<![CDATA[Fleshbot: straight, drugs]]> http://tags.fleshbot.com/assets/base/img/thumbs140x140/fleshbot.com.png <![CDATA[Fleshbot: straight, drugs]]> http://fleshbot.com/tag/straight/drugs http://fleshbot.com/tag/straight/drugs <![CDATA[Scandal: Denise Only Squirts When She Smokes Chronic]]> One of my favorite series, wherein I am reminded of a real inner creepiness, is "Crack Whore Confessions." But Denise, cover girl of Volume 6, merely smokes pot. Odd that, this time, my innocence was lost without a crack pipe.

Save for a healthy Tampa pot belly, his dick, and every now and then his arm, director/interrogator Cracker Jack is not seen in these five interviews with real live hookers in Vegas hotel rooms and Florida trailers. But he gets his money's worth from the five working girls, peppering them with questions whose answers get more interesting depending on the interviewee's level of intoxication.

But Denise, a dead ringer for Jennifer Lopez in "Out of Sight" and the most put together (and conventionally attractive) of the bunch, reveals by way of admission into this series that she once squirted while sliding down a stripper pole, high on chronic. The rest of the scene only reveals her increasing skeevishness with Mr. Jack, rather than any crack habit. Once the deed is done she high-tails it out of there.

And good for her. It is a probably a sign of her recovery that she does.

The remaining subjects are far more interesting and Jack's true raincoater status is revealed. The viewer thinks, "It is I who would have to be on crack to accept a blowjob from that substance abuser." And there, but for the grace of a crack pipe, go you.

Would that Cracker Jack take over the helm of Digital Playground's "Jack's Playground" series; I would become a porn fan.

· Crack Whore Confessions (crackwhoreconfessions.com)
· Buy "Crack Whore Confessions 6" (gamelink.com)

Crack Whore Confessions (crackwhoreconfessions.com)
Buy "Crack Whore Confessions 6" (gamelink.com)
Crack Whore Confessions (crackwhoreconfessions.com)
Buy "Crack Whore Confessions 6" (gamelink.com)
Crack Whore Confessions (crackwhoreconfessions.com)
Buy "Crack Whore Confessions 6" (gamelink.com)
Crack Whore Confessions (crackwhoreconfessions.com)
Buy "Crack Whore Confessions 6" (gamelink.com)
Crack Whore Confessions (crackwhoreconfessions.com)
Buy "Crack Whore Confessions 6" (gamelink.com)
Crack Whore Confessions (crackwhoreconfessions.com)
Buy "Crack Whore Confessions 6" (gamelink.com)

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<![CDATA[Living The High Life: Happy 420 From Some Ganja Lovin' Girls]]> We would be slightly remiss if we let April 20th pass without at least one post on, you know, that "420" thing.

Lucky for us, our friends at Altporn.net are slightly more diligent than we are when it comes to this whole "marijuana" thing, and have rounded up not one, not two, but four smokin' hotties to help celebrate the high holiday. Who said stoners were lazy?

· 420 Girls: Lexi Belle Interview (altporn.net)
· 420Girls: Brooke Banner Interview (altporn.net)
· BurningAngel: Baby Sinead Getting High (altporn.net)
· EroticBPM: Bonnie Behind the 420 Store (altporn.net)

*****

Previously: "Bong Load Girls" Are 420 (And Fellatio)-Friendly, A Hit Of Kayden Faye Would Do Us Nicely

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<![CDATA["Bong Load Girls" Are 420 (And Fellatio)-Friendly]]> Not into stoner humor, stoner coughing, stoner politics, stoner carpets, stoner music, or even John Denver? No matter. The squarest among you will coax a "Load" of your own when encountering the delicious Scarlett Pain.

Rob Rotten's years-in-the-making, self-financed homage to Humboldt County's Greatest Natural Resource is pungent with girls that are just as into pot culture as he is. "Bong Load Girls" plays like a mix tape jammed in your dealer's Pinto, except with, you know, pictures.

We meet back-to-nature masturbating girls, girls you can eat pizza with, girls that do themselves with dildos that double as bongs, and trippy girls that can't say no to Trustafarians. Rotten's movie was filmed over three years ("Is that Gia Paloma?") and is as silly and disjointed as any pothead's ramblings - but in the same way it also makes complete sense.

For the person who will fast forward through the dancing pot leaf imagery and cut right to the sex, take heart: Rotten might have required that all the female performers be 420-friendly, but you don't have to be stoned to appreciate them.

Speaking of 420, the DVD is available on that date but the VOD is ready now.

