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Previously: Fleshbot Babes Archive

Adult film superstar Lisa Ann leads the charge in front of Veronica Rayne, Victoria Valentino, Regan Anthony, Morgan Reigns, Holly West, Velvet Lick, Misty Vonage, Ricki Raxxx, Jazella Moore, Austin Kincaid, Briana Beach, and plucky April Blossom.

There can be no mistaking who the Queen Bee of all MILF's is at this point. Lisa Ann dominates both the box cover as well as her partner. She is such a fucking ferocious man eater. But hey: we already knew that. Hall prophetically warned us that one day she would cum—and boy, was he ever right. Seems almost like an understatement at this point.

The retrospective includes a number of our favorite gone-but-not-forgotten performers, MILF's who have long since collected their just rewards for their arduous labors and converted them into lunch money and school supplies. We couldn't be more grateful to see some of them again.

"MILF Mania 3" comes out next week. Check out a little of what the double disc spectacular has to offer in our exclusive gallery below. Go easy on the cougars next time you see them, though. Their time will come. You can count on it.

Buy "MILF Mania 3" (gamelink.com)
Buy "MILF Mania 3" (gamelink.com)
Buy "MILF Mania 3" (gamelink.com)
Buy "MILF Mania 3" (gamelink.com)
Buy "MILF Mania 3" (gamelink.com)
Buy "MILF Mania 3" (gamelink.com)
Buy "MILF Mania 3" (gamelink.com)
Buy "MILF Mania 3" (gamelink.com)
Buy "MILF Mania 3" (gamelink.com)
Buy "MILF Mania 3" (gamelink.com)
Buy "MILF Mania 3" (gamelink.com)
Buy "MILF Mania 3" (gamelink.com)
Buy "MILF Mania 3" (gamelink.com)
Buy "MILF Mania 3" (gamelink.com)
Buy "MILF Mania 3" (gamelink.com)
Buy "MILF Mania 3" (gamelink.com)
Buy "MILF Mania 3" (gamelink.com)
Buy "MILF Mania 3" (gamelink.com)
Buy "MILF Mania 3" (gamelink.com)
Buy "MILF Mania 3" (gamelink.com)
Buy "MILF Mania 3" (gamelink.com)
Buy "MILF Mania 3" (gamelink.com)
Buy "MILF Mania 3" (gamelink.com)
Buy "MILF Mania 3" (gamelink.com)
Buy "MILF Mania 3" (gamelink.com)
Buy "MILF Mania 3" (gamelink.com)

Who doesn't love a parade, so long as they don't have to clean up afterward? Unlike the disturbing lyrical imagery of Jim Morrison's "Soft Parade,"the engines that effortlessly hum in this "Hard Parade" are engines of lust.

Consumers of commercial pornography want the same things as ordinary people everywhere. In a dying economy that, coupled with free internet porn, was totally killing the industry we know and love so well, they overwhelming reacted to corny spoofs of their favorite television shows and movies. They just wanted a little fanfare, to embrace the familiar and known, coupled with a soft and friendly place to satisfy their urges. So Hustler gave it to them. Then others copied their success. And now, like Hindus and Muslims in India, it's on like mofo donkey kong bitches!!! The war for porn spoof supremacy has officially been cranked up a notch.

Hot on the heels of their blockbuster chart topping "Star Trek" spoof, they go and drop an ode to Gordon Ramsay's hit cooking reality show "Hell's Kitchen," starring Marcus London as the iconic mercurial TV chef who weaves a tapestry of obscenities with the same superfluous ease with which he makes a souffle. Lording over a cast of supreme hotties that include luscious young Kagney Linn Karter, Missy Stone, Aiden Starr, Veronica Rayne, Callie Dee, and Kylee Reese, London singles out smoking hot "it" girl of the moment Kagney Linn Karter to marinate his sausage up inside. Her tiny lubricious mouth and pussy help Marcus churn up a fresh batch of piping hot fuck butter that he sprays all over her face.

Other noteworthy performances include the ridiculously hot little sex machine Aiden Starr. Is there anyone she can't fuck? We heart you, Aiden. So very very much.

"This Ain't Hells Kitchen XXX" is set to release by the end of this month but we wanna show you this exclusive sneak peek now. It ain't tricking if you got it. Now check the set...and break on through to the other side.

