Francis is charged with sexual battery in a Hollywood case that is completely unrelated to his other legal troubles. Now they're just piling on. (hollywood.com)

· Naked robots are part of our future. Or maybe our past, when robots were still made out of felt. (mimikirchner.com)

· Oh, that whole Virginia Tech thing? It's porn's fault, obviously. (xbiz.com)

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Previously: Morning Wood Archives/Wet Spots Archives

"Girls Gone Wild" svengali Joe Francis is behind bars in Panama City, ironically the place where Ashley Judd found peace in "Ruby in Paradise". Francis was reportedly on his way to turn himself in, having chartered a jet for that purpose, when airport authorities saved him the trouble.

Francis was picked up on a contempt of court charge, ultimately stemming from a 2003 lawsuit filed by women claiming to have been underage when GGW employees filmed them. "Ruby in Paradise" had been filmed ten years earlier, when sweet Ashley Judd was 24. - GP

· "Girls Gone Wild" creator arrested at airport (tmz.com)
· "Girls Gone Wild" Wikipedia entry (wikipedia.org)
· Joe Francis: "Baby, Give Me a Kiss" (latimes.com)
· Dispatches from "Girls Gone Wild" (slate.com)

Previously: Porn Valley Dispatch Archive

· Joe Francis refuses to surrender on contempt of court charges, says "It is a case of a judge gone wild." Zing! Good one, Joe. (Defamer)

· It's not fair to advertise a nude lesbian vampire sex scene between Lucy Liu and Carla Gugino, and then give us sixty seconds of poorly lit fumbling barely worthy of Cinemax. It's just not fair (egotastic.com, also seen @ idontlikeyouinthatway.com)

· Hugh Hefner remembers who Anna Nicole Smith is and says Playboy is planning several promotional tie-ins memorials. Stay strong, buddy. (cnn.com)

· "The 10 Real Reasons Why Geeks Make Better Lovers." Hand us that 8-port wireless router and we'll show you No. 11. (wired.com)

· Emmanuelle Chriqui makes "Entourage" a little bit more watchable. Especially when you can watch her nipples and not the actual show. (wwtdd.com)

· A restaurant gets cited because of their dancing chicken in a bikini. No, not dancing chicks in bikinis. A dancing chicken. Yes, that is what this world is coming to. (nbc5i.com)

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Previously: Morning Wood Archives/Wet Spots Archives

· Watch out, y'all ... another "celebrity" sex tape is supposedly hitting the interweb any day now. You'll never care guess who it is! (OK, it's Lauren and Jason from MTV's "The Hills". Hey, there was a time when you didn't know who Kim Kardashian was either.) (entertainmentwise.com)

· Uma Thurman wears her new bikini ... sorta. The suit isn't really serving any purpose at this point. (egotastic.com + hollywoodtuna.com + drunkenstepfather.com)

· "Girls Gone Wild"'s Joe Francis has been ordered to get a little less wild ... in jail. Perhaps his fellow inmates will take off their jumpsuits for him. (sun-sentinel.com)

· So now a nude-but-not-really photo of the sister of an American Idol contestant that everyone hates anyway qualifies as a scandal? Doesn't anyone have drug-fueled hooker orgies anymore? (worldofwonder.net)

· The editor of Playboy Indonesia is suddenly no longer guilty of indecency. We guess they finally got around to reading the articles. (reuters.com)

· Strippers in Florida will now be allowed to get really nasty on stage. We might have to go and exercise some "artistic freedom" of our own. (orlandosentinel.com)

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Previously: Morning Wood Archives/Wet Spots Archives

· These "new" Keeley Hazell pictures look suspiciously familiar, which means either that they've been published before or they came to us in a dream. There's a pretty good chance it's the latter, so we better link to them anyway just to be safe. (sexypix.thumblogger.com)

· Meanwhile, Tara Reid treats us all to an eyeful of some old friends, minus those uncomfortable-looking plastic surgery scars this time around. Everything old really is new again! (egotastic.com)

· How can the porn industry combat piracy? Turn everything into a live broadcast. Sorry, no do-overs. (news.com.com)

· This story about three Mexican cab drivers showing porn in their taxis also sounds like a repeat, but it isn't. Cab drivers just really like their porn. (foxnews.com)

· Students raise quite a ruckus by printing a special "sex issue" of their high school newspaper. Boy, some kids will do anything to piss off their parents. (unionleader.com)

· A Florida newspaper editor concludes that a bill to ban Girls Gone Wild TV commercials will not stop online porn, as if the two were somehow related. Also, he believes everything he reads on the internet. (t-g.com)

· A town in Germany apparently has a problem with too many people having sex outdoors, which is why we've added it to our itinerary for that next trip to Europe. (iol.co.za)

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Previously: Morning Wood Archives/Wet Spots Archives