We're especially crushed out on—well, actually, we kinda have crushes on everyone in the video (that's allowed, right?). We've pulled a sample clip for you (at left)—if it leaves you feeling hot and bothered, check out the full video at Hulu. (We'll be busying ourselves checking to see if Howcast has a "How To Have Great Anal Sex" softcore porn tutorial.)

· Howcast: How To Have Great Phone Sex (full video @ hulu.com, via Baby Sinead)

· Phillip Toledano's "Phone Sex" (phonesexthebook.com)
· "Offbeat Artist: The Faces of Phone Sex Operators" (digitaljournal.com)
· Phillip Toledano Photography (mrtoledano.com)

Memorial Day Weekend means that May—also known as National Masturbation Month—is almost over. That's right—only one week left to jerk off! As we approach the end of this most selfish of celebrations, we asked writer, editor and Magic Wand enthusiast Rachel Kramer Bussel to sit down and tell what she thinks is so great about the sport and also share some personal preferences for playing solitaire. Strangely enough, it took us the better part of the month to find someone willing to discuss the love of a lifetime so frankly and openly (and on camera). It shouldn't be such a big deal to admit to doing what everyone else in the world does with such gusto, but kudos to Rachel anyway for taking the bullet. What about your trusty Fleshbot editors, you ask? Hey, mind your own business!

· Rachel Kramer Bussel (rachelkramerbussel.com)
· Video by Richard Blakeley

Previously: Masturbate-A-Thon 2007: Still Coming For A Cause, Masturbation Intervention: Know When To Say When, National Masturbation Month: A Hands-On Guide, Party Report: Rachel Kramer Bussel Is Not On Top, Rachel Kramer Bussel's Kinky Blog Tour

· You know your 15 minutes are over when your homemade celebrity sex tape is so boring, no one even wants to put it on the internet. Better luck next time, Lauren Conrad! (tmz.com, via Gawker)

· Girls Aloud singer Sarah Harding gets $200,000 to stand around in her bathing suit. How much to see her in the birthday suit? (toxicmagazine.com)

· Attorney General Alberto Gonzales admits that mistakes were made and US Attorneys were fired for not prosecuting enough obscenity cases, but that it's also totally cool and he didn't anything wrong. Says to Congress: "We're still buds, right?" (yahoo.com + avn.com)

· Is that fetish model Sativa Verte shaking her booty on Fuse TV's PantsOff, DanceOff? We know she's an expert at the "pants off" part, but does she have any rhythm? (fuse.tv)

· Ahh, the things journalists will do for a story ... like work as phone sex operator. Still no answer as to which profession is more shady. (ctnow.com, via Boing Boing)

Previously: Morning Wood Archives/Wet Spots Archives

· Who would you rather see in a bikini: Uma Thurman or Courtney Love? Choose wisely: how well you sleep tonight may depend on it. (egotastic.com + hollywoodtuna.com)

· Celebrities ... their dates buy Magnum condoms even though they don't really need them. Just like us! (Gawker)

· Not surprisingly, the Chinese government is also not a fan of the porn. Those guys will censor anything. (xbiz.com)

· Yeah, what is "buck phone sex"? And is it really worth ten dollars? (copyranter.blogspot.com)

Previously: Morning Wood Archives/Wet Spots Archives

Forget the porn stars, call girls and orgy divas—some of the wildest times are had by the girls next door. Behind the quiet facades of the harried mother and the strict science teacher lurk the hearts of wonton hussies, flagrant sluts and closet dominitrices. In today's roundup of some of our favorite posts from the sex blog scene this week, the neighborhood gals prowl empty apartments, lust among the produce aisles and put chopsticks to all sorts of creative and nefarious uses.

Ring the doorbell and run with Jefferson after the jump.

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Sex Blog Roundup
by Jefferson

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The Apartment Concludes

You take my hand and roll me onto my back, taking the hand that just held your cock and placing it over my head. You reach down and bring my other hand up, holding both my hands above my head. Moving your lips down my face, you kiss the hollow of my neck. Then trace a trail with your tongue over my breasts and around each nipple. While one hand still pins my arms, the other runs over my tummy and across my thighs until it rests on my pussy. You take your middle finger and slip it between my lips, sighing as you feel my warm wetness.

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Fuck Phone

The first call he made to me on his new phone was to give me the number they had assigned him. There would only ever be one number in that phone. Mine. We affectionately call it the 'Fuck Phone'. That is the reason for its existence in our world. A connection between two worlds that will never meet. A thing that lives in a dark coat pocket until the need overwhelms and the power button is pushed. The fuck button. I know when that number comes up on my own cell phone that it is time to fuck. That he has found a place, usually semi-private. A public bathroom or a corner spot in some shaded parking lot.

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Rug Burn

"Hmmm," I said, staring at his mouth, at the way his lips curved when he said fuck. Oh yeah, fuck! SHE trilled in response. He didn't notice my abstract mindedness, and just kept talking. "I was all over him on the road, didn't let him go," he continued. Hells yeah, you can be all over me you sexy, foine ass thing you, SHE continued. I tried to focus, I really did, but I felt like I was having two conversations in one and I found the more he talked the less I could focus. Mmmm, those lips, I want them all over me, stop talking and come to mama!

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Tit Torture (Part 2 of 2)

I bend down to pick up a small stringy rubber flogger. It's not an intimidating toy - in fact, it's very light, only stinging ever so slightly when used its hardesthard. The best part about the toy is the way it plays on skin. Flailed loosely, it stings as it tickles. Flailed hard and solid, it thuds as it caresses. And, more importantly, it can wrap around what it hits, its little skinny tails grabbing at anything and everything. Like chains. Like clothes pins.

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Food is Sex is Life

For the cook in me, foreplay begins with produce. Surrounded by fruit and vegetables of every imaginable shape and color, items for consumption suddenly become items for pleasure. Walking the aisles with the sexiest man I've ever known puts everything in a different light. Blood oranges look like me, he says. This exact cucumber is just like him, I notice. We can barely stop grabbing at each other. The nice old lady stocking the greens sees us blushing and smiles. We get that a lot.

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Date Night
Levi usually tops, for good reason. He is brilliant with restraint.

I, on the other hand have been not-so-brilliant. The chains slip clumsily from my lube-slick latex gloves, and some of my knots look like they have been tied by a remedial cub scout. You have to give me an A+ for effort. You try putting your partner in a leather straight jacket, chaining him up in some bizarre way, and then try to find a way to mount his ridged cock while wearing a catsuit (sweatsuit at this point!), corset, six-inch platform thigh-high boots, neck corset, gas mask, and murder gloves. It's complicated. 99% of the time I just jack him off.

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Thumbnail via FTV (TGP/preview gallery @ ftvcash.com)

Previously: Sex Blog Roundup Archive