Fleshbot: straight, lynnlemay

Learn The Feminine Mystique From "Not The Brady Bunch XXX: Pussy Power"

Ottimo Massimo — Thu, 17 Dec 2009 17:00:00 EST

Sure, this episode was good, but Will Ryder should probably move on before Cousin Oliver shows up.

Not The Bradys XXX: Pussy Power

Studio: LFP Distribution/X-Play
Director: Will Ryder
Cast: Lexi Belle, Dylan Riley, Kacey Jordan, Alana Evans, Lynn Lemay, Ashlyn Rae, Nicole Ray, Tanner Mayes, Mike Horner, Kris Slater, James Deen, Mikey Butders, Ron Jeremy, Eric John, Seth Gamble, Dane Cross

On this episode of "Not The Bradys," young Jan (now played by Dylan Riley) feels neglected by her family, teachers, and—most of all—the boys at her school. Little does Jan know that all she needs to get a little attention (or tickets to a concert, or good grades) is some Pussy Power. And with that skirting-the-edges-of-sexist comment, let the film begin!

Lucky for Jan, bad girl Tanner Mayes shows up at the Brady Compound and wildly masturbates in Jan's bed, which somehow introduces her to the world of mature decisions and sexual favors. Jan realizes that the key to Marcia's success has always been blowjobs, and so her only hope of "being good at something" lies in emulating her big sister.

Meanwhile, everyone else is having sex, looking good in their ‘70s garb, maintaining erections and wholesome imagery, etc. Lexi Belle is the new Marcia, and she fits the role just fine. Her secret romp with the high school quarterback is not only inspirational to the viewer, but to Jan and Cindy as well.

On the male side of things, all is well. James Deen is still adorable as Peter. He somehow manages to look goofy and enthusiastic in the middle of his scene with Tanner, just like good ol' Christopher Knight. Mikey Butders embodies the coy Bobby Brady just as well. His threesome with Ashlyn Rae and Nicole Ray is one of the finest in Brady family history. Except maybe for that one time Alice stumbled into Mr. and Mrs. B's bedroom.

But hey, gang! There are some things more disappointing than Jan's violin playing (insert laugh track here). They still haven't delivered on that real, slow Sam the Butcher/Alice loving, although the characters talk about it non-stop. However, there is a simulated sex scene in which Alice ducks behind the kitchen island and Ron Jeremy pretends to be fellated most comically. Like most of the humor in Will Ryder parodies, this goes until it becomes awkward, keeps going, and then arbitrarily stops.

All in all, it feels like another Will Ryder movie: the sex is very good, the comedy is very bad, and everyone can feel ok about the lack of Brady-on-Brady boinking. The whole Pussy Power thing is something to think about. We always wondered how Carol convinced a man to take her and her three daughters in; "much more than a hunch" indeed.

"Ejacula 2" The Future

Gram Ponante — Fri, 30 Oct 2009 11:30:01 EDT

In 1993 the world met "Ejacula," a vampiress who, probably because she was immortal, missed the memo that Duran Duran fashions had expired several years earlier. But we also met Tonisha Mills. Two years later the whole "Ejacula" gang returned.

"Ejacula 2" is just as inscrutable as the first, but damn did porn have money back then. Shot in Europe with an all-star cast including the young Rocco Siffredi and the even-then-only-allowed-to-work-with-his-shirt-on Ron Jeremy, "Ejacula 2" follows the uneven acting of several careless guests, a couple of vampire hunters, Lynn LeMay, and a coven of vampires on one wild weekend featuring, as the boxcover says, "an outdoor BJ" and "ass eating."

This movie symbolizes porn excess in that no one cared if the acting or story or camera work was good as long as the women became naked. Since the women do (in a 14-person orgy scene, no less), to find fault with what is now a cultural artifact seems like elder abuse.

Tonisha Mills and Lynn LeMay look lovely as always, and Ron Jeremy overacts to perfection.