· Punx Productions (punxproductions.com)
· Buy "Bong Load Girls 1" (gamelink.com)

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<![CDATA[Sexploitation Clip Of The Week: "Unholy Matrimony"]]> What happens when you mix S-E-X with LSD? Whatever it is, you probably won't remember it after you come down, but this movie sure makes it sounds like F-U-N. Well, except for the blackmail. Always with the blackmail. Can't anyone have a drug-fueled suburban orgy without some tough guy in a cowboy hat shaking you down for a few thousand dollars? No wonder everyone has to take so much LSD before they get freaky.

· "Unholy Matrimony" (1966) (imdb.com)
· Clip courtesy of Bedazzled Blue (bedazzledblue.com)

Previously: Sexploitation Clip Archive

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<![CDATA[ Some people want over-the-counter "sexual...]]> Some people want over-the-counter "sexual aids" taken off store shelves because somehow having Horny Goat Weed available at the Pick N' Save turns everyone into whores. How come no one ever does anything about the dastardly influence of beef jerky sticks? (caller.com)

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<![CDATA[ Oh Mary Carey, we had such high hopes for...]]> Oh Mary Carey, we had such high hopes for you when you did that whole "Celebrity Rehab" thing, and we were really looking forward to seeing the new sexy and sober you in action. But then someone sent us a link to these pics from your birthday bash in Vegas last weekend, and ... well, let's just say we sort of missed the old, messy, party animal Mary Carey too. Either way, those new boobs of yours look fabulous. Don't ever change, k? (vanityspy.com)

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<![CDATA[A Water Bong, A Pair Of Jugs, And Thou (What More Do You Need?)]]> Remember what we said about smoking weed and big boobs being two great tastes that taste great together? Well, it seems we're not the only ones who feel that way. In fact, the young lady in this video seems quite taken with that fine combination. Though she might want to reduce her marijuana intake by just a smidge, or at least do whatever it is she needs to do to get her camera aligned properly. (Not that her boobs aren't lovely sideways; it just makes us a little dizzy.)

. . .

· bong and my boobs! (pcdnv4.xtube.com)

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<![CDATA[Enjoying The Finer Things, Two At A Time]]> With our hectic schedules of opening porn boxes, watching porn, and writing about porn, we're pretty big on multitasking whenever possible: reading the paper while we ride the subway to work, eating breakfast while we catch up on early morning breaking porn news, and of course, finding a drug dealer who's also able to procure hot young models and put on live sex shows for our voyeuristic pleasure. Sure, there are some who might accuse us of rushing through life and not taking the time to savor each experience on its own ... but aren't smoking weed and big boobs just two great tastes that taste great together anyway?

. . .

· Big Boob Heaven 04 (megarotic.com)

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<![CDATA[ Building a online porn empire worth over...]]> Building a online porn empire worth over $60 million dollars is easy—blowing the entire fortune on heroin and gambling and having to move back in with your parents is the hard part. Australia's Greg Lasrado did it, but we don't recommend following his lead. (smh.com.au)

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<![CDATA[ Better minds than ours have no doubt been...]]> Better minds than ours have no doubt been coming up with plenty of pantastic headlines all weekend to describe the strange case of CNN reporter Richard Quest, who was arrested in Central Park last week with what law enforcement agents described as "a rope around his neck that was tied to his genitals, and a sex toy in his boot." In the meantime, we'll just take this opportunity to remind you once again that meth is a hell of a drug, kids. (news.aol.com; more @ nypost.com)

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<![CDATA[ What was the key factor in Maxim magazine's...]]> What was the key factor in Maxim magazine's success in America? Maybe it was because the publisher was hooked on crack when he got the idea to bring it here? Or that he once killed a man just to watch him die? (Seriously, Felix Dennis just confessed a murder in a newspaper interview. The naked lady pictures are great and everything, but this dude's got issues.) (timesonline.co.uk)

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<![CDATA["Déjà Vécu": Meeting (And Fucking) Nico Elise]]> You don't see many porn trailers that enlist a Ricky Nelson tune to help set the mood, never mind ones that show a disaffected-but-(therefore)-hot tattooed alt chick doing massive rails of coke in between bouts of getting fucked by a stranger with a penchant for stretching out her mouth and nostrils like they were part of some flesh-based game of cat's cradle or something. But then, fledgling auteur Blaise Christie is not your average brand of pornographer. Not having seen "Déjà Vécu" in its entirety, we can't tell you whether it's worth the $19.95 asking price or not — but for fans of a certain type of gritty, lugubrious smut aesthetic (you know who you are) it may be just the ticket. Sex, drugs and depressing '50s ballads ... what's not to love?*

· "Déjà Vécu" (trailer @ electrofilms.com)

*Update According to an email we received from model Nico Elise herself, neither the DVD nor the domain were authorized by her, which makes the whole enterprise sort of creepy as far as we're concerned. Fleshbot recommends you save your $19.95.

