If these are real (and we're leaning towards yes on that one), it would seem that there's some sort of curse on British beauty pageant winners—both Danielle Lloyd (a former Miss Great Britain) and Imogen Thomas (a former Miss Wales) were mired in sex tape scandals... could Amy Guy follow suit?

(Though, to be honest, we'd feel like it's more a blessing than a curse. At least for us.)

· Miss United Kingdom 2005 Topless- Amy Guy (taxidrivermovie.com)

Lest you thought you were watching yet another reason for the mothballing of Guantanamo Bay, the mass ass-presentation of (from left) Ava Rose, Bobbi Starr, Bree Olson, Trinity Post, and Mika Tan to the cruel whips of Nina Hartley and Claire Adams that led this story was in honor of the release of "O2: The Surrender of O."

Here Adams scandalizes the proper Hartley with some ribaldry.

At the Webmaster Access West convention, an annual get-together of Internet nerds who happen to own the porn industry, The Internet's Ashley Steele poses with two eskimo girls from the affiliate program Flashcash. Who cares if she can't see Russia from her house?

Then Bobbi Starr returned at Hollywood's Golden Apple Comics to launch Nerdcore's 2009 calendar (she's Miss November). As you can see, here she is attempting to fist the Silver Surfer.

Finally, we caught geektrix extraordinaire Justine Joli trying to leave the city of Los Angeles. "If you try to keep me," she did not say, "you never really had me."

Join us after the gap for more Popshots, in which we show porn stars not as the world sees them but how they really are.

. . .

Elson and Sascha—America's hardest-working male German porn performer!—discuss an issue common to every couple: Whither creampie?

Across town, tiny Destiny dons a kabuki mask and a strap-on (read my article in September's Atlantic Monthly: Rejected Kiss Army Accessories) for David Aaron Clark's "Asia Noir 6."

The striking Coco Velvett slowly melted into that couch for the next 45 minutes as Destiny turned into a demon.

In posh Bel-Air, bite-sized Teagan modeled her new breasts for photographer Holly Randall. "They actually bunce when I run," said Teagan.

Meanwhile, Roxy DeVille says, "Hello, Fleshbot Readers!"

"People would tell me about your ass, Teagan, " said the towering DeVille, "but I really had to see it to believe it. Oh My Fucking God."

Instead, here's Scarlett Fay in a picture she took herself. More Popshots (including that of the shemale midget) after the jump.

. . .

The shemale midget in question seems to have no name. Ordinarily we'd say that was fine, because how many shemale midgets could there be? She could simply be "The Shemale Midget."

But records for the site Shemale Juice (I need to be alone now) are kept in Brazil, where I think they've got a shemale midget president. So let us raise a caipirinha glass to the unknown female midget!

Adrianna Nicole, on the other hand, is not a midget. She is, in fact, a bee.

In an exclusive interview, Nicole was simultaneously coy and outrageous. "While I can't explain why I might have looked like a bee in this picture," she said, "all I can say is that my hive was full of honey and I think the two might go together."

If Nicole is a bee, we would like to keep the living daylights out of her.

Tommy Gunn at home with his dog and fish.

Belladonna stepping on Mr. Pete's hog.

Rackonteur Ernest Greene (in that he puts people on racks) and Nina Hartley at home. She describes him as a Sex Minotaur.

Newcomer Robin Truelove. We know this is stretching, but MEOWRR.

Daniel and Madison Young do it doggie style in "Undone."

Finally, Ms. Margie Schnibbe (aka Vena Virago), director of "Pornstar Pets" at her "Honey Bunny" art opening.

See also: "Pornstar Pets"

Of course, being an adult awards show, there was much more going on everywhere but the stage. Still, we made sure to watch now and then, seeing as how we're voters. See our gallery (now fully captioned!) after the gap.

. . .

· XRCO Awards (xrco.com)

Submit to some snaps after the gap, slaves.

. . .

"O"lson looks over the contract she will sign for Stone's character, Steven, reprising his role from the first movie. Greene wrote the script respecting tenets of lifestyle arrangements of power exchange relationships.

"If I get something wrong," he said, "they let me know."

Olson in her collar. "She gets the submission," Greene said. "She's perfect for this."

Nina Hartley preparing the sealing wax in a crucible. "We bought this from a company that supplied (HBO's) 'Deadwood,'" she said. "They told us this was the only other one they've sold since then."

Guess who's posing? ("Thanks for letting me look smart," Stone, this year's AVN Male Performer of the Year, said.)

Like my contract with Gawker Media, O's deal with Steven was consummated on a table.

"O2: The Surrender of O" is scheduled for release in September.

· Adam & Eve (adameve.com)
· Bree Olson (breeolson.com)
· Evan Stone (evanstone.com)

See more snaps after the gap.

The story is as American as "The Grapes of Wrath": two roller rivals settle their differences in each others' vaginas and somehow Ron Jeremy is involved. What's more, Kayden Kross adds that special element to luchador surf-guitar music.

L.A.'s Fearleaders cheer on a cast of non-nude but just as compelling extras, including members of a real-life L.A. women's roller derby league.

Penny Flame adjusts her blades, Eva Angelina dazzles the camera, and Sunny Lane ponders a return to her former career of figure skating as Alektra Blue surveys the scene. Sunny and Alektra are the cast's most accomplished skaters.

Don't ask what Ava Rose used to polish the floor; just be happy for me.

Bree Olson needlessly adjusts something (don't adjust a goddamn thing) while the referee explains a call to Sunny Lane.