· Hustler (hustler.com)
· Buy "Ejacula 2" (tlavideo.com)

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Buy "Ejacula 2" (tlavideo.com)
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Buy "Ejacula 2" (tlavideo.com)
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Buy "Ejacula 2" (tlavideo.com)
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Buy "Ejacula 2" (tlavideo.com)
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Buy "Ejacula 2" (tlavideo.com)
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Buy "Ejacula 2" (tlavideo.com)
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Buy "Ejacula 2" (tlavideo.com)
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Buy "Ejacula 2" (tlavideo.com)
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Buy "Ejacula 2" (tlavideo.com)
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Buy "Ejacula 2" (tlavideo.com)
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Buy "Ejacula 2" (tlavideo.com)
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Buy "Ejacula 2" (tlavideo.com)
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Buy "Ejacula 2" (tlavideo.com)
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Buy "Ejacula 2" (tlavideo.com)
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Buy "Ejacula 2" (tlavideo.com)
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Lynn LeMay Is An Inspiration To Us All

Lux Alptraum — Fri, 24 Jul 2009 12:00:00 EDT

With all the worry about the environment, we've been trying to be eco-friendly. One good suggestion: save water by taking a shower with a friend. One better suggestion: skip the shower, and just get naked with a friend.

We're pretty sure Lynn LeMay and her friend eventually plan to take a shower (this is, of course, the '80s, so they're less worried about global warming and whatnot), but we hope you can all take some inspiration from their decision to go with sex first...and, you know, forget about the shower altogether (we're sure that sex will leave you feeling nice and clean, anyway).

· Buy "Precious Gems" (vcx.com)

Fleshbot Birthday Babes(TM): Lynn LeMay

pweasels — Thu, 18 Dec 2008 12:30:01 EST

There was something intriguing about Lynn LeMay twenty years ago, when she was first getting started, and there’s still something intriguing about her today, now that she turns 47.

It’s not her boobs; although they’re fascinating, almost hypnotizing, there are a lot of girls with big boobs. We think it might be her cheekbones. Then again, it might be her chin. We’re going to sit here and look at pictures of her until we figure it out.

In the meantime: happy birthday, Lynn. If you read this, and you know what it is about you that is so interesting, please write and let us know.

Bio data courtesy of the Internet Adult Film Database

· Internet Adult Film Database (www.iafd.com)
· Lynn LeMay at IAFD.com (iafd.com)
· Buy Lynn LeMay’s movies (gamelink.com)

"Ejacula" Makes You Want To Stoker

Gram Ponante — Thu, 23 Oct 2008 20:00:32 EDT

You'd think that if a sexy vampiress were to have a choice of where to bite her porn movie victims, it would not be the neck. But you would also not guesss that Ron Jeremy could so completely disappear into and inhabit a role as in his interpretation of a worm-eating hunchback in 1993's "Ejacula."

Ejacula

Shot in a castle somewhere in Europe with a German and Italian crew, Ejacula details the exploits Ejacula (Patricia Kennedy) and her consort (Rocco Siffredi) and their faithful hunchback as they have sex parties, chow down on delightful, fleshy Tonisha Mills, and somehow move through the sunlight without burning to a crisp.

The plot doesn't make too much sense but it also doesn't get in the way, and Method Man Ron Jeremy acts up a storm.

The real discovery for this smitten viewer is Mills, who suddenly de-Springerized the name "Tonisha" for me.

Studio: VCA
Director: Max Bellocchio
Cast: Tonisha Mills, Lynn Lemay, Patricia Kennedy, Caroline Monroe, Lois Ayers, Beatrice Sall, Vivian, Elizabeth, Allesandra, Ron Jeremy, Rocco Siffredi

Review by: Gram Ponante

· Hustler (hustler.com)
· Buy "Ejacula" (tlavideo.com)

Lynn LeMay Is "In Love"

Gram Ponante — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 12:24:44 EDT

He is covered in tattoos, she is biologically altered in the breastular region! Both use names different from those given to their forebears at Ellis Island!

But the love between Jack Vegas and Veronica Rayne is real, as is that of every couple captured by performer-turned-director Lynn LeMay in "In Love." See how they keep it together after the jump.

. . .

There are more real-life porn couples than you'd think; people who fuck other people for money or kicks but keep that special, mortgage-sharing relationship at home. Lynn LeMay puts together a few of these couples in a movie that isn't afraid to equate spousal bickering with foreplay.

What is charming about the movie is that these real-life couples are asked to walk through basic pornic scenarios, and each in their turn bring something real to a genre that is routinely forgiven for its unreality.

An abundantly oiled Jack F., who is revealed to have a corresponding tattoo with his mate, Darryl Hanah, sexes her up. I don't remember what the pretext was, but that's the great thing about being married - you can find context anywhere!!