Hustler Video (hustlervideo.com)
Hustler Video (hustlervideo.com)
Hustler Video (hustlervideo.com)
Hustler Video (hustlervideo.com)
Hustler Video (hustlervideo.com)
Hustler Video (hustlervideo.com)
Hustler Video (hustlervideo.com)
Hustler Video (hustlervideo.com)
Hustler Video (hustlervideo.com)
· Hustler Video (hustlervideo.com)
Hustler Video (hustlervideo.com)
Hustler Video (hustlervideo.com)
Hustler Video (hustlervideo.com)
Hustler Video (hustlervideo.com)
Hustler Video (hustlervideo.com)
Hustler Video (hustlervideo.com)
Hustler Video (hustlervideo.com)
Hustler Video (hustlervideo.com)
Hustler Video (hustlervideo.com)
Hustler Video (hustlervideo.com)
Hustler Video (hustlervideo.com)

There are a few rare humans who are born without the capacity for jealousy and clinging possessiveness. For the rest of us, it's something we are indoctrinated into at an early age and, through tremendous personal growth, attempt unshackle ourselves of as we shed layers of social programming and enjoy the ineffable fruits of our efforts. Though the path is difficult and arduous, what awaits just beyond the jealousy is the fulfillment of sexual desires so thoroughly and deeply buried in your right now that you aren't even conscious of them. Trust us. They're in there, just waiting for you to do the work to free your mind.

Back in the 70's, the idea of wife swapping reached public acceptance with the introduction of "key parties"—a cultural phenomenon that played to the strengths of free love and uninhibited group sex. The idea was simple: as couples filed into the party, the men would drop their car keys into a fish bowl. Wives would then blindly draw out a set and partner up with whomever they belonged to. Famed sex author and Fleshbot friend Tristan Taormino asserts in "Opening Up," her new book on polyamory, that this concept was allegedly spawned amongst married Navy personal in San Diego.

Since then, the climate of America has been radically transformed—ironically, by many of the same people. The former agents of free love have given in to a moral panic that's usurped sexual exploration, transforming it into a benignly flavorless stew harnessing the energy more for reproduction than recreation.

Which is why the latest release from Pink Visual, "Wife Swap Volume 6" is so refreshing. At no point during the action do we get the sense that there's anything out of the ordinary in the behavior of these loving, sexually liberated couples. In fact, Evie Delatosso, Kelly Kline, Mario Rossi, Richard Kline, Jack Lawrence, Puma Swede, Shy Love, Steven St.Croix, Emilianna, Joe Rock, Kayla Paige, Will Powers, Barry Scott, Dick Delaware, Lacey Love, Lindsay Love, Burke, Jack Vegas, Tina Tink, and Veronica Rayne couldn't be happier to be swinging back and forth with each other.

We could all learn a lot from these post Nietzschean darlings about living more human than human. But for now, just kick back as a casual observer and enjoy this fine set of promotional pictures provided by Pink Visual.

"Wife Swap, Volume 6" releases this week, heralding what could be a brave new world.

· Pink Visual (pinkvisual.com)

. . .

· 'Pirates II' Trailer Premieres Online (avn.com)
· Pirates II: X-Rated Trailer (piratesxxx.com)
· Pirates II: R-Rated Trailer (youtube.com)
• Order: "Pirates Ii: Stagnett's Revenge" (Adult DVD Empire)

But the love between Jack Vegas and Veronica Rayne is real, as is that of every couple captured by performer-turned-director Lynn LeMay in "In Love." See how they keep it together after the jump.

. . .

There are more real-life porn couples than you'd think; people who fuck other people for money or kicks but keep that special, mortgage-sharing relationship at home. Lynn LeMay puts together a few of these couples in a movie that isn't afraid to equate spousal bickering with foreplay.

What is charming about the movie is that these real-life couples are asked to walk through basic pornic scenarios, and each in their turn bring something real to a genre that is routinely forgiven for its unreality.

An abundantly oiled Jack F., who is revealed to have a corresponding tattoo with his mate, Darryl Hanah, sexes her up. I don't remember what the pretext was, but that's the great thing about being married - you can find context anywhere!!

Then there's Natasha Nice and Mateo. You don't know why or how they are together, but you assume they are, and that makes this standard-issue couch-based scene worthwhile. Why? Because you're thinking: Hey! They both switched to Geico at the same time!!