A member of Glendale's Moonlite Rollerway staff told me that the rink's Over 50 club would be skating right over this spot the next day. If they had only seen Bree et al this way, doubtless they would not conclude that youth is wasted on the wrong people.

· Adam & Eve (adameve.com)
· Zero Tolerance (zerotolerance.com)

Regardless, the finest of what this region has to offer frolicked anew this week, knowing that six long hours of winter would soon be over. Here's the delightful Audrey Hollander doffing her folksy gingham dress for our delectation. See more snaps after the gap.

In response to Digital Playground's recent contract star announcements, we wanted to remind you of Stoya. That is all.

Here's Adrianna Nicole and Annette Schwarz looking Adriannettadorable™.

Speaking of doffing, young Britney Stevens doffed her frilly tutu on the set of Hustler's "XXX 28", directed by Hollander's husband Otto Bauer.

Whatever Alec Knight is doing, he is making both Kissy Kapri and Stevens react the exact same way on either end.

Finally, Audrey Hollander from earlier in the day, in the dress she took off for the picture that began this week's Popshots. Doesn't she look good wholesome?

We begin with a return to last weekend's San Francisco Fetish Ball, where we couldn't tell what hurt more — those restraints or that electrical tape. See more snaps after the gap.

Author and firebrand Susie Bright is even more attractive when she's being coy. Here she is at a recent reading of her "The Best of Best American Erotica 2008" in Los Angeles.

The Battle of the Plus-sized Temptresses broke out in Burbank as Bettie Rage confronted Cleopatra of the Nile with stealing her mans.

"No one tries to steal my mans," Rage did not say.

Joey and Evanka Buttafuoco smile for the camera in Hollywood following the release of their sex tape. "We only found out that room had a camera in it later," Joey told me with a straight face.

And here's the lovely Amy Fisher, who mailed this picture from the set of a Howard Stern Show appearance that she would end up leaving prematurely. "Let's talk about 2008," she said.

Pursuant to your 'load dropping'...Blue-eyed and silver-tongued devil (he's a lawyer as well as a porn dude) Don Hollywood shares some pointers with whippersnapper Nick Manning.

Finally, the delightful Rose girls, Ava and Mia, get in some family reading time at Ava's place. Mia has returned to performing after a brief hiatus and Ava looks even sweeter without makeup.

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Previously: Popshots Archive

See more snaps after the gap.

. . .

People really have fun at these events. In the background is Cousin Stevie, 65, uttering some variant of "I can't believe I get to do this."

Heather Silk's lactation (she's a second-time mom) became a hot topic during the day.

Flower Tucci has back and knows its marketing potential. Her instruction to the cameraman was, "Go in low so my ass looks huge."

The raw and the cooked: Tucci oils up Silk before lathering up herself.

· Cousin Stevie (cousinstevie.com)
· Flower Tucci (flowertucci.com)
· Amber Peach (amberpeachxxx.com)
· Heather Silk (heathersilk.com)

. . .

Lucky bastard Cousin Stevie is joined by Heather Silk, who came from Florida to star in the upcoming 24th installment of his "Pussy Party" series.

"I thought you loved me best," said (Another Reason To Love) Canada's Tina Tyler as we snapped a picture of some here-today-gone-tomorrow 19-year-old flibbertigibbet. We do love you best, Tina; if you would only let us cry.

We were embarrassed when the appearance of gay porn auteur Michael Lucas and Titan vice president Keith Webb caused us to lose control of our camera. We took several bad pictures and Lucas' face did not move an inch. Finally he said, "Just stand back there and take it."

Ashley Steel (whom we taught Latin) celebrated her semi-anniversary with Internet gadfly Halcyon Styn. "Are you living in Styn?" we probed. "No, but I keep Q-Tips at his house," said Steel.

· "XBIZ Announces 2008 Awards Winners" (xbiz.com)

While her breasts were not the focus on the set of "Azz Fest 6" this week, she did us the favor of showing them anyway. Here she and Mr. Pete wonder what an "azz" is, anyway.

Monique Alexander and Samantha Ryan react differently to the prospect of Fleshbot readers seeing them naked. I think Ryan has the right idea, though we'd let Alexander take a shot at convincing us, too.

We got a passel of photos from amateur porn shoots in Peru this week (all models are over 18) and were fascinated with this woman's take on the schoolgirl motif. Who ever heard of a black top on a schoolgirl? We don't know her name, but we have a crush on her. Here she is naked. We knew you'd appreciate it.

* * * * *

Previously: Popshots Archive

· "Lily Allen Nipple Slip Pictures" (egotastic.com)

Previously: Celebrity NippleWatch™ Archive

See more snaps of the pornstars of today as they really are after the jump.

Here the Richards girls (of Tila Tequila music video fame) get down to their birthday suits. But it's OK ... their manager points out that because they are merely stepsisters "they are willing and able to be in the same scene." Whew! Wouldn't want any awkward conversations over Christmas dinner.

In another part of town, April Flores held court at the "Voluptuous Life" launch party. She's not a celebrity yet, but she should be.

You don't need an alethiometer to know wich way the wind blows:

It is whispered that Alexis Arquette, whose sister is dating Sir Paul McCartney, grew weary of Saturday's Academy of Television Arts & Sciences Ribbon of Hope 2007 Celebration and wandered down the street to a porn party instead. Here she is with "Spunk'd" director Justin Kane, right, porn ambassador Pamela Peaks, left (she gave James Deen his porn name!), and, I think, Dodi Fayed.

* * * * *

Previously: Popshots Archive