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<![CDATA[The University of Virginia is testing a new...]]> The University of Virginia is testing a new "female Viagra" which is actually a gel (no, not this one) that women rub on their arms to make themselves horny. If they made it taste like whipped cream or chocolate sauce then you could solve two bedroom problems at once. (foxnews.com, via brahsome.com)

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<![CDATA[ Returning your books to the library in a...]]> Returning your books to the library in a timely manner displays a basic level of responsibility and community spirit, especially when you remove all the boring pages and replace them with pot and porn. Who says reading isn't fundamental anymore? (local12.com)

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<![CDATA[Breaking: Professional Model Sells Body To Make A Living]]> Sophie Anderton is part of the new breed of celebrities who are pretty much famous just for being famous and are prime targets for tabloid newspapers even though no one can remember why the tabloids ever cared about them in the first place. Naturally, we only know her name because of a sex tape scandal that seemed kind of silly at the time, but now sounds perfectly plausible after a British paper caught her in a "sex sting." A "reporter" for the News Of The World pretended to be a businessman, hired Sophie for a "date" and then filmed her doing a whole bunch of embarrassing things (like cocaine) and offering to bring herself and a friend on a three-day sex trip to the Bahamas for £15,000 a night.

We suppose it's somewhat shocking that a beautiful woman known primarily for her body and semi-public sexual escapades would offer herself up as an extremely high-priced call girl to lonely businessmen, but at the same time, we're still a bit puzzled by this entirely manufactured scandal. Why would a "journalist" (using the term very loosely) go to the trouble of such an operation simply to embarrass a perfectly harmless woman? Why stand by like a drooling voyeur, egging her on in her dangerous behavior, only so you could later turn around and tsk-tsk her like a gossipy judgmental neighbor. Why lie, cheat, and (possibly) break the law just for a juicy story?

Oh, right ... money. Which is exactly why she fucks strange business men in the Bahamas. What a whore, huh?

· "Celeb star Sophie Anderton is £10k hooker and coke dealer" (newsoftheworld.co.uk, via goldenfiddle.com)

Previously: Sophie Anderton Sex Tape Rumors

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<![CDATA[Been stocking up on those "herbal Viagras"...]]> Been stocking up on those "herbal Viagras" you found super cheap down at the corner store? We hope you saved your receipts, because it turns out, they can have some pretty bad side effects. Surprised? And we always thought we could trust the makers of Horny Goat Weed! (ap.google.com)

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<![CDATA[Marital Aid Test Kitchen: Phallix' Dildo Bong]]> The delicious Trina Michaels is the type of person we of a certain age called "straight edge"; she doesn't drink, she doesn't smoke. What does she do? Well, she has sex for money and she stretches her acting chops by posing convincingly with glass dildos that are also bongs.

2007_11_5_matk1.jpgNow that you think of it, you probably wouldn't be amazed at how many purveyors of glass sex toys started out as purveyors of glass bongs. Sun Valley's Phallix is one such company, and has been featured everywhere from Playboy TV to Lanny Barby's labia in demonstration of its dildonic artistry.

But it hasn't been until now that the old has been combined with the new, and the poker is the smoker.

We usually have real people testing out our marital aids, real people who are shy but who actually use the products. In this case, we have Trina Michaels, who is not shy but who doesn't smoke pipeweed. The fact is that she could probably stand six to ten feet away from this product and it would still sell.

2007_11_5_tm2.jpg
I handled it myself (the bong, not Michaels, alas) and found it pleasantly heavy, easy to clean (idf that's what you're into), and easy to pack. Much as Bill Clinton must have felt about that experienced cigar, so might you if you pack a Death Row Records-size bong after it has been used by a friendly neighbor, or vice versa.

Full disclosure: Fleshbot operatives never smoked anything out of this, knowing that paparazzi would show up as soon as we started lighting up a dildo, but we have a good feeling that it works.

· Phallix Glass (phallixglass.com)

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Previously: Marital Aid Test Kitchen Archive

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<![CDATA[It turns out that Viagra may do more than...]]> It turns out that Viagra may do more than just give you a hard cock, it may turn you into a lovesick puppy ... with a hard cock. Sounds like another cure that just might be worse than the disease. (cnn.com, via Jezebel)

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<![CDATA[The drug Requip may cure the fake disease...]]> The drug Requip may cure the fake disease known as "restless leg syndrome," but it also has some other interesting side effects, like "pathological gambling" and "hypersexuality." We got news for ya, buddy—that ain't your leg that's restless. (counterpunch.com - thanks Martin!)

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<![CDATA[ There are so many things wrong with this...]]> There are so many things wrong with this Viagra commercial that we can't even begin to make a joke about it, but man do we really hate Elvis right now. (YouTube, via copyranter)

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