Finally, Allison Pierce and partner Sebastion (that's how they spell it in the credits) engage in a heated tryst in the same room as scenes 1 and 3. That's OK, because she's wearing high heels. LeMay has really hit on something here, in that she can put together a movie that hits all the marks necessary for a porn film but that is otherwise unremarkable, save for one thing: we feel we know something about the cast, and in light of that everthting seems so much more natural.

Maybe Allison Pierce does wear high heels to bed....

· LeMayzing Inc (lemayzing.com)
· Buy "In Love" (gamelink.com)

I liked "Couples Seduce Teens 6", a movie made for probably $12k, better than the multisquillion dollar "Janine Loves Jenna". Why? The stories were more compelling and they left the lights on. Bonus: no one committed suicide!

Read our review after the gap. - GP

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Couples Seduce Teens 6

Studio: Pink Visual
Director: Rico Strong
Cast: Julie, Kaci, Sammie, Kinzy, Emily Evermore, Veronica Rayne, Lexi Lamour, Ethan Cage

Review by Gram Ponante

This Internet-to-DVD series is one of my favorites because, when the right couple is involved, one is fairly certain that when they aren't collecting fees for their work, they are picking up girls at the gym anyway.

Such is the case with real-life couple Lexi Lamour and Ethan Cage. The scenario of an older (well, she's in her 30's, which is darkly erotic in our metropolitan areas) woman luring the 19-year-old Kaci to her home for a post-workout "protein shake" is almost feasible.

Kaci feigns surprise that Cage comes to pick the ladies up in his Honda. "I thought you said you weren't married," Kaci gamely protests.

"Oh, he's the one who makes the protein shakes," Lamour says.

If you lived in Southern California for at least three weeks and had breasts, it is likely the very same thing would happen to you.

Once home and with honest-to-God protein shakes delivered (in wax cups), Kaci is still shy.

"You seem intimidated," the confident and amiable Lamour says. "But you're in good hands."

"Am I?" Kaci asks.

The first scene of these movies is always the longest. It is usually the only one that bothers with an extended setup, establishing for the rest of the movie the dance long-term couples must do every goddamn time they lure home a teen.

But this movie takes its time with each interlude, which makes the title better.

Lamour dons a strap-on and Kaci reveals she has two pierced nipples and a tongue stud. "You're no innocent teen," I spat. One has the sinking feeling that this was all planned. Further de-hoisting my suspension of belief was Kaci's "Jesus Loves Porn Stars" t-shirt, ubiquitously available at the Erotica L.A. and AVN conventions.

Reality aside, if you're in the steam room and Lamour approaches, do anything she says. Get in the car with her and do anything she says.

Next up is Michelle and Reno scouting for Julie, who they find outside a panaderia selling nuts for a school trip. As intriguing was the backstory, I fast-forwarded. The interesting thing was that Julie probably made more money with this scene than she would have selling trinkets in a parking lot.

The Couples Seduce Teens series has evolved a little since the last time we visited it. A little more attention is paid to a throughline, and it pays off. The setups don't take the audience for granted, either; no one believes this is really happening, but the reactions are fun to watch.

Especially when potential babysitter Kinzy comes by to Veronica Rayne's house to find her and her husband, Joe (Pink Visual keeps budgets low by not identifying any of the couples in the credits and reducing the teens to single names ... this is infuriating) in the hot tub naked.

"Sorry," they say. "Whoops."

The couple quiz Kinzy on her sexual activity.

"Is this a question you should ask babysitters?" she asks.

"Well, I don't want to come home and find you and your boyfriend having sex on the couch," Joe replies, his dick hanging out of his towel. "Not that that would be bad."

Kinzy is the most reticent of the teens; she takes some working on. At the end, she finds that the couples' "babies" are dogs. It's sweet.

Lexi and Ethan are back for a tryst with Emily Evermore, who they find at Porn Valley's Pierce College. If Kinzy was reticent to the point of being a little boring, Evermore breaks her innocent character now and then with porn tropes like "How do you like that pussy??"

A movie that tries its best to conform to the tenets of reality porn, Couples Seduce Teens 6 succeeds through the exertions of its horny couples, even if the girls they pick up don't seem worth the effort. Myself, I would have just stayed home with Lexi or Veronica. Jesus. Who needs teens?

· Buy "Couples Seduce Teens 6" (gamelink.com)
· Couples Seduce Teens (paysite preview @ couplesseduceteens.com)

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Previously: Reviews Archive