Then there's Natasha Nice and Mateo. You don't know why or how they are together, but you assume they are, and that makes this standard-issue couch-based scene worthwhile. Why? Because you're thinking: Hey! They both switched to Geico at the same time!!

Finally, Allison Pierce and partner Sebastion (that's how they spell it in the credits) engage in a heated tryst in the same room as scenes 1 and 3. That's OK, because she's wearing high heels. LeMay has really hit on something here, in that she can put together a movie that hits all the marks necessary for a porn film but that is otherwise unremarkable, save for one thing: we feel we know something about the cast, and in light of that everthting seems so much more natural.

Maybe Allison Pierce does wear high heels to bed....

· LeMayzing Inc (lemayzing.com)
· Buy "In Love" (gamelink.com)

DVD Review: "Not The Bradys XXX"

Gram Ponante — Mon, 15 Oct 2007 15:29:30 EDT

While director Will Ryder's much-hyped "Not The Bradys XXX" is not a porn parody the way "The Da Vinci Load" was in that it doesn't add anything new and only imagines familiar characters having sex, its attention to detail, faithfulness to a "Brady Bunch"-style storyline (but with cumshots!), and—most important for good porn—an instinct to not get in its own way, makes this movie a fun purchase.

Porn In The Family: Keeping It Together

Fleshbot — Sat, 05 May 2007 00:30:01 EDT

Xfanz concludes its five-part "Born For Porn" series on family values Porn Valley-style with a profile of adult industry legend Lynn LeMay, who's found that even dealing with pervy fans can be a way of bonding with her progeny: "Sometimes people would come up to me and say, 'Can I touch [your breasts]?' ... And I'd say, 'Would you like to meet my daughter?' It's a whole new level of fun." But LeMay isn't the only one whose made porn a means of staying close with the ones you love: previous installments of the series featured a few clans you may have been aware of already (the wacky Glassers of Showtime's "Family Business" fame; porn pixie Sunny Lane and her manager parents) and at least one that we weren't, Missouri siblings and up-and-coming porn starlets Tommie and Tawni Ryden ("We always had a leg up on everyone else, ... We were never stupid about sex.") Next time someone stars crowing about how porn is destroying the basic unit of our society, we hope they keep these folks in mind and remember that when it comes to families, it takes all kinds.

· "Born For Porn" @ Xfanz: Seymore Butts, Sunny Lane, Tommie and Tawni Ryden, Ava and Mia Rose, Lynn LeMay (xfanz.com)

- - -

See also:

· "I Love Ava & Mia" and Tommie Ryden in "Who's That Girl #3" (Adult DVD Empire)
· "Mia and Ava Rose in Double Trouble" (gramponante.com. 6/06)
· Order: "Family Business: The Complete First Season" and "Family Business: The Complete Second Season" (Amazon)

Previously: The Return of Lynn LeMay, Sunny Lane Gives You Her "Prime Time", Meet Ava Rose, Mainstream Crosssover Watch^TM: De'Bella Does "The Insider", "Family Business" on DVD, The Gibson Sisters, Meet Holly Randall, "Portrait of Sunrise", "Perfect Specimens 2", Meet The Love Twins, Shae and Rochelle

The Return of Lynn LeMay

Fleshbot — Wed, 04 Oct 2006 11:00:08 EDT

We're starting to think that old(er) porn stars never really retire: they just lurk in the shadows for a while waiting for all the new crops of girls to burn themselves out until deciding just the right moment to stage a high-profile comeback. This week, 90s porn sweetheart and AVN Hall of Fame member Lynn LeMay returns to the hardcore spotlight with the release of the aptly titled "Phoenix: Risen From the Ashes", the debut release of her new Lemayzing Productions production line—and will be giving free copies of the DVD to all her faithful fans who join her website. ""This is my return to the industry after having been out of the biz for so long," LeMay might have actually said according to the press release. "I'm stepping back into it with something new." Judging from the four scenes in "Phoenix"—one of which includes a scene with Fleshbot crush object Caroline Pierce, herself ripe for an eventual comeback a decade hence—it looks like she never forgot any of those steps to begin with.

· Lynn LeMay (LynnLeMay.com)
· "Lynn Lemay's Lemayzing Enterprises Debuts" (AVN)
· Lynn LeMay (profile and interview @ lukeisback.com)