Fleshbot: straight, madonna

Vintage Madonna Nude Photo On Sale At Christie's

Lux Alptraum — Fri, 16 Jan 2009 16:30:01 EST

The alleged Katy Perry nude may be just a big old fake, but a very real nude photo of Madonna at twenty is on sale at Christie's and expected to fetch at least $10k.

Hmm... think Katy Perry would consider claiming the photo as genuine and splitting the profits with her good friend Fleshbot? Just a thought...

· Nude Photo of 20-Year-Old Madonna on Auction Block (nytimes.com, thanks B!)
· Christie's Lot 6/Sale 2139 (christies.com)

Madonna's New Beau Is (Not) A Pornstar

Lux Alptraum — Fri, 02 Jan 2009 16:30:01 EST

Much as we would love to be able to tell you that Madonna is dating a "secret pornstar" (as Stuff would have you believe), we must report that the truth is far more mundane.

Yes, twenty-year-old Brazilian model Jesus Luz, who's been seen cavorting with none other than Madge herself, appeared in Hostel, a racy late night Brazilian TV series. But we're sad to say that Jesus had a non-sex role. Oh, the humanity!

But hey, who knows? Maybe we'll happen across a Madonna/Jesus sex tape. Then everyone will be happy. (Except, perhaps, Madonna and Jesus).

· Madonna's Brazilian hunk in porn flick (stuff.co.nz)
· Madonna's Beau Has XXX Past (xbiz.com)

Sasa Basta Covers Madonna (But Not Her Songs)

Dashiell Bennett — Wed, 27 Aug 2008 13:20:30 EDT

Hey, do you remember like 50 years ago or something when Madonna (the other one) wrote that hilarious "Sex" book? Well, she didn't "write" it exactly—but she did pose for a bunch of calculatedly controversial, occasionally blasphemous dirty pictures. Anyway, Greek magazine Nitro totally wants to relive those days, so they hired blonde Madonna kindoflookalike Sasa Basta to recreate some of the most memorable poses from that classic pop culture moment. Do you also remember when people used to be shocked and outraged by this stuff? Boy, those were the days!

· Greek Playmate Sasa Basta As Madonna (dailypoa.com)

Every so often we think back to those halcyon...

Jonnobot — Mon, 21 Jul 2008 11:15:25 EDT

Every so often we think back to those halcyon days of 1992 when Madonna was sexy and interesting ... and every so often, someone comes along and posts a bunch of scans from her "Sex" book to remind us just how sexy and interesting she used to be. Suddenly, it's 1992 all over again. (thenipslip.com)

At this point, looking at naked Madonna...

Jonnobot — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 11:56:53 EDT

At this point, looking at naked Madonna pictures from the early 90s is like finding a photo album of our old aunt's days as a swingin' nudist before we were born, but if you're not as easily bored and/or creeped out about these things as we are then here you go. Besides, how many opportunities do we have to link to Vanity Fair anyway? (vanityfair.com; see especially 1991 and 1992)

A Las Vegas mechanic thought he discovered...

Dashiell Bennett — Wed, 20 Feb 2008 10:13:23 EST

A Las Vegas mechanic thought he discovered a never-before-seen, one-of-a-kind print of a nude Marilyn Monroe, but it turns out it was just a naked Madonna poster that 4 million college boys have had on their dorm room wall. Whatever you do, don't show him this post. (nydailynews.com)

Evidently inspired by a certain regular...

Fleshbot — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 13:33:29 EDT

Evidently inspired by a certain regular visitor to our Marital Aid Test Kitchen features, Madonna was spotted leaving a London hotel carrying a "Purple Penetrator" strap-on dildo. Good to know that the old gal still has it in her. (So will Guy Ritchie, apparently.) (dailymail.co.uk; make like Madonna and order your own Purple Penetrator here)

Madonna is suing to prevent an old, old...

Dashiell Bennett — Fri, 03 Aug 2007 13:08:53 EDT

Madonna is suing to prevent an old, old boyfriend from selling nude photo and letters from her past. You know, because you can't find old pictures of Madonna having sex just anywhere. (femalefirst.co.uk + toxicmagazine.com + webpark.ru)

We asked for Winona Ryder without a top;...

Dashiell Bennett — Tue, 31 Jul 2007 14:01:18 EDT

We asked for Winona Ryder without a top; instead we get Madonna in a wet t-shirt. Her best work was in the 80s, but we guess that's close enough. (drunkenstepfather.com)

Morning Wood: Celebrating Pornography's Primary Effects

Dashiell Bennett — Wed, 11 Apr 2007 11:00:15 EDT

· What can you say about Halle Berry in Esquire in her underwear? Perhaps a moment of quiet reflection is in order. (sexypix.thumblogger.com + mannysbabes.blogspot.com + egotastic.com)

· Here's an explanation of the concept of pornography's "secondary effects." We think you're all well aware of the primary one. (firstamendmentcenter.org)

· Want to see a nude painting of Madonna? You'll wish you didn't. (toxicmagazine.com)

· The Sun discovers furries and with them, a whole new world of bad sexual puns. (thesun.co.uk)

· American Apparel does it again. And again, And again. Couldn't they work some balloons into the ad as well? (copyranter.blogspot.com)

· We think the "family condom" concept is brilliant. Every time you break one out, it reminds you of the responsible, stable adulthood you've been working all your life to avoid. (livejournal.com, via Boing Boing)

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Previously: Morning Wood Archives/Wet Spots Archives