Sweded Porn: Be Kind, Rewind, And Undress

Anyone who saw the Jack Black/Mos Def/Michel Gondry film "Be Kind Rewind" earlier this year already understands the joy of being "Sweded." If you didn't see it—well, it's a bit complicated, but basically a Sweded film is an amateur remake of a classic movie using homemade props and your friends as actors, which is how the main characters in "Be Kind" save their small town video store from greedy land developers. (It made more sense at the time.) The marketing department at video sharing site Shufuni must have seen it too, because now they're asking users to make their own Sweded movies—but with nudity and sex, of course. And they're offering prizes to the best interpretations. More »

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Flesh Flicks: Lords And Ladies

... And the award for Best Costume Design goes to whoever put together these snazzy numbers that give a little of that Old World feel to this not-so-dangerous liaison! They look more Elizabethan than "medieval," if you ask us, but you get the idea. A couple of naughty members of the King's court slipping behind the tapestries to get feudal with it. Although they do sacrifice some nudity, we are impressed that they managed to keep most of the outfits on during the tryst, but we'd still bet anything that the costume shop didn't give them their deposit back. More »

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Flesh Flicks: Top That!

We like how the girls in this video continually escalate their toy arsenal as if they were part of a Cold War-era dildo arms race: from a few a well-placed fingers on up to the double dong, every time you think they've reached the top they take it to another level. So industrious those porn lesbians are! Now if all leaders settled their pissing contests in such a non-threatening and mutually beneficial sort of way, the world would be a much nicer place. More »

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Flesh Flicks: Bukkake Surprise Party

The problem with being a porn actress like Sierra is that you never get a moment's peace. Even when she thinks she has a chance to masturbate alone in a locker room, it only takes a few minutes for about 150 guys to magically teleport in and take their pants off. Another quiet time ruined ... and then followed by 11 minutes of guys coming on her face. (Sorry if we ruined the ending for you Harry Potter fans—but surely you knew what was coming from the title?) More »

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Flesh Flicks Flashback: Elvis Lives ... And He's Fucking Sunrise Adams

We probably should've saved today's Flesh Flicks selection for another couple of weeks so we had something to post to mark the thirtieth anniversary of the death of you-know-who next month ... because really, how many Elvis-themed porn clips can we expect to come across anyway? But some things are just too good to keep to ourselves for that long. In this clip from the (perhaps deservedly) forgotten 2002 porn classic "Burnin' Love", The King takes some time out of his busy toilet-plunging schedule to tend to Sunrise Adams' clogged pipes. Turns out Elvis really never left the building after all ... he was just held up in the bathroom for a while. More »

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Video Playpen: "Caught" In The Act

If there's one good thing about this ultra-paranoid, hyper-surveilled government nanny state our world has become, it's that pretty much every sex act that takes place anywhere gets caught on camera. Security cams, web cams, cellphone cams ... if you're getting busy anywhere that isn't a pitch black airtight container, chances are it's being recorded and will eventually be uploaded to the web. There are so many different places for you to get caught that the only limit is the imagination of the pervs who are spying on you. By the way, we certify that every one of these clips is 100% genuine amateurs caught unawares, having sexual relations that were not at all staged. The internet wouldn't lie to us. More »

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Flesh Flicks: Alisha Klass & Chloe Go Fist-To-Fist

Nothing against live-on-stage shows, but all that noise and crazy rock show lighting is a little distracting: sometimes you need a more intimate setting, like the up close and personal touch of this double-fisting tutorial. This clip starring legendary pornstresses Chloe and Alisha Klass is an oldie but a goodie, and when we stumbled upon it on the same day as the previous post, it was almost like an omen. We think it means that if you've been feeling the urge for some heavy double-handed love, this weekend is probably the time to indulge. More »

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Flesh Flicks: A Summertime Treat

Does your neighborhood have one of those annoying ice cream trucks that blares its obnoxious music 24/7? We hate those things and all the little rugrats chasing after it, but maybe we're just jealous because it's geared toward the younguns. For instance, if there was an adults-only truck that served treats like this, it would definitely change our tune. As long as they change the tune on the truck. How about Sinatra or maybe some Barry White? That will keep the kids away. More »

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Flesh Flicks: Girls Like It Too

Just so you know, it's a complete myth that women read Playboy because of the articles. They're jerking off to it too! If you don't believe us, here's definitive video proof that ladies love to fap to other naked ladies. We sort of knew it all along, but it's always good to have hard evidence to back up your theories. We just hope this girl is not alone (metaphorically speaking, of course.) More »

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Flesh Flicks: Did Someone Have A Rough Day?

It's still early in our re-deployment stage, but we already get the sense that some of our readers might feel like the Japanese schoolgirl featured in this video—caught unawares, tied up in knots, confused, distressed, short of breath. These are the symptoms of those who fear change, and you're not alone. So fret not, little ones. We'll smooth out the kinks and get through this together—bigger, faster, stronger. That's when the real pain ... er, fun begins. More »

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Video Playpen: If You Can't Stand The Heat, Get Out Of The Kitchen

Next to the bedroom, is there any place in the house that gets more action than the kitchen? The inviting smells, the oils and sauces, the utensils ... it's like an erotic factory of culinary carnal delights. Plus, let's be honest ... linoleum is hot. Naturally, there was quite a selection of kitchen-themed videos to chose from for this edition of the Playpen, so grab a big spatula and get in there and mix it up. If you don't like cooking on the countertops, hey ... you can always eat out. More